Love and marriage may go together like a horse and carriage. But horse and carriage rides, though they may be romantic, can also be extremely bumpy. And one thing that can help a marriage survive the inevitable periods of turbulence is a sense of humor. Marriage is rarely if ever perfect. But at least it's usually the source of some great jokes.

Here are 40 of the funniest tweets from married people from the past month about the realities of marriage:

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Flirting is hard, and sometimes humiliating.

We spend so much of our lives figuring out how to lure in crushes and potential dates, that we sometimes miss the obvious opportunities in front of us. There are few moments of embarrassing regret worse than realizing you missed obvious sexy signals from a crush.

In a popular Reddit thread, people shared times they didn't realize someone wanted to sleep with them, and it's truly painful to behold.

1. From OP:

So my boss comes into work one day with his hand wrapped up in gauze, but it's pretty busy so I wasn't able to ask him what happened. Finally, after things quiet down, he calls me and our other co-worker to tell us about his 'epic' evening. He got a call the night before from a girl that he used to be kind of flirty with back in High School, but she joined the army straight out of graduation and nothing had ever really happened between the two of them. Turns out she recently finished her tours, moved back home and bought a house of her own and all was fine and dandy with her life, save for one thing, namely there was a snake in the house. She called my boss (let's call him Rob) because she "didn't know anybody else who would be willing to handle a snake."

This confused Rob as he had seen pictures of her handling camel spiders, scorpions and snakes while on tour overseas. Additionally, he now lived 45 minutes away from their hometown and it was already 10:45pm. She said she could handle the wait and she would find some way to repay him if he was still willing. Rob agreed and drove over there. Upon arriving she answered the door in a camisole and dancer's shorts, greeted him with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. She tells him it's just a harmless common snake, and it's in the living room.

Lo and behold, there is an about four-foot black snake chilling in the corner of the room near the heater. She identifies it as a black snake, and tells him it is not poisonous. So thinking 'no big deal', he just walked up to it and grabs the thing. "This is where the story gets epic", Rob tells us as he starts unwrapping the gauze from his hand. The snake lashed out and bit him. "I was so pissed at the snake," he says while showing off the pretty wicked set of puncture wounds on the back of his hand "that I just punched the damn thing as hard as I could. And I'll be damned if it didn't outright kill the little bastard!"

"F*ck man, that's wicked", my co-worker says. "No sh*t? What happened next?" I ask.

"Well, she thanked me and invited me to have a drink to celebrate my awesomeness and said she would take a look at the bite, but it was really late and I knew I had to be here today so I just went home. Didn't get home until 1:30 or so, though, I was just too pumped to go to bed right away."

"Wait, what? You went home? After she invited you to stay for drinks?"

"Yeah, I was tired....why are you looking at me like that?" (Our co-worker has already begun chuckling to himself at this point. He is a paragon of suave-a*s ladies men and has been regularly nailing it down since he was thirteen).

"Just to clarify, you got a call in the middle of the night from a woman asking you to come over to deal with a snake, a snake she identifies as not poisonous. And this is a woman you know to be otherwise unafraid of things such as snakes. You oblige her, ride up on your white f*cking horse and slay the motherf*cker with your bare f*cking HANDS, taking a wound in the process. She then invites you to stay and have drinks, yes?"

"Yeah, I don't see where..."

"Tell me Rob, why didn't you get laid?"

What followed was a long, confused silence, gibbered denials, and enough fuel for mocking to ensure that my co-worker and I didn't have to work Saturday for two whole months. He attempted to try and meet up with her for a date, but she was so pissed at him that she refused him outright. He's happily in a relationship now, but he never did get that girl's promised repayment for his services.

TL;DR: Boss-man rides up to save a flirty girl from a snake, kills it in the most manly way he can come up with on the fly and then misses every signal for sexy times as he rides off again.

2. From nick_345:

I was working retail some years back. Imagine a group of people age 20-24 on the average who like to party and shag like nothing else. So there was a bit of the old "sexual tension" between me (just some regular looking f*ck) and this beautiful, redhead, short, co-worker chick with amazingly big green eyes, a killer smile and a crazy side (who was also a gymnastics buff).

So one night, she and her neighbors were having a party. We were playing some games and having drinks when she invites me to see her apt (everyone was next door). We go up to her room. She says to lay down and get comfortable. At this point, everything is f*cking wonderful. She puts on a movie, curls up, puts my arm to her chest. We start talking and I'm trying to heat things up. Then she doesn't respond. We are talking 3 minutes tops from arrival to asleep. Are you f*cking kidding me? I have an erection you could club a baby seal with. I see if she is knocked out (that light "hey, you awake?"). No luck.

I go and finish the party and head home. The next time I see her at work, she asks why I left. Told her couldn't sleep and didn't want to wake her. She then tells me, in great detail, that I should have stayed and what she had planned for the morning to reward my patience. Lesson learned, but I still regret that sh*t 5 years later. I have a handful of these, but I'm too sober for more of this sh*t.

3. From LlamaExpert:

Unofficial St. Patrick's Day at my Uni:

I was hanging around a beer pong table, when a random girl brushes by me.

Me: (Inebriated Austin Powers accent) "You just touched my bum!"

Her: (grabs my junk and pull me towards her) "Whoops...Unofficial."

Me: (Steve Brule accent) "...You just grabbed my dingus."

I am an idiot.

4. From JoshwaarBee:

Recently started college, fairly attractive girl invites me out to a party after class. I say no thanks, because last time I said yes to that kind of thing, I ended up looking after some passed out guy in a cold wet field for a whole night. But then she gets right up close to me and says something to the effect of "C'mon, you can come to mine first and we can bake cakes!", which I was absolutely certain was a euphemism for "Let's f*ck".

Anyway, I say yes, we go back to her house, and bake cupcakes. Later, her boyfriend shows up and we all go out and get stoned.

The cupcakes weren't even that good. :(

EDIT: I'm still not sure if she is flirting with me, or just being friendly.

5. From Geruvah:

Met this great Serbian girl at a friend's party in Brooklyn. She was gorgeous to even the most critical of men. I thought she was going after another guy so I honestly didn't care. We started to talk about comic books and zombies. Two of her favorite things. Not a moment of awkwardness.

The party was over and it was time to leave. A friend offers a ride for everybody and she was going to go. He asked me if I wanted one. I declined; the train will be just fine.

She decided to not take the car right there and take the train with me as well as that guy.

On the train, the three of us are still talking as if the party isn't over. It's the guy's stop and he leaves, leaving this great blonde and I alone. We're still talking. Now it's my stop. She asks me if I think she'll be safe going to her place alone. "Well, you live in West Village right? You should be fine." It was something to that effect.

The next day I told my friend what happened and I've never seen him so mad. Every guy wanted this girl and I just threw it away without realizing it. Haven't seen her since.

6. From sonofgumbercules:

I was walking a girl back to her place after a date, chatting the whole time. When we got there(about 2 AM) she asked me if i wanted to spend the night. This went completely over my head. I thought she meant "it's late, so why don't you just sleep on my couch." I politely decline as my place is within walking distance. I give her a kiss goodnight and leave. About halfway down the block I realize what just happened and spent the whole trip home cursing myself.

7. From Thoras:

This is really painful for me, but here goes:

Around this time last year, I was at home at around 2:00 AM on a weekend during Spring Break of my senior year of High School. I was getting ready for bed when a good female friend of mine had called me completely out of the blue (we did talk a bit and there definitely was something between us, but I never did anything about it.) Anyways, this phone call comes out of nowhere and it's her asking if she can come over and spend the night.

Of course, I ask "Why?" and she says,

"Well I went to go hang out at a friends house, but it turns out they moved or something."

So I say "Well, that's weird. Why not just go home?"

Her: "Well, my parents have the security on so I can't get in the house."

Me: "Have you tried calling my sister? She's probably awake." (my sister is also a friend of hers and lives closer to where she was.)

Her: "I have, but she didn't answer."

Me: "Well, hmm, I guess you could come over here. I don't have a car at the moment, so you'd have to walk. Where are you at right now?

Her: "Location 2 1/2 miles away"

Me: "Directions to get to my house from there"

Her: "Cool, I'll see you soon. Bye."

So I figure that I'm not going to be able to go to bed anytime soon since I have to wait like 30 minutes for her to get here. I decide to start a game of Heroes of Newerth (big mistake, as a game lasts about 40+ minutes.) Anyways, she calls me about 15 minutes after she had hung up originally (which was odd at the time because the location she was at was much further away and so it should have taken much longer, but I didn't think too much of it.) I bring her inside, and she says something along the lines of "Well..." and I pretty much ignore her and sit right back down at my computer to finish my game.

She sits down on the floor about eight feet away from me for like 10 minutes before I realize "What the F*CK is wrong with me there is a girl I'm crazy for like 8 feet away that came to my house in the middle of the night under very strange circumstances." but by then it was too late. Anything that might have happened was destroyed by my stupidity. She was angry and ended up sleeping on the floor even when I offered her my bed. Oh well. We did end up dating like a month after this happened but nothing ever happened there (and there's also another story about my stupidity in there too!) I'm pretty sure of all the things I've fucked up in my life, nothing compares to my relationship with said girl.

I've told my close friends of this encounter and asked them if I was correct in believing that it was some sort of booty call or anything that I could have capitalized on. They, very politely, laughed their asses off at my obliviousness and reminded me that this is why I was a virgin at 18.

8. From ReigninLikeA_MoFo:

I was talking to a girl at a bar about my love of cooking. She says, "why don't you come to my place and fix (yes fix) me a cheese omelet?" I did. Then I left. I needed to "get home." She was cute. :/

9. From north_side:

So I'm doing the door at a Nightclub on NYE when 2 German backpacker girls come past and ask what's happening later.

I tell them its dancing, champagne and general revelry.

Later in the night they show up. I get them drinks throughout the night. Keep a general eye on them, including watching random men hit on them. When I ask them why they aren't hooking up, they both answer with 'We are waiting for you.'

Girls show a lot of patience as I do have to work in between snippets of chatting to them.

Eventually, the club closes, more drinks are consumed. Eventually, its time to go somewhere else.

"Where do you want to go now" I ask.

"Anywhere but a techno club" one answers.

Group of workers, the two German backpacker girls and me rolls out of club to TECHNO club (group decision) about 4am.

5am and girls are nowhere to be found.

Turn to mate and ask him if he has seen the girls and he says "Dude I can't believe you, you just blew a surefire threesome".

Rewound the night in my head and yep, all signs pointed towards sex.

TL;DR Had chance at threesome with two German backpacker girls and missed all the signs.

10. From slumberparty_anyone:

I'm an exchange student, so one night I go out drinking with some friends from Canada and Australia. We're all going back to sleep at the same house, so the requisite "heh lul we're gonna have a foursome" jokes are being made.

We get sufficiently sh*ttered, get kicked out of several bars for making out on their tables, accidentally steal some beer glasses - standard drunk night.

Before we take a taxi back, we buy three bottles of red wine because GOD DAMMIT WE'RE NOT DRUNK ENOUGH. We get back, start chugging the wine, and try to watch a movie. But our drunk brains decide that hey, it would be a good idea to actually have a foursome. So I'm on the couch with the Australian, and my friend from America is on the other couch with the Canadian, when she drunkenly yell/slurs " PUT YOUR PENIS IIIIINN MUUUH MOOUUTH "

This results in insta-boner-kill because we're all laughing too hard, but it never comes back. Oh, we tried. I start going at it with the other girl right in front of him, pretty much smother him with my tits. The dog even tried to help and kind of licked his knee. But nope. No boner for jakucha.

So we did the only logical thing and passed the fuck out. No sex was had.

TL;DR Tried to have an international foursome, fell asleep.

11. From hertful:

I was on a second date with a girl I kind of liked. At the end of the night, I walked her home, and while standing outside her place she literally pulled me into her apartment. Within 30 seconds we were on her bed cuddling as she made me feel her upper arm, where she had one of those implanted birth control rod-shaped thingamajigs (Wikipedia tells me they're called Implanon in the US).

I was a bit freaked out by this thing under her skin, and asked "What the hell is that?!". She explained, and I said "ok" and continued the cuddling. After 30 minutes she told me I should probably go home. I did, and now I'm sitting here 3 years later finally understanding what happened that night.

12. From Alymae:

I was like in grade 11 or so around 16 and this girl I knew/secretly had a crush on even though I was dating someone already (who was an a*s and never treated me right) dragged me back to her house on her bed in her room like every day for a week saying she was upset about her ex leaving her or something. I was pretty attracted to her but questioning my sexuality.

I say this because she was a lesbian and we were both chicks. I was too quiet and shy to do anything...even though it was all I could think of when I was there...chicks can be oblivious too! :c

TL;DR: Lesbian totally begging for rebound sex but I was too shy/oblivious to do anything about it.

13. From TehCyberJunkie:

This chick I'd had a mad crush on all through highschool came over to my grandparent's house with me one late afternoon to enjoy some evening pool fun times. We'd never been 'intimate' in any shape or form, not really even any hints at it, just really chill friends. The evening was a little more heated than usual for two reasons though: 1) I had no shame in commenting on how amazing she looked in her bikini (she's got no self-esteem) and 2) her boyfriend of almost a year just up and disappeared two months earlier; no calls, no notes, no last words.

It gets late as fu*k, her house was about an hour round trip for me and I was her only ride from there, so I asked her if it was cool if she just slept over. She excitedly agrees, and so I told her about the second bed in my room that she can use, then we trod upstairs and turn in for the night. We have the fun late night conversations to-and-fro each others' bed, then I made a funny comment about how my bed's got an egg-crate cushion that hers doesn't and is much more comfy because of it.

Next thing I know, she jumps in my bed, which is a twin-sized bed so it was both of us practically nude and now spooning. This thought now rages through my mind "I'm now spooning the object of my fantasies for nearly 5 years HHHHHNGFGFF". I have the "I don't know what to do with my hands" problem and just kinda...wrap them around her and then try not to do anything weird because she's friendzoned me for years.

What seemed like hours later, I finally gathered the courage to kiss her on the back of the neck, and she responds by grabbing my hand that was wrapped around her, taking it to her lips, and nibbling on the tip of my thumb. Not knowing what the f*ck just happened, I just kind of froze for a bit, and then she took over by rolling over and making out with me while rubbing one out on my thigh.

Sexytimes, but no sex, ensued until the sun came up. I got up to go and take a shower, and I jokingly suggested that this shower was big enough for two people. Wouldn't you know it, she joins me after I've been in for about a minute, and I can see her in her completely naked glory. A sight which is still vivid in my wankbank today. We start making out and it gets really saucy again, and I started getting woozy. Like, really woozy.

I had the hot water of the shower cranked up to almost max, like I always do, and then suffered from a massive heatstroke. I got out of the shower and stumbled down the stairs to the tile and just laid on the cold stone for a bit until she came down and joined me. I promptly took her home afterward.

Her boyfriend showed up the next day, he'd just gotten out of prison for beating a man within an inch of his life for stealing his car. We never had sexy times again.

14. From lostintime2004:

So a few years back, a girl I had a mad crush on in high school messaged me over Myspace wanting to hang out (it had been a few years). Now this girl was always a goodie goodie, with a large chest, but always covered up, dressing modest. Now I get there and she is wearing booty shorts, a black bra, and a see-thru tank top.

As the night progresses, we get in a tickle fight. Fast forward a little, she is telling me how she likes it in bed. Fast forward to 1:30am. I mention how its late, and I should be heading home. She says "You can stay here tonight if you want." Me being the anti captain obvious, say "Nah I can make it home"

She begs me for an hour to stay, and I am STILL not getting the idea, and leave. It all clicks about halfway home, and I did NOT turn back like the idiot I am.

TL:DR They say we don't do subtle, we also dont do f*cking obvious either.

15. From alexm5488:

First night at my new university (this is in 2008), I go out with some friends to a nearby bar. We're hanging out, nothing major happening. I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. On my way back to my friends, this hot drunk girl grabs me out of nowhere and says, "Take me home!" Though surprised and momentarily caught off-guard, of course I said yes and off we went.

The walk took about 10 mins, and when we got to her porch, we started making out.

Annnnnd that's where the story ends. She just gave me her number, said good night and went inside before I even had the chance to say anything.

16. From ItsPrisonTime:

Guy Here. Here's a magical school bus moment for you all. I work at a software engineering company. The days do get very long and strenuous. What do I do to relax? I jerk off. I go to the Men's Restroom on a totally different floor. It makes me feel like I'm on a different world altogether, it's awesome...500 days of summer type sh*t. Long story short... I was in the stall and had french porn on my iPad...good ol Milka Manson, my go-to gal... and was about to climax.

When some girl, blonde, blouse and skirt, and attractive came in and opened up the door...she just stood there and started nodding her head...and said...do you need a hand? I blew my load all over my damn iPad, looked at her with utter horror. Oh god...and then ran out of the restroom...I just heard " What the f*ck " in the distance as I left. Came back to my desk with semen all over me. Just sat there in f*cking awe of what happened.

The look on her face...I'd never forget. Like she's been in that situation before, perfectly unfazed. I've been looking for her ever since, never saw her again. GOD DAMN IT. She must've been an auditor or guest. F*CK. She was most likely serious about it. The odds of that happening again? Never. Why did she go in the men's restroom? No f*cking clue. Two years ago to this day. It took like half a year to get over my stupidity. I lol at it now. Whatever.

TD;LR : Always wanted to walk in on a girl masturbating and say "you need a hand?" When it happens to me...I f*cking run away like a little b*tch.

17. From ImNotJesus:

Mine isn't as dramatic but it's fairly painful. In a hotel room with a girl I liked and a bunch of friends. Me and her were on a bed together, alone and the friends all leave us alone. We're on the hotel room bed for about 2 hours (after midnight) watching TV and cuddling and I never made an attempt to kiss her. To this day, I have no idea why.

18. From girraween:

I had a thing for this girl at work. She was blonde and had a sleeve tattoo, in my mind very hot. After a missed opportunity where she took me out clubbing after my girlfriend and I broke up (she practically told me afterward that she wanted to corrupt me), I saw her for the last time when we went to the movies.

She was moving away and a day before she flew out she invited me to the movies. Something she has never done. So I picked her up from my place, she complimented me on how I looked. Things went well, I dropped her off. This is where it went pear-shaped. We were talking in my car and I swear she wanted me to kiss her. I wasn't sure, but I felt she hinted at it during the day.

Nothing happened. She went inside her house. I'm kicking myself because I'm suddenly picking up on the hints she dropped. But I can't be sure. I drove away. My head kept telling me to go back, that she dropped hints! So I drove back, thinking I'd make a great entrance. I made sure I looked okay and knocked on the door.

Nothing. I knock again. Nothing. I step back to look at the house. I eventually get in my car. I thought she could have been in the shower or something. So I sent her a message saying that I came back, and that I wanted to kiss her. I thought being bold would do the trick. She never replied.

19. From Lihiro:

This is a story that happened on New Years Eve 2011, which perfectly summates exactly the kind of year 2011 had been - this is the story of the two french maids:

Shortly prior to midnight in a bar/club in my hometown, I'm out with my three best mates in the world (2 guys, 1 girl) in the club section going through a hearty amount of rum to bring in the new year. I'm approached by a reasonably attractive lady wearing a french maid costume, black dress, black shoes, long socks, the lot. Her more attractive friend sat behind her in the same attire as she approached me, and took both my hands in hers. My drink was already placed on the divider.

She leant up to my ear; "Excuse me, is that my drink?" she asked with a smile, hinting towards my rum.

Knowing she was wrong, I laughed nervously and politely replied "Haha, I'm sorry but I think that's actually mine..."

She laughed too and continued; "Oh I guess someone else must've taken my drink!" whilst still smiling, she looked away with my hands in hers.

"Well, that's a real shame. What were you drinking? I'm drinking rum and coke." I state, trying to identify the reasoning of her accusation - not in a greedy sense, but a curious one.

She laughed slightly towards her friend who pressed her with a hand motion and raised eyebrows to continue her inquiry, for all I could assume. "Rum and coke too, actually!" she smiled again.

"Oh right." I stop, contemplate the possible likelihood that the drink I literally had placed on the divider could have possibly been hers. In a split second I estimated the probability of my inebriation, I, multiplied by my memory failing, m, divided by the probability of me accidentally usurping this poor lady's drink. After calculating im/P20 I simply responded:

"I'm really sorry but I really don't think this is the drink you're looking for. Someone must've taken it." There was a moment of ironic silence in the pervasively loud club.

"Have a good night though!" I followed up, just so I didn't seem like an a*s.

I am the worst single man in existence.

TL;DR: French maid pulls the "is that my drink?" line on me, I take it literally.

20. From cthulhu_zuul:

This is a long story, so I'm going to bullet-point it:

• Girl and I are friends for nearly five years

• Only ever talk over AIM

• Back and forth attraction over five year's time

• Freshman year of college, we're at the same uni

• She gets out of a bad relationship

• We're both in the right place and time to get in a relationship with each other

• Both go to a Christmas party for our gaming group, afterwards she comes back to my dorm room and we just talk for about 8 hours

• Next day make a movie night

• Watch District 9

• Sit on bed, awkwardly

• Aw shit, we're on our backs

• Talkin' about relationships

• Kiss her

• She kisses back, then says it was weird

• She doesn't express interest beyond that

• Walk back at 4 in the morning

• Manage to fuck up every aspect of romance over the course of three weeks

• Oops

• Bluest balls ever

A dad is asking if he's wrong to demand that his daughter puts in writing that she will get her face tattoos removed in order to move back into his house.

The daughter lost her mom at a young age and has struggled with addiction, and her father seems worried about how tattoos could influence his two younger daughters or make it difficult to start anew.

He wrote:

My daughter is 19, we have two more children at home, 14 and 10, all girls.

My daughters mother passed (drug overdose) when she was 2 years old. I met my current wife when my daughter was 3.

Daughter started acting out her first year of highschool, started using drugs. We sent her to rehab, tried multiple things to help her. She ended up leaving home at 16, moved across the country to Los Angeles (we live in Atlanta). To make a long story short, she lived really wild and loose for a while, and eventually the real world got to her. She straightened up a bit, got her GED got a decent job and a shared apartment.

After losing her job, she's hoping to move back home, but her father has put forth some conditions:

She recently lost her job, as did two of her roommates. She can’t afford to live LA anymore and would like to come back home. My wife is ecstatic. She’s talking to her daily, they’re making big plans for her to come back. I want her to show me she is ready to change her life before coming back home. During the years she has been gone she has gotten THREE facial tattoos. An om, symbol between her eyebrows, 666 on the left side or her face, and 999 on the right side. If she is going to come back I want her to agree to remove the tattoos. I will pay for it. She can stay here rent and responsibility-free as she figures out what she wants to do as long as she does this. She and my wife are upset about it.

The stepmom disagrees with the ultimatum.

My wife thinks I’m being an a**hole because we should be welcoming her back with open arms after all of the work she has done to get her life together at this young age. She thinks we should get her into therapy, address her trauma, etc. I think these are all great ideas, but I also think that the tattoo removal is necessary. I don’t want my other girls to think that these tattoos are acceptable (they are at an impressionable age and my 14 year old daughter definitely thinks her sister is the coolest person on the planet). I think it would be better to start with a fresh slate, and it would prove to me that she is ready to leave that lifestyle behind. Plus Atlanta is not like Los Angeles, although we live in the city, people are not going to be open to hiring someone with tattoos on their face for the most simple jobs.

TLDR: I want my daughter to put it in writing that she will remove the tattoos on her face before I will allow her to move back in, and my wife thinks I’m an asshole for robbing her of her expression during her time of need. AITA?

People on Reddit agreed with the wife, declaring the dad to be The A**hole here.

Some say that the ultimatum is even counter-intuitive. "Drawing this line isn't going to help her. It's going to make her feel like all her progress was for nothing if HER OWN FATHER can't accept her," INTJedi explained.

"I actually am on your side regarding facial tattoos in general, but you're not being entirely realistic," wrote Arawn_of_Annwn. "I don't know if it's out of ignorance or callousness or what, but... Removing tattoos isn't easy. Or fast."

Members of the jury went as far as calling the dad stupid.

"You sort of played herself here," ElizaCat9 commented. "If she is changing and getting her life together, this is something she may have been thinking about doing anyway. Instead of letting her stay and, after awhile, while talking about jobs or life changes, offering to pay for their removal if she wants, you gave her an ultimatum. You won't get that chance back. It's not your choice, but you weren't even just TA (The A**hole) about it, you were stupid, too.

If the visible face tattoos were an absolute dealbreaker, this dad probably would have been better off just asking his daughter to get bangs.

We really don't deserve dogs. They're cute, give us unconditional love, and make us laugh. These dog memes will tickle your funny bone and warm your heart. What could be better?

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Giving a class or work presentation can be incredibly anxiety-inducing if you're someone who crumbles at the thought of public speaking.

Working on a group project presentation in school can always be a bit of a nightmare of scheduling, balancing out the workload, and awkwardly stumbling through poorly written slides while trying not to talk over each other. Giving a presentation alone, however, can also be a sweaty-palmed, speed-talking rambling session, and if technological difficulties crop up then it only makes matters a whole lot messier. Sure, there are always a few students of co-workers that seem to seamlessly nail the art of presentations with poise and grace, but for most of us, they're dreaded mornings of stress-filled terror, frozen computer screens, or Freudian slips.

So, when a Reddit user asked, "What funny/embarrassing things have you seen during a presentation?" people were ready to share the moments of personal and secondhand embarrassment that haunt all of their public speaking moments.

1.

I had a friend who was very shy. She started a video presentation, when some softcore porn started. She screamed, turned it off and started crying. I found out later it was intentional, she just hadn't finished her presentation and needed a way out. Worked too, since the teacher let her do it later. - Tapeworms

2.

a kid in one of my human resource classes cited The Onion during a presentation... - ThankYouBasedGod1017

3.

I was in a car accident on the way to giving a presentation in class. I felt good enough to decline an ambulance ride and I didn't want to deal with rescheduling the presentation, but my head didn't feel quite right. Fast forward an hour, I'm in the middle of my speech in front of the class when I start leaking brain juice out of my nose. It literally filled my cupped hands with clear fluid and I just stood there not knowing what to do before stammering "I had an accident". I'll never forget the looks of horror. - kmack

4.

One time in history class during highschool we were reading as a class. When my turn came up I pronounced "Jesus and his gentiles" as "Jesus and his genitals". - 123fakerusty

5.

One day in my middle school biology class, a girl was doing a presentation about single-celled organisms... or "single-celled orgasms" as she called them. She screwed that up 3 or 4 times and it was increasingly funny each time. Our teacher was laughing too so there was no stopping it, and the presenter was so embarrassed that after a few times, we'd know when she was approaching the word on her note cards because she would take a pause to try her hardest to not say "orgasm" again. - manny_ plaquiao_dds

6.

Back in grade 8 our class had to do speeches on various topics. Pretty boring, standard stuff. This one kid gets up there to do his speech and his opening line is, "What's long, hard, and full of semen?"

"...If you guessed a submarine, you're right!"

The teacher wasn't really even paying attention until she heard that gem come out of his mouth. - Leesarr

7.

In middle school a kid was telling a story about how he had encountered a "man of war" while swimming. He said "and then I saw this really long testicle floating on the top of the water.."

Everyone, even my sexy as hell science teacher started laughing.

He really didn't know they were called "tentacles"... which to me was even more funny. - Sabbatai

8.

In my aircraft performance class a kid was giving a presentation of some early jet and mentioning how the ejector seat would malfunction and activate when it wasn't supposed to, but his words came out

"the ejaculation seat had a problem of going off prematurely". - SpaceCowboy58

9.

The night before I gave a presentation, my ex changed the background on my computer to a nude picture of herself in a sexy pose and shut down my computer. So, I go into the class, hook up the projector and start up my computer. Up pops the picture of her fully exposed on screen for the entire class to see. Oh, I forgot to mention. She was in the class and sitting in the front row.

She thought I did it on purpose. - solinv

10.

Sometimes my professor accidentally puts pictures of her goat in her powerpoints. - Retawekaj

11.

Last few days of chemistry class, and we had to give individual ten minute presentations on something chemistry-related, no doubt. In the lunch break between, my friends decide they want to smoke out in their car. I'd already finished my presentation, so I decide to join them.

I go back to class, not knowing that one of those guys was up next. If it's not completely obvious that he's baked out of his mind, he makes it so by stopping mid-sentence every two minutes or so to stare longingly into the light of the projector, and then letting out a giggle after every observation.

He aced the presentation. - ArrenPawk

12.

in junior year of high school, my friend had to do a paper for spanish class, i forget what it was for, but he wrote it the night before in english, translated it on freetranslation.com, and handed it in the next day. he got it back about a week later with an f on it and he had to redo the paper. at first we all thought it was because of how poorly those websites translate full sentences and whatnot, but it turned out he translated it into french instead of spanish - patty_d_27

13.

Back in college, about 3 years ago, one of my fellow students was giving a presentation to our class of about 25 people. To be honest, I don't really remember what his speech was about, but he had a short video clip to support his argument at the end. With the Professor's laptop and projector set up at the front of the room, the student inserts his USB Flash drive. He proceeds to click "Play" and walks to go to dim the classroom lights for maximum visibility. He wanted to make sure there was no glare for students in the back of the room.

The movie starts and slowly fades from black...

Then it begins.

Moaning. A naked girl is on the screen pleasuring herself.

The presenter now realizes he just clicked on the WRONG FILE and scurries to the computer to quickly shutdown the video simultaneously saying "Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God" about 17 times. I remembered looking around and everyone was in complete shock as to what was happening. The presenter finally gets the movie to close out and doesn't say a word as he heads straight to his desk in embarrassment.

The class uproars in laughter and the Professor, an elderly man in his 70's, who hadn't said a thing as this unfolded, now chuckles and says, "I need a copy of that after class!" - AznJsn

14.

The other day my business ethics teacher was discussing basic logic concepts, using P and Q as satisfying conditions for one another.

At some point she said that some condition "satisfies the Q-ness", and then proceeded to say "satisfies the P-ness". Then she paused, looked horrified, and said "that was terrible". - LobsterThief

15.

I had a student who wanted to hook her laptop up to the projector to do her Humanities presentation for me. When everything got booted up, her desktop wallpaper was tiled with the phrase "Eat my p*ssy now!" I told her I didn't think that would be appropriate as the rest of class was howling with laughter. She looked at me kind of confused and then saw the screen behind her. To state that she was mortified would be an understatement. And yes, I still made her give her presentation to the class. - Ominus666

16.

My Italian teacher commonly has spelling mistakes in her slides for class. We were reading stories in english then translating the verbs to the appropriate tense. She scrolls down and the title says "The Art of Fisting" instead of "The Art of Fishing". Laughs were had. - MEtaphorOWl

Even if you were the most chilled out bride in the world, would you accept an engagement ring that was previously used for an acquaintance's failed relationship?

One man is asking whether he's the a-hole in the situation after his girlfriend refused to accept his buddy's old engagement ring. She thinks it's inappropriate and he thinks she's throwing a "hissy fit," so he took to the internet for adjudication.

He has been paying plenty of attention to his girlfriend's aesthetic wishes:

I’m sad that she’s upset with me. I thought this was what she wanted.

My gf (fiancée?) had given me lots of hints that she loved a specific diamond cut and that she wanted a solitaire on platinum for her engagement ring. If you have ever looked into this, you know these carry a hefty price tag, especially for good quality diamonds.

And it turns out his friend bought the exact ring she wanted, but his engagement didn't work out:

Fortunately I have a good buddy who is loaded. Unfortunately for him, his 2-year engagement did not work out in the end and his ex returned the engagement ring to him. It’s a gorgeous diamond solitaire set on a platinum ring that is exactly the style that I have been looking at. He was too sentimental to just return it. I told him I was looking for something exactly like that (but a lot cheaper).

He bought it from his friend for a small fee:

He wanted to see the ring put to good use and would have given it to me for free (!!) if I thought my gf would love it. I told him FOR SURE she would because this is the style and quality she drools over all the time. But I felt weird taking it for free, so I offered to “buy” it from him for a fifth of the cost, which is what I would be comfortable paying for an engagement ring anyway.

His girlfriend loved the ring, but then asked where it came from:

So when she accepted the proposal, she died over how beautiful the ring was. Then she asked me where I bought it since she wanted to find out whether she can get the band resized at the same jeweler as a complimentary service (it was just a little big on her ring finger).

He spilled the beans about the ring's origins:

That’s when I told her I got the ring from my buddy for a really good deal and that I would ask him where he got the ring, since he was going to get the certificate for me anyway. For some reason, she got really upset at me. I told her it was a really good deal and it shows I’m really good with finances. I told her it is certified and legit. I also reminded her lots of couples use vintage rings and free family heirlooms. Wasn’t it the thought that mattered most?

She isn't happy about it at all and he doesn't understand why:

Anyway, the more I write about this, the angrier I’m getting that she is having a hissy fit about this. Am I the a**hole for getting a high quality, certified diamond solitaire for a really good price??

My gf (fiancée) is angry that I bought an authentic, high quality, certified diamond engagement ring from a friend at a very good price. Am I the a**hole though?! I don’t understand where she is coming from and she won’t talk to me.

The people of the internet have many different opinions on this, but most agree that both parties' actions and reactions are understandable.

postteenagebtch says no one did anything wrong:

You’re right, you didn’t do anything necessarily wrong. You tried to do what she wanted. However, it is very common for people to feel uneasy about buying rings from failed marriages. It’s not like an heirloom ring where it came from someone important. It’s a symbol of y’all’s future that is already a symbol for someone else’s failure of a future. You just need to talk to her. Apologize. You obviously didn’t intend to hurt her and she needs to know that.

grrrrarrrgh agrees:

For a lot of people the history of a ring/stone matters. While you are just focused on the value and quality of the piece, she's dealing emotionally with a ring that comes from a failed relationship and what that represents. It's not a vintage ring or a family heirloom. It's a recent cast-off from your buddy's broken engagement.

They continue:

It seems acknowledging the emotional side of this ring's story is a pretty important part of understanding where your gf might be coming from. This ring is supposed to be a symbol of your commitment to her - not just a pretty bauble. And in her mind, the symbol of your relationship that you chose was your friend's break up.

Have a conversation.

But CatWhoLovesPlants thinks the girlfriend is being unrealistic:

TBH, I would hate to wear a ring that belonged to someone else, failed marriage or not, but I feel the gf is being TA here. Logically, one should desire for things that is within their financial reach. OP mentioned that he wouldn't have been able to buy the kind of ring she desired at full price. She needs to decide what matters more to her, a new ring or a ring that satisfies her criteria.

YourDadsATruckDriver points out very few people want their engagement ring's main selling point to be that it was a "good deal":

I don't think you understand what she's actually upset about. It is the thought that matters most. She wants a ring that you thoughtfully picked out for her because of how much you love her - not one you got because it was a good deal.

They continue:

And it's not an heirloom, or vintage. It's a used ring that was returned because of a broken engagement.

NAH at this point, but I do think you made a mistake in talking to her about what a good deal you got.

bad_armenian_juju sums it up well:

There's a reason why a lot of women love wearing a family heirloom remembering "this was my grandmother's they were happily married til the day they died."

instead her story is "my guy got a good deal shopping in the graveyard of other people's broken dreams"

Livvylove agreed:

If she thinks the ring is cursed with bad juju it's not a good deal in her mind. I'm semi superstitious and I personally would rather have a cheaper ring or even a ring pop than one from a failed relationship.

So there you have it. For many people, a "good deal" isn't as important as good energy.

Maybe they can get the ring saged or something...?

Friend breakups can be just as painful as losing a romantic relationship, but they're not talked about nearly as much.

A recent Reddit thread asked people to share the final straw that made them end a relationship with their best friend. The responses prove that there's nothing wrong with walking away from a bad friend.

1. Has this friend never heard of Ashley Madison?

He married a woman whose upbringing had resulted in her being repulsed by physical contact and sex in general. To try to fill the void in his life, he made a pass at my wife. I have not talked to him since she told me what he did. - fredzout

2. This is definitely a sue-able offense.

He promised me he would pay my rent with our business profits while I went out of town but instead bought a truck with our money and told my landlord that I had the money but refused to pay. My family ended up homeless - ryanhedden1

3. Good riddance.

Ditching me for a better something for the 100th time while I waited outside a concert with his ticket. - Hard_as_it_looks

4. What is even the point of this?

I ended my friendship with a friend because she decided to go to a music festival without me despite me literally asking her if she wanted to go and her saying she didn't want to because of XYZ. People suck. - BritPetrol

5. What a wake-up call.

Whether we spoke or hung out was fully dependent on me initiating it. So when I decided to step back, we stopped talking

for some context, by the time we stopped talking, it was the end of high school and we had both become completely different from each other, so this wasn’t sudden. i think i tried to hang on to the friendship simply because it was the longest one i had, which unfortunately wasn’t reciprocated - amy4947

6. Horrifying.

When my dad was dying of stage four cancer, she just smiled and said, "I didn't like him anyway."

Like, in the same room as him. He was awake and it was one of the last things he ever heard.

Our friendship had been really codependent and unhealthy for years, but that was the sentence that made me realize that she wasn't just edgy and kind of cold, she was actually a bad person. I only met up with her one time after that (for closure). - sleepylittlesnake

7. At least these two crazies have each other.

She helped my ex break into my email to prove I was cheating on him. Spoiler alert: I wasn’t. - rawrhtx

8. That's messed up.

He had a friend that stole from me. Defended the friend instead of backing me. At that point you might as well have carried the other side when he stole it. - H4nnibalB4rca

9. This stinks.

Realized I was the one keeping the friendship alive and she didn't really care. She's been passive aggressive and had lied and gaslighted in the past but she had become ruder and more dismissive lately and I was too angry with her to let it go. Looking back it was a long time coming. - ImaginaryNewspaper13

10. Some people just wear you down.

When I realized her childhood/family was too dysfunctional and she was taking her anger/frustration out on me since mine was not. She was always belittling me and talking over me and I just realized it wasn't worth it. She was funny and we liked the same things but if I spent more than 2 hours with her, I came home feeling worn down. - four2andnew

11. Sounds sad.

They became a meth addict and blamed everyone else for their problems. I tried everything I could to help them for over a year. I ruined a lot of my own life trying to be there for them. It was a hard lesson to learn that sometimes the people that you really love and care about are beyond help. It hurts to remember the person that she used to be and admit to myself that the person I knew is gone. - BareBearFighter

12. This sounds horrible.

She had a tendency of being selfish, while making me feel guilty that I was the selfish one. After spending my wedding day focused on her drama, I kept her at arms length. When the birth of my first child was also overshadowed by her drama, I cut her lose. Gaslighting is terrible. I still worry I’m being too self-centered. - AGrayBull

13. Wild.

I just broke up with my best friend for this exact same reason, except I’m pre-wedding. The whole day was already becoming about her and a majority of my planning was trying to mitigate her potential drama and crazy behaviour. She made a not so veiled pass at my fiancée recently and it suddenly occurred to me that I’ve been conditioned to let her do whatever she wants and not react. When I confronted her she gaslit as expected. The relief when I finally cut her off was incredible. - 2extraginge

14. It's hard to leave someone who clearly needs help.

I got sober and turned my life around, she wanted to stay in the same spot on her couch, pretend her issues didn't exist, and make someone else responsible for her sobriety. She was firmly entrenched in the belief she was a victim and couldn't comprehend being in charge of her own life. It got to the point I was having anxiety before I went to hang out with her and I couldn't take it anymore. - topazlacee

15. Definitely a blessing in disguise.

He ran off with my gf after swearing for weeks that he would never do such a thing. The best part was that I was best man at his wedding and he was married at the time. Honestly, looking back on it I'm glad it happened. I got to kick two pieces of s*** out of my life on the same day. I met my wife 2 years later and I've never been happier. - Techrob52

16. What a strange way to deal with romantic rejection...

Stole $400 from me when he found out the girl he liked actually liked me. We were in our mid-20s. High school never ends. - SuperFreakyNaughty

17. It's impossible to stay friends with someone like this.

She turned out to be a pathological liar. Lied about having an abortion, made it out to be my fault. Lied about the D-list celebrity she was dating, getting into Harvard, made a mutual friend believe I cock blocked her. Not only did I cut her off, but had to cut off our mutual friend because she continued to try to "fix" her. - MadP

18. Sounds like they were dealing with a lot.

Wouldn't come to my wedding even though he introduced my wife and I. Tried to explain to him there was nothing I wanted more other than for him to be there. His girlfriend at the time didn't want to go because she was insecure with her appearance.

We haven't seen each other since. My wife and I will be celebrating our 33rd anniversary soon. - GTO-farm

19. Ah yes, many of us have lost friends to the MLMs.

She never made time for me. She quit her job to be a fulltime "Lularoe Mom Boss" and apparently doesn't have time anymore. Truth be told, I miss her kids more. I hate it but I held on longer than I should have. I last saw her oldest daughter a year ago... I miss them so much. - Revekkasaurus

Good morning, comedy lovers. It's a good day to be alive and it's a great day to have a laugh. Check out this awesome list of memes. They are funny, silly, and all too relatable.

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Like the justice system in the outside world, the detention system in elementary schools often ensnare the innocent. In every class there are troublemakers, but there are also blameless kids who get caught in the crossfire.

Adults are sharing the stupidest reasons why they got detention in school as kids, and it's a charming throwback to a time when it felt that the biggest problem in your life was that your teacher was on a power trip that day.

1. A savage one-liner.

The way I walked to my chair... Teacher told me to walk correctly and I told her I was. Then I stuck my tongue out. I was in kindergarten. She turned my chair to the wall. Then I got in trouble again when she told me to turn back around and I said I'd rather look at the wall. -cynthiaapple

2. Mission accomplished.

I got suspended for not coming to school... like duh.. that’s what I wanted. -GoSuckYaMother

3. Wrong place at the wrong time.

Two kids got into a fist fight and I was given a detention because I was in close proximity to them when the fight started.

They even told the teacher I had nothing to do with it, but she didn't listen.

I've always referred to it as the proximity detention. -Samisoy001

4. You're funny. Funny looking.

A teacher once told me I “looked at her funny” in elementary school and my parents got a phone call saying that I had been “rude” to a teacher. I still, at 31 years old, have no idea what the fuck I did to piss this teacher off. -Moundhousedude

5. That bites.

I apparently ate carrots to loudly, got detention for EATING. -shdjdjdj

6. Too smart for your own good.

Back in middle I never got in trouble, except for this one time when I got my work done faster than everyone else, so I got sent to detention because the teacher thought I wasn’t doing anything.

The funny thing is when I arrived, even the administrator watching the detention students had a shocked look on their face because they would’ve never expected me in there. They ended up just telling me to go back to class 30 minutes later. -Crunchymemes_v1

7. Mrs. Harris is missing out.

String cheese.

Amazingly, my Kindergarten teacher never knew about this incredibly common food. So she kept me in for recess because I was "playing" with my string cheese.

I'm not going to bite into it like a barbarian Mrs Harris. -iBelieveInSpace

8. Synchronized sharpening.

I sharpened my pencil at the same time as somebody else. -urgentmilk

9. Should have said "Gesundheit."

Some one sneezed and I said bless you. Disrupting class- one hour detention. -Thisisnotmyname83

10. No exception for self-defense.

Was fighting back against people who were beating the sh*t out of me. -TheBeetle2

11. It's a slippery slope.

Sharpened a crayon in a pencil sharpener in 1st grade. Lost recess and the principal called my mom. Mom was NOT AMUSED, yelled at the principal for interrupting her work day for a minor offense, said that sharpening a crayon was hardly “the first step towards juvenile delinquency.” -Cordure

12. The teacher gotta catch 'em all.

Trading Pokemon cards in 8th grade. It was considered gang activity. Any group that had 5 or more people was considered a gang and banned. School was dumb. -Jiggly_Love

13. Collective punishment is illegal under the Geneva Convention.

The entire grade (sixty of us) got punished because two or three boys had been running down the street on our way back to school from an excursion, ringing random doorbells. We were all forced to stay after school for half an hour. -QuirkyPheasant

14. The Poky Little Puppy deserves your respect.

A guy in my chemistry class was making fun of people reading; he said books were stupid. I said, "Well, that's fair if the only thing you've read was The Poky Little Puppy."

Got pulled into the Assistant Principal's office the next day. I was told that just because you think something doesn't mean you have to say it. I still wonder how that comment escalated so fast. -hallipeno

15. The knee is too tantalizing.

Having a skirt that was “too short” when it was literally touching my knee. -beef_wallet

16. Slow clap.

A friend of mine got in trouble for clapping. Allegedly, he clapped exactly once, which obviously means sarcasm and that obviously means he was making fun of the teacher.

Funniest part? Nobody clapped. Teacher heard a noise, assumed it was a clap, assumed the last student to get into class was the one who clapped, assumed it mean making fun of her, and then sent the dude right to the principal's office.

She left the class in tears after none of us would take her authority seriously anymore. All the teachers were on her side telling us we did something horrible by making fun of her, and even the principal told us so at one point. -Zolotoy_I

17. Sounds like an honor, tbh.

People said I was racist for telling an Asian kid he had the personality of a SpaghettiO and I got a write up. -NotReels

18. Too much school spirit.

Got a detention slip in high school because I was wearing a sweatshirt WITH THE LOGO OF THE SCHOOL on it but it was “too big of a logo”. This is a catholic high school and apparently the rule is that the logo needs to be small and on the corner of the shirt (which there wasn’t a lot of school apparel like that anyway). I showed the Dean of students this because I’ve never gotten in trouble before, and he pretty much let me volunteer at some school function in order for me not to serve it. They changed the school apparel policy back to larger school logos after I graduated. -MoozCaow

19. Gesundheit.

I corrected the student teacher's pronunciation of a German word during a history class. He threatened to give me a referral and send me to the principal. -PatientFM

20. Had they never seen a picture of Jesus before?

I got in trouble for having long hair, at a catholic school, were the main person looks like a stoner who is not into drugs. -a_joke_for_life

21. The left hand is the devil's hand.

I got punishment for writing in left hand. I don't know why, she said to write at right hand and I couldn't so, I got to stand outside the class with my arms up till her class time ends. -ChillaX4NothinG

Some people firmly believe that children are more in tune with the supernatural, and many adults can remember strange things they saw or heard as kids that can't be easily passed off as the product of a "wild children's imagination" or "just an imaginary friend."

Whether or not you believe in ghosts, spirits or supernatural entities on Earth, there are definitely some things that children mention or describe every now and then that can give anyone some serious chills. While children, of course, often have some highly irrational fears of tentacled monsters in their closets or witches brewing evil spells under their beds, sometimes kids will casually describe the man in the corner of their room every night that just so happens to build steam engines, and things can get incredibly creepy. Is your kid a medium, or do they just have an overactive, highly-detailed imagination that perfectly designed an imaginary friend that coincidentally also has the same name as the previous tenant of your house who died there? We'll never know!

Still, most of us have at least one memory of an imaginary friend as a child. So, when a recent Reddit user asked, "Parents, what's the creepiest thing you remember about your child and an imaginary friend?" people were ready to share stories of their child's make-believe "play date" seriously freaking them out.

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My daughter had two imaginary friends when she was about 8. The first one's name was Lucy. Apparently she had asthma and one day we were driving in the car with the windows down. It was summer and the AC wasn't working so it was pretty hot. My daughter was sitting in the front seat and she said Lucy was sitting on the floor between her legs. All of sudden she's screaming and crying because Lucy had an asthma attack and died because she was so hot.

She got a replacement friend. Her name was Keeshe, and according to my daughter, she was Japanese and Jamaican. Well Keeshe was mean and she used to bite people so my daughter said she had to "get rid of her." Whatever that meant. - throwaway87290803

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My daughter used to chat away to nothing looking at the end of the bed. Quite some time later (months), she said she missed her friend. Asked her who she was talking about and she says the boy that used to sit and the end of her bed and talk to her.

She also knew the name of my cat who died before she was born and we are sure no one told her. - beardedshaun

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When my daughter was around 4 she had an imaginary friend named Jack that lived under our back porch. He liked to shove sticks down people's throats. I told her that maybe Jack wasn't the nicest person to hang out with!! - RyeDoll13

4.

My daughter had started having an imaginary friend named Riley shortly after we moved into an apartment. It was all cute until she told me he died because his mommy was a bad person. A few months later I met an upstairs neighbor who told me a few tenants ago there was a lady who killed her son named Riley. I had chills - discocherry9

5.

For years my son had an imaginary friend name Effie. Effie was a robot with a tail.

When he was probably 4 or so, he told us that Effie's mom had come for a visit. When I asked him what Effie's mom's name was, he thought for a minute, and responded matter-of-factly, "Mother Ef".

I nearly died of laughter. He had no idea that mother ef had actual meaning, to him it was a clever name he thought up all his own. - wellfellow007

6.

My daughter had a man who she called “ghost bob”. She said he hung out in the corner of her room.

My grandfather was named Robert, who I called Grandpa Bob. I was very close to him and he died of lung cancer when I was 13. - Shelbie007

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When my daughter was younger between 2-3 years old, she carried around a headless ken doll she put a dress on, she call him Louis. It’s the only toy she named, she didn’t know anyone named Louis, I don’t know where she got the name, or even decided to name the doll. - starcraft_al

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My kid had an imaginary friend named Kenya. She was a pretty great imaginary friend. One day, my daughter casually mentioned that Kenya is dead and likes to visit her. - mountaingoat05

9.

I have told this story before but the creepiest thing about my son’s imaginary friend was that he was so...lame. My son said he had a triangle as a head and square as a body and lived behind one of our chairs in “his apartment”.

His name was Gale and he always had problems at work and a boring job. Eventually he got married and had to work more because of his wife. They are eventually had three or four imaginary children and still lived lived in the tiny imaginary apartment. Gale kept his imaginary lame job and had to deal with his wife and kids.

I felt bad for the guy. - waterynike

10.

My son used to start screaming at night about a lady with dark curly hair in his room, he was about 4. He said she wanted to tickle him and kept telling him to relax. We assumed it was a recurring nightmare and brushed it off but then he started telling me he couldn’t go in the living room because she came out of the wall there during the day. It really started impacting our everyday life. We even asked a therapist about dealing with it but it still continued. A month or so later we moved (unrelated) and it stopped. I asked him about it casually so I wouldn’t freak him out and he said she was sitting on the floor in the hall outside our apartment door. She had asked him if she could come in and he said no. No more episodes after that. I don’t believe in the supernatural but that creeped me right out. - cellrdoor2

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My daughter and I were in the shed one day, she was about 4 at the time. We were just chatting etc. when I notice her looking over my shoulder, she looks back at me and says” daddy, who is the man standing behind you?” I look around quickly thinking I left the door open but it was shut. F*ck me, sent a massive chill down my spine! Not sure what she could see, but whatever it was, I couldn’t see it. - clarst16

12.

When my daughter was younger, she had an imaginary friend called Hunan Watjackson. He came with us everywhere for months. One day I asked her where he was. She informed me he tried to kiss her, so she sliced him with a knife and he was buried under our floor. - drivenbyyorcrippledby

13.

My son (then around 2) slept in bed with us for a while. Before he fell asleep he would ask me to tell the lady standing near our closet to go away and that she was bothering him. At first I kind of dismissed it but it kept happening so I started to ask ‘the lady’ to leave so my son could sleep. One night he replied that she said that she was there to keep him safe and watch him play. After that he started waking up almost every hour during the night, it went on for so long that I actually told ‘the lady’ to f*#k off. She never returned at night but he then started to talk to her during the day.

Shortly after he started telling me that I wasn’t his first mommy and that he wanted to see his other mommy. He kept asking for his other mommy and his brother (he only has a sister in ‘real life’). He is 5years old now and came to me the other day stating that he can remember what it looked like inside my tummy when he was still a tiny baby. He then went on to describe very realistic scenes and things that he heard while inside of me.

Don’t know if I should be creeped out or embrace his experiences. - Ailith9

14.

So my son was 3 years we moved to a new house.The first.day we are there he says to me

"Daddy met friend" i did not see anyone so i just said hello.Then later that night i saw my 3 year old over my bed with a knife i screamed "wtf" then he told me That his friend told him this was okay and "your daddy will be in a better place" i never ran so fast out of that f*cking house i went to the doctor to see if he had a mental illness of some sort he did not i went back to my moms house 10 years later and he says he does not have any memory of trying to kill me - reddit167909

15.

My daughter had an imaginary friend named 'Coby.' She got mad at him for writing his name on a piece of art. When she showed us this painting, which was typical 8-year-old 'kid' art, a big 'COBY' was scribed across the front. She said his 'family' then decided that he wasn't allowed to play with my kid anymore, and that was that. A few months later, she drew 'Coby's' family. They were clearly from the mid-1800's. This was about 6 years ago. Last year, we got her a new bed. While I was getting rid of the old one, I found 'COBY' scribble-etched into the frame on the wood between the points of contact of the frame and the box spring. I never said anything to my wife. - chadryk5

16.

My son told me he had an imaginary friend named pappy, and that pappy died “because he was really fat.” I found it funny mostly, but a little creepy. - soupday

The relationships between step-parents and their spouse's kids are often complex, and closeness requires mutual effort and open communication.

While it's ideal for a stepmom and her stepdaughter to immediately bond, things are rarely that simple, and controlling stepmom behavior is a surefire way to nip that possible connection in the bud.

In a recent post on the Am I The A*shole subreddit, a dad asked if he was wrong for not siding with his wife when she read his daughter's diary.

AITA For not siding with wife after she took my daughter's diary?

OP married his wife Nora this year, and his 12-year-old daughter Madison has been living with them the whole time.

Me M38 got married to my wife (Nora) F31 five months ago, My daughter (Madison) F12 from my previous marriage is currently living with me and my wife. My daughter is not on good terms with my wife, there is constant tension between the two even though my daughter has been very respectful and keeps to herself.

Unfortunately, there's been an ongoing tension between Nora and Madison, despite the fact that Madison is largely quiet and respectful.

My daughter Madison has a diary where she expresses her thoughts and feelings and writes about what bothers her without having to bother anyone with listening. It's her choice to do that and I respect her wanting her own space.

Last week, the tension came to a head when Madison called OP crying because Nora stole her diary and refused to give it back.

Last week, while I was at work, Madison called me and she was crying, she told me that her stepmom took her diary and read through it, and refused to give it back, she said she wanted me to come home immediately.

When OP got home, they were both in a screaming match, and Nora denied stealing the diary from Madison.

I got home to find Nora and Madison having a screaming match, I asked what was going on and Madison told me that her stepmom snooped around in her room, took her diary and refused to give it back, Nora denied and said she had no idea what my daughter was talking about.

I asked my daughter to confirm it but she didn't she just kept saying her stepmom took it, and must've hid it cause it was gone that morning.

When OP found the diary in their bedroom later, he gave it back to Madison and lied about where he found it, he then confronted Nora.

Nora said she didn't do it, I got stuck I didn't know what to do, my daughter told me to look for it, I started looking thinking she might've forgotten where it was, And I was surprised to find it in our bedroom, I gave Madison her diary back and lied about where I found it, I secretly confronted Nora about it, but she broke down and said that I was supposed to comfort and support her because she read the awful stuff Madison said about her in her diary.

After being confronted, Nora broke down and said she was reeling from awful things Madison wrote about her.

I told her she was in the wrong for taking Madison's diary in the first place and cause an issue.

She got mad at me and went on about how she was treated and how I was supposed to defend her from this much hate and resentment.

I walked out of the bedroom, Nora stayed there all day and refused to eat dinner, I brought her dinner upstairs but she refused to take it.

Nora got angry at OP for calling her out, and claimed he was supposed to defend her from Madison.

I bought Madison a small box to keep her important stuff in so she won't lose them.

In an attempt to spread peace, OP bought Madison a special box where she can keep her diary, but Nora and Madison still refuse to talk to each other.

Madison and Nora don't even talk to each other I don't know if I handled this situation properly my wife is so pissed at me and disappointed that she's hurting and I didn't do anything to make it right.

likewhatevertho thinks OP was TA for lying to Madison about where he found her diary, and ultimately thinks he should break things off with Nora.

NTA for the question posed, but I do think Y T A for essentially gaslighting Madison by lying about where you found the diary and then getting her a box so she doesn’t “lose” things. Madison correctly believed your wife had STOLEN from her, which she HAD, and you chose to invalidate this reality, presumably to try to not cause even more damage to their fractured relationship. This wasn’t for Madison’s sake since she clearly already dislikes and distrusts Nora (rightfully so, it would seem), this was so that you could keep both ~women you love~ in your life and on good terms rather than tell Madison the truth that she was right and have to deal with further fall-out. Making your daughter think she was wrong that she had been stolen from and that she had wrongfully accused Nora unfairly is NOT good parenting.

I would have to think long and hard if I wanted to stay married to someone who treats my 12-year-old in such a way as to warrant my child to write about her negatively in that diary... only to have my wife STEAL it, LIE to my daughter, LIE to ME, and then expect my sympathy for their abominable behavior, going so far as to say that you should side with her over your own child.

Lol no wait I wouldn’t think long and hard, I would protect my child & divorce that wife immediately ☺️❤️🤦‍♀️

EDIT: OP, if you read this you’ll find a TON of comments under it, most reiterating what I said, and probably too many for you to read. BUT I HIGHLY recommend you scroll through and find the comments from all the stepchildren talking about the relationships (or lack thereof) they now have with the parents who didn’t stand up for them enough to make them comfortable in their own homes and chose instead to enable their new spouses. Whether I’m able to convince you or not, you should take the time to read the accounts people shared, to at least understand the road you’re setting up for your future relationship with Madison.

fistulatedcow doesn't understand how OP can justify a relationship with Nora when she behaves this way.

I just don’t understand how parents can be comfortable marrying someone who gets along terribly with their child(ren). Especially when the stepparent is actively doing things that are contributing to the conflict (like reading a diary). Maybe this is just my aromanticism speaking, but seriously are people THAT eager to get married that they can ignore such harmful family dynamics? Like for f*ck’s sake go to family therapy first.

jess8771 has been in Madison's shoes and thinks OP should seriously reevaluate Nora's place in the family.

This. OP, I was your daughter, and at 33 I still have moments of trauma from my stepmother. She passed away when I was 19 and I am just now dealing with it after over a decade of feeling like I couldn't speak ill of the dead. I love my dad, but I always wonder if we'd have such a great relationship if she were still alive.

I should say that I loved her too in my own way, but she didn't give me privacy or freedom and caused a lot of pain in my childhood.

DogsWatchr echoed others by saying that OP shouldn't have lied on behalf of Nora.

NTA for the question you posed. Y T A for lying to your daughter about where you found it and, not confronting your wife for her behavior. You stated in your post that your daughter is always respectful. It seems the bad behavior and tension is primarily from your wife. She is the adult, your daughter is the child. The onus is on your wife to be the adult and work on her relationship with your daughter. If you decide to remain in a relationship with her, go to counseling. It seems like your wife has some real insecurities in regards to her place within your family.

It's clear that Nora has a toxic way of interacting with Madison, and if OP wants either relationship to continue, serious changes need to be made.

Ever wondered exactly how petty your neighbors are? Well if you haven't already then you may want to join NextDoor.com, a popular website for neighbors to post or request services, ask or offer help to those living in their neighborhood, and often just air out their hilariously petty grievances.

The "Best of NextDoor" Twitter account collects and shares the craziest, funniest and pettiest posts from people's neighbors across the country. In times like these, there's a lot of joy to be had in connecting with, and silently mocking, the people in our communities.

Here are 19 of summer 2020's funniest and pettiest posts shared by people's neighbors on NextDoor:

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Gen Z has been brutally roasting Millennials and Boomers on TikTok and Twitter for awhile now, and Millennials are finally gently defending themselves...

Between the "Ok, Boomer" meme and the "dog mom coffee-drinking, wine-obsessed Harry Potter freaks" Millennial discourse, nobody is safe from Gen Z's generational teasing. While Gen Z thinks that Millennials need to seriously grow up, abandon their obsession with a child wizard, and stop using their love of wine and saying "doggo" as a "whole personality," Gen Z is also the generation of TikTok dancing from their parents' mansions and eating Tide Pods. There are plenty of things that Millennials simply just don't get about Gen Z from their snap-messaging as a main form of communication to their love of lip-syncing and wasting food for social media purposes.

So, to encourage equal-opportunity roasting between generations, here are the funniest tweets from Millennials about the behavior of Gen Z.

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Adulthood has its downsides—like having to pay bills, go to work every day, and hurting your neck from yawning. But one thing I don't miss about childhood is the minefield of potential embarrassment and shame, much of which took place in school. Every kid experiences a humiliating moment (or two, or a thousand, or more) during their school years. At the time, it feels like we may never recover. And tthough kids are resilient and they do bounce back, we often do carry the shame of these memories with us well into adulthood.

Someone asked Reddit: "what was your most horrifying moment in school?" These 18 people share the most horrifying and embarrassing memories from school that they'll never be able to live down:

1.) From etm124:

Mine happened on the first day of the 6th grade. Back then, probably THE most important decision a newly graduated 5th grader has to make during the summertime is what he/she will wear the very first day of 6th grade. In my area, 6th grade meant the beginning of Middle School. Middle school meant, a la carte lunches, dreaded showers after gym, and 8th grade girls. The first day in a new school could seal your fate for the rest of the school year; and what is one of the most important decisions I was going to make? What I was going to wear.

After much consideration, I decided on a blue Florida Gators tshirt, with matching blue Florida Gators shorts (tucked in, mind you), you know, the ones with the Gator sewn on the left leg trim? My parents bought it for me when we visited Florida in the summer. I thought I was the man. My new Florida Gators gear, starting a new school, and [get this] an older girl sat next to me on the bus. I think she was in 7th grade. I was riding pretty high, and actually made small talk. It went a little something like this:

Me: Yeah, I'm excited for the first day.

Her: ::Looks at my shorts:: What's up with your shorts?

Me: What do you mean? We got them on vacation, they are the Florida Gators.

Her: No. I can see. OMG, Is that your underwear?

Me: What? Huh?

This next line will haunt me for the rest of my life...

Her: OMG, you are wearing boxer shorts as shorts!

I was in 6th grade. I didn't know what boxer shorts were. I always wore tighty whiteys. The dead giveaway that I was wearing underwear to school was the pee hole you get in boxers. I never even took notice, or let alone knew about boxers. At that age, all I ever wore were Umbro shorts, and these boxer shorts looked pretty similar to me.

I spent the rest of the day trying to not have my gleaming white undies show out of the boxer shorts I was wearing thinking they were normal shorts.

TL;DR: I shoulda gone for the Umbros.

2.) From nkcetera:

It was the first day of school and I was just starting first grade. I was in a brand new school and I didn't know anybody so I was really scared.

About halfway through the day, I had to go to the bathroom. For some reason, even though my teacher was a really nice lady, I was afraid she was going to say I couldn't go to the bathroom. So I sat there and held my pee for as long as my little 6 year old bladder would allow me to, which was about 3 minutes probably. Eventually I could not hold it in anymore and i pissed my pants. It got on the floor and went under my desk. Somehow, no one noticed that there was dripping water coming from underneath my chair, so I sat there with my wet pants for a good twently minutes. Eventually the girl behind me raises her hand and I hear her say:

"Mrs. Teacher I have water under my desk."

At this point I think I'm screwed and the teacher is going to call me out for pissing my pants and everyone is going to know and I'm never going to have any friends. But luckily the teacher said she would take care of it later and then after the school day was over she called me up to her desk and says:

"nkcetera, did you go to the bathroom in your pants?"

And at that point I just started crying because I was so embarrassed. The teacher was really nice about it though and she told me that it's okay and that it happens to everyone sometimes. We made an agreement from that point on that every time I got up and went to the bathroom to do my business, she would give me a Skittle. So it all worked out in the end.

TL;DR: Pissed my pants during school when I was 6, doesn't matter got Skittles.

3.) From Aoladari

Oh boy.... Kindergarden probably the first week or so.

I ask to use the bathroom, the girls room has someone in it, so my teacher says to use the boys room (it was single occupancy). So I walk in and I see this new contraption there. I think to myself, well thats a different kind of toilet, but it looks like fun. I drop my pants and hop up onto this bad boy and comence taking a dump.

I forgot to lock the door (hey it was the boys room, I was too distracted by being allowed into the boys bathroom!) and one of the other boys walks in and starts shouting to the class about how I pooped in the urinal.

4.) From bearshitinthewoods:

In 6th grade I went to the Bahamas with my parents for a winter Vacation. On the beaches down there, women walk around and try to sell things, particularly hair braiding. I decided that getting my hair braided would be kind of cool so I did. When we got back to the states, I decided to keep my braided hair (complete with green and white beads) for my first day back at school. I am a white male. It was one of the worst decisions of my adolescent life.

5.) From themanrighthere:

May have wrote this before, I forget.

Was in the 2nd grade, maybe third, it's all kind of vague. I'm from the middle of nowhere Texas and we had barely enough kids for two classes of 14ish kids. So the 2nd grade teachers rooms are connected by bathrooms between them. Teacher A ==bathroom== Teacher B The bathrooms consists of two toliets, no urinals. There are two connections between the room, one boy and one girls. I don't know if this was common for small shitty schoolhouses back in the day? But its how our podunk school was built.

Soooo, I went to drop a deuce. These didn't have locks, I guess because we were little kids, I don't know. Anyway, unbeknownst to me we are about to watch a movie Teacher B's room. That's awesome, except she forgot I was in there.. and had the kids line up single file to walk to the other classroom.

So pretty much what happened was.. I'M POOPING AND ALL THE KIDS ARE WALKING THROUGH SINGLE FILE POINTING AT ME AND LAUGHING.. saying HAA HAAA HES POOOOOPING!

=`(

Shit was traumatic.

6.) From highfructoscornsyrup:

Chewing on red pen, it exploded. Desperate to get rid of disgusting taste, I ran up to teacher. She thought it was blood, started freaking the f*ck out. Called nurse up, ignoring my attempts to explain it was just ink. Couldn't talk coherently because my mouth was filled with bitter red liquid. Red ink/saliva dribbling out my mouth, desperate not to swallow it. Tried to run out of classroom to water fountain, teacher practically tackled me to stop me. Thought I'd gone batshit crazy, bit my tongue off and was a danger to self/others. No one seemed to understand that it was just f*cking ink. Eventually had mental evaluation, even after it was clear that there were no injuries and I could explain, no, really, my pen exploded.

7.) From flatlineskillz:

TIL A lot of people pee their pants in 6th grade.

I did it at a field day. I was wearing gym shorts and been drinking water all day. I went to the bathroom and a friend comes storming in. I had a knee jerk reaction to pull my shorts up mid stream and keep pissing all over my shorts.

8.) From [deleted]:

This story actually takes place the day after a dance, but at a 6th grade dance I ended up dancing with the hottest girl in school. She wanted to dance close, but being a shy kid, I decided I would keep my distance. The next day on instant messenger she asked me why I wouldn't dance closer to her... To this day I do not know why I said this, but my response was, "because I had a really big boner." I never talked to her again.

9.) From [deleted]:

3rd grade at PE we were doing new exercises and it came time for the sit ups.. Coach Smith paired me up with this Latino girl I had a mad crush on and we were to show the class how to do a situp. She was to hold my legs while I did the situps and count. Afterward I was to hold her legs down while she did the sit ups.. It was going to be awesome..

My time came to do the sit ups.. At the 5th sit up, I cut the hugest tootiest fart I had ever done.. The whole class laughed at me, and then tried to imitate what I had done.. She jumped back and ran away screaming

I cried..

Coach ended PE class early that day..

Lesson learned never fart in public..

10.) From chopper640:

I wasn't feeling too well in math class during my freshman year of high school. I asked the teacher if I could go to the restroom because it felt like I was going to hurl. I get halfway to the restroom and I end up throwing up all over the hallway floor, in front of a class full of students. The next year in sophomore English we ha to write about a memorable experience and one of the kids in my class wrote about seeing it happen from the classroom I threw up in front of.

11.) From GraceDangerous:

For a few years growing up I lived in a really small town, and the elementary school, middle school, and high school were all in the same building. When the High School kids had their homecoming "Spirit Week" the entire school participated. Every day of the week student would dress up in some themed outfit (nerd day, twin day, etc). The first day was "pajama day."

I was six years old, in the first grade, and painfully uncool. Like, even for a first grader. Admittedly, I did it to myself: I was the teacher's aid, and a total goody-two-shoes. Also, my giant bug-eye glasses (tinted blue, which I thought was awesome) only added to the list of things for which I was constantly teased. But pajama day was going to change all that. See, I had this super sweet purple onesie (complete with footies) that I though would really push me over the edge, popularity-wise. People would see me in it and think, "man, that chick is so cool. Purple onesies are obviously the height of fashion."

This may be the time to mention that I was a chronic bed-wetter as a child. And the thing about being a bed-wetter is, you're embarassed and don't want anyone to know about it (even your parents) so you learn to do your own laundry really early; you hide the soiled sheets/clothes until you can inconspicuously wash them yourself. But sometimes this leads to confusion...

Woke up that day full of anxious excitement. Suited up in my PJs, got on the bus and rode to school. Exiting the bus, two girls in front of me make a comment about the stench of cat pee, and that's when the panic starts to set in. Had I grabbed from the wrong pile of clothes? Forgotten to wash? Hurriedly I dashed to the bathroom, locked myself in a stall, removed the offending garment and had a sniff.

F*CK. What have I done? How did I not notice the overwhelming scent sooner? Should I try and wash in the sink? That won't work - no air dryers. Call my mom for a change of clothes? No way - don't want her to be disappointed in me. Apparently going the whole day in pee-clothes was preferable to parental judgement. So I left the bathroom, resolved to suck it up and tough it out. And then I look around at the other students.

No one is wearing pajamas. It is clearly not pajama day, or any other day of Spirit Week, as I got the dates wrong, the entire week. And there I am, in my urine-soaked purple onesie on a regular ol' Monday.

tl;dr: I wore a urine-soaked purple onesie to school for an entire day.

12.) From fap_like_a_sir:

I had a huge bowlcut in middleschool. Like the kid from the shining, but not as long. I got my haircut the day before the first day of school and it looked pretty good. However, the next morning I woke up late and didn't have time to shower. My cowlick was out of control and was standing straight up. Instead of going to school with a hair boner I grabbed some hair gel and put quite a bit on to keep it weighted down. It felt crusty but I figure nobody else would notice.

The hair gel was very cheap. The kind that starts to break up as it dried out.

While on the bus to school, a kid behind me noticed all the white flakes in my hair, and screamed about how much "dandruff" I had. I was terrified as all the kids gathered around to see. I tried my best to explain but those kids were brutal.

I had been identified already as the kid with bad hygiene.

Later in the day an 8th grader loudly exclaimed that I had jizz in my hair. I had no idea what jizz was and tried my best to explain. Thank goodness nobody else was really around. Id rather be the kid with bad hygiene than the kid with jizz in his hair any day.

A few years ago I found out my nickname was penis head due to my bowlcut. I used to think my haircut was awesome.

Man, middle school was terrible.

13.) From [deleted]:

When I was 8 years old, I wrote the girl I liked a letter telling her that I liked her because I was shy. Turns out she wasn't! Then she shouted out to everyone that I liked her, laughed at me and tore up the letter.

F*ck you Joanne.

14.) From JayPetey:

In elementary school we were all assigned a country to do a little speech about. I was assigned Thailand.

One of the most beautiful places in the country of course is Phuket Island, and with a handful of pictures from the island I cut out from a book I spent at least 90% of this presentation talking about Phuket.

Yet, I was traumatized when a minute into my speech my classmates started laughing. And they laughed. And they laughed. And my teacher was red in the face with embarrassment, and so I just kept trucking through.

It wasn't until just about the end, that I realized that I had been pronouncing Phuket as "F*ck it" the entire time as I was reading my cards.

"This is the island of... F*ck it."

"F*ck it has many beautiful beaches..."

"I would love to go to F*ck it."

I booked it from that room in trauma.

tl;dr f*ck it.

(I learned later that the correct pronunciation is "Poo-ket")

15.) From americanInsurgent:

In seventh grade my class had become pretty close to our History teacher, so much so that most of the class time was spent joking about current subjects and making fun of Lewis and Clark's dog named Seaman (ya, we were that cool). Well one day, my friend dared me to hide under our teachers desk while she was gone and scare her when she came back. Thinking it was hilarious, I agreed. So after scaring her and having a good laugh, class ended and all was good for about a week or so.

Then came the call to the principal's office... The principal sat me down, asked me about the incident, lectured me on the rules of sexual harassment and let me know that I would be facing horrible consequences once the school board hears about what I had done. Basically telling my to at least suspect suspension, but also that expulsion was easily on the line.

Walking back to class I was devastated, I had never done anything bad before and my parents were going to freak. Once I walked into the class, I looked at my teacher and said "Mrs. Teacher, it was just a joke, I was only kidding" to which she replied "So was I", then winked at the principal and the whole class started laughing.

Needless to say, I learned my lesson and that teacher earned a cool place in my book after that. Crisis averted!

16.) From [deleted]:

Not my most horrifying moment:... When I was aged about 10 in primary school, a new kid started in the middle of the year. Every morning we had assemblies... I'm not sure if they have them elsewhere in the world (I live in the UK), but basically they take everyone in the school and put them in a big hall for half an hour, which means we're all standing packed pretty close together.

The new kid must have been nervous, because about 15 minutes into the assembly, he started to projectile vomit over everyone around him. He vomited over the people infront of him, then tried to run out and vomited over a bunch of people on his way out. He must have hit about 15 or 20 people. The school descended into chaos. Everyone was trampling each other trying to get out of the room. People were running around screaming, covered in vomit.

17.) From Vic_Valiant:

As senior class president, I had to get up and give a welcome speech to the new freshmen class on the first day of school. Unfortunately, I was also sick and losing my voice at the time. I get as far as "Hello, my name is Vic_Val..." when my voice LOUDLY cracks in the most pubescent sounding way. The freshmen all looked shocked and were too scared to laugh. I died inside, regrouped, and said "... Vic_Valient, and high school is full of moments like those. Get used to it." Then I continued with the speech. Decent save, but I still hear about it from friends.

18.) From which_tab:

When I was in middle school, I think maybe the 7th or 6th grade, I was in orchestra class. I played the violin but wasn't feeling that great that day. Eventually in class I realized that it was time to go the bathroom and eject my stomach into the toilet. I hurriedly told my teacher I didn't feel good and ran to the bathroom to vomit. I get to the bathroom, and as SOON as I vomit, the force on my stomach made me shit myself. I must have repressed what happened next because I don't remember anything after that. No one made fun of me for it, but having shat yourself in middle school with all your books in your classroom still, no easy way out....I must have Gohan blacked out, tapped into some unkown powers and teleported around that f*cking school

There are some truly ridiculous tattoos out there in the world, and there is a story behind every single one of them, even if it's a very dumb story.

It's one thing to walk around with a tattooed song lyric you no longer connect with, a Bible verse that no longer feels prescient, or a super common flower, and it's another thing entirely to think up a tattoo idea so heinously bad it still haunts the artist.

In a popular Reddit thread, tattoo artists and tattoo regulars shared the worst tattoos they've seen, and it's truly wild.

1. From rhombus_f*cker:

It wasn’t me, but when I was still an apprentice, a girl came in to get tattooed by my boss. She had a four-leaf clover tattooed on her clit, and she wanted my boss to go over it, and was saying that it was pretty faded. She seemed normal at the front desk and we exchanged small talk, and then I went back with her and was setting up my boss’ station. To make casual conversation I asked the client if it hurt a lot to get tattooed down there. This question changed something in her, and she turned to me with this crazy expression and said “honestly, I like the pain.” I nervous laughed and luckily was done setting up and f*cked off. My boss goes into his office with her and closes the door.

Then, not even five minutes go by and I hear the door open and she fast walks out and leaves the shop. I was like wtf just happened as my boss walks out, and he explains to me that the tattoo didn’t look faded at all. It was perfectly legible and looked recent. But the whole time she was begging him to go over it “just a little bit” and got extremely pushy until she just flat out started trying to seduce him until he told her to leave. It happened all so fast but I know I’ll never forget that one.

2. From tornligament:

My first tattoo artist told me this - woman came in wanting Where’s Waldo peaking out of her vagina. He told her to go home, sleep on it, and come back the next day if she really wanted it. She was there when the shop opened.

3. From flashthefastguy:

I had a client ask to make his nipple into Pinocchio’s face, it was weird but he was happy and we had a good laugh.

4. From professorlowcash:

Several years ago I tattooed the words "Jeffrey Dahmer" in sh*tty scratchy writing on a girl's neck for her 18th birthday. She had been coming into the shop a lot with her friends as they got tattooed and talking about it. She had the letters drawn up exactly as she wanted them and everything. The answer was always the same. "No f*cking way". When she finally turned 18 she came in with a few friends and asked again. I told her politely to f*ck off with her shenanigans. A few minutes later her friend told her he could just tattoo it with the "gun" he got off eBay at home. I made the hard choice to do the tattoo to ensure that it wouldn't get infected or be all scarred up if she ever decided to have it removed.

It's been circulating around the internet for several years. I still feel sh*tty about it, and hope she got it removed. http://cheezburger.com/6524093696

Also cheezburger throwback for extra classiness.

5. From Something_Obnoxious:

One that really stands out to me is that a guy came in wanting a pin-up of his wife tattooed on his thigh. Okay, not something I would get but it's common and understandable, the client tells the artist he wants her in the "Stay puff" costume from Ghostbusters. So, the artist took this as her in a sailors uniform. So he draws up a few different ones and shows the client who tells him "No No man, like -THIS-" and retrieves a drawing out of his pocket that is his wife made to look like the Michelin Man and the Stay Puff man were her biological parents.

She had a triple chin and everything. So the artist goes "Your body your choice man." And while he's getting tattooed his wife shows up and yeah she was for sure thicc but nothing like what the drawing depicted and every time she looked at the work in progress I could see the mixture of embarrassment and frustration across her face. Never saw them again but heard a few weeks later they got a divorce. Wonder what he did with that "Stay Puff" tattoo.

I'll still never know what in life possessed him to think that was a good idea.

6. From FlaxSeedBP:

My Tattoo Artist said a guy tried to win his possible father-in-law by tattooing the name of his business.

Of course he and the girl broke up later on.

7. From f1_77Bottasftw:

I know a guy who got "don't hire" tattooed across his knuckles.

8. From freshsandals:

I won a “worst tattoo” competition against a woman who had tattoo of Betty Boop bottomless and spread eagle with a puddle underneath her cooch.

This bad boy, a “rookie ring”, well known as the mark of a clueless cyclist. I didn’t feel deserving of my Worst Tattoo title... at least not compared to WAP Betty Boop.

9. From lillipeetle:

I was in a tattoo shop with a friend, there for moral support while they got their first. Well, we're waiting in the lounge area for my friend's appointment, and this guy walks out from the back area, shirtless. Across his chest in digital-lock font is "best lover" one word on each pec. My friend and my jaws dropped. The guy just paid the person at the front desk and left. The tattoo artist (I assumed) who followed him out sighed loudly and just kind of laid his head down on the counter before calling for his next appointment (not us).

I think maybe the artist wasn't proud of this one.

10. From liltittybigcityb*tch:

Apparently a guy came in a year ago and wanted pickle Rick on his dick. Not small, like the whole thing green with the face. She (the artist) didn’t do it but he got it done at someone’s home and came in like 6 months ago to ask her if she wanted to see.

11. From benofthejungle:

I saw a guy with the word "BEER" written in massive firey block letters across his lower back, tramp stamp style, at the beach.

12. From PolydeucesAreWild:

One of the other artists, for some reason had been wanting to tattoo a bloody tampon on someone. Well, this lounge lizard was like "you can do it on me". Ths artist drew it on to where it took up the entirety of his inner upper arm. He did it. The guy let him. Dafuq.

13. From xenophon57:

My friend had a girl's name one lined and initialed. Its what you do if you f*ck up in a naval log.

14. From pamelolsmil:

I didn’t do this but my colleague from studio did - mechanic heart stabbed with massive, shiny, metal penis. That was cool :D I was asked to do a swastika - I don’t do sh*t like this.

15. From v7h1h2:

A client came in very confidently asking for his dick to be tattooed to look like a horse.

See he already had a tattoo of a warrior woman in battle pose right above and around the base of his dick to look like she was riding it. He just wanted to take it up a notch.

The story gets better when he proceeds to pull his pants down in the lobby to show me. I was the front counter person, not an artist, so I had to find one of my co-workers to talk the guy out of it or something. I knew this was just a bad idea and didn't even seem possible to me.

Funny enough though one of the artists actually wanted to take the project on. She was into freaky sh*t like that (has definitely tattooed at least one a*shole).

She even tattooed my head before I got fired ;) too bad I never got to hear what happened to the guy though.

16. From CompetitiveArachnid6:

Once in a tattoo shop I made some pretty friendly conversation with a lady next to me about our tats and what they mean, so I thought I’d try to strike up the same topic with the next person when she left. A lady and her daughter sat next to me and I asked what she was getting done and the daughter like looked away as if she wasn’t paying attention and the lady turned and looked at me...tears in her eyes, paused and said “I’m getting a memorial for my friend who was murdered on Saturday....what about you?”. . . Nothing just some French bullsh*t I’m getting totally on impulse. Sorry I asked.

17. From nifflernifflin:

Not an artist.

Once knew a guy with a rape joke tattoo, depicted by Mickey Mouse - like rats with "Surprise Sex" written over them.

18. From ScarletInTheLounge:

One of the bouncers at the bar I went to for my bachelorette party had Charlie Brown's face tattooed on the back of his bald head. I definitely took a picture with him (well, the back of him) while covered in all my penis-themed party accessories.

19. From BigCaT31:

Guy in tech school had me draw a tattoo for him of a turtle being shot out of a cannon with a bo staff in one hand and some nunchucks in the other. The turtle was a mix of a koopa and ninja turtle wearing Chuck Taylors. The placement had it being shot up towards his nipple where it looks like it's about to bite it.

I accepted free WiFi as payment. He was known for getting weird tattoos such as his laundry mark on his lower back and his MTI's name and current rank on his calf. Nice guy, but good God he had weird taste in tattoos.

20. From FenrirApalis:

GF is a tattoo artist and I helped her Photoshop what the client wanted

Dude wanted to tattoo his ex-girlfriend. Already a questionable choice right? He wanted his ex-girlfriend's face combined with a cat. And he didn't even give us a specific cat, dude literally said find a cat off the internet so we did. Photoshopped his ex-girlfriend's eyes onto the cat and I questioned my existence as I pressed save.

Good thing we persuaded him out of it, but holy f*ck imagine if he met another girl in the future and she asked "wtf is this cat person on your chest"

As the wise poet Hannah Montana once sang, "everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days." Making errors is a basic fact of human life, and some errors are funnier than others (well, funny to the people who don't have to clean up after them).

1. Glamorous.

2. Delicious.

3. At least there's no more ice?

4. A nice chair for Barbie.

5. So that's where that comes from!

6. Well done.

7. Time for an upgrade.

8. He was fired.

9. That's a lot of Wite-Out.

10. Hope those seats have butt warmers.

11. Artsy.

12. Yum!

13. A beautiful color palette.

14. PIVOT!

15. Good color choice, though.

16: It was not fine.

17. Magnetic.

18. The ring is almost as nice as the bracelet.

19. When cats fly...

2020 is a year that will forever go down in history. I don't know about you, but I'm getting kind of tired of living through major historical events. With all of the craziness going on in the world, I think we could all use some laughs. These hilarious memes perfectly nail how we all feel about 2020.

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Petty revenge is a beautiful thing, it's like a gorgeous flower that blooms out of the seeds of disdain that have been quietly building up.

Sometimes, petty revenge is quick and clean and to the point, while other schemes are more involved, like an intricate web of anger wrapping itself around the recipient's throat.

While yes, it might technically be more emotionally healthy to "let things go" instead of getting revenge, taking the high road doesn't make for a good story, and tales of petty revenge can fill many a happy hour conversation.

In a popular Reddit thread, people shared their best personal stories of petty revenge, and you may want to take notes.

1. From iwmcguy:

This happened a while back, study hall in 8th grade actually. I always brought two small sandwiches to school so I could have one at lunch and one in study hall since our teacher let us eat in that class. One day as I was about to eat my Sandwich, I get up to use the bathroom. As I walk back in the classroom, I see the kid in front of me eating my sandwich. I was pretty annoyed but nothing serious at this point, so I confront him politely and he denies it completely. I left my sandwich on my desk the next day just to make sure it was him, and what do you know, it is.

So on the third day, I hatched a plan. I put habanero cheese on my sandwich, and then doused it all in ghost pepper sauce. That shit was everywhere, but it luckily didn't smell spicy. I get to study hall and my plan works flawlessly. I leave my trap sandwich on my desk and get up to use the restroom. This time I take as long as I can, and end up wandering the halls of the school. I did this because my study hall teacher was anal about the hall pass, and only one guy was allowed to leave the class at a time, even for water. After about ten minutes I come back into the class to be greeted by the sandwich thief crying hysterically with a bright red face waiting for the hall pass. He was in the bathroom for the rest of the day.

2. From redman2532:

My ex cheated with a married man. He now lives with her. He is a POS.. but anyway, I still have login for her DVR. I logged in, erased all her shows, then recorded only the show "Cheaters." Petty, but it makes me laugh.

Additional info: I also set the show to be manually erased and stop recording 3 hours after the show's end time.

3. From JoeySalamander:

A guy at work pissed me off. I placed this Craigslist ad with his phone number. Two free goats. Hablas espanol.

He spent the rest of the day getting calls every 15 minutes or so.

4. From a-dizzle-dizzle:

My mom had a fantastic one. She was a language teacher at my high school and years after I had graduated, she called me kind of upset because a group of guys was trying to make her look dumb. The class was supposed to write one of those team dialogues in Spanish, and had a week or so to prepare it, then had to perform it in front of the class. When she called for them to do theirs, they said, "But we already did ours, we're not doing it again." She said, "You definitely didn't do it, I don't have any record of it here and I would remember it if you had."

They refused to do it, insisting they already performed it and that it was her fault she didn't take notes/scores down. She was feeling puzzled and questioning herself, when one of the good kids came and said, "They didn't do it - they were bragging about making you look stupid and threatened the whole class if they told you anything. But please don't tell them I told you this, I don't want any problems with them." (These were those stereotypical dumb jock types who everyone was scared of for whatever reason).

My mom was really into yoga at the time and got a great idea while meditating. She went in the next day and said, "Boys, I owe you an apology. I found my notes on your presentation and I do remember it, I don't know how I forgot!" She went on to describe all the grammatical mistakes they made, that their dialogue hadn't been as long as required, that they didn't include the necessary vocabulary, etc. All made up. She failed them all on the project and they couldn't do a thing about it without admitting they'd made it all up.

TL;DR - My mom is awesome.

5. From spartan-44:

Kid stole my water bottle. I opened it up and left it inside his backpack.

6. From hardybe:

When I was a kid I had a bedwetting problem. I am not ashamed of this now, as thousands of other kids have had the same problems...at the time, however, this was humiliating. My younger brother started telling other kids around school how extensive the issue was. I was mortified.

Even after our mother told him to knock it off, he continued. So I decided to level the playing field. The whole "hand in cup of warm water" deal didn't work. I stood over him as he slept one night and pissed on him. The next morning, my mom was horrified and wound up taking a call from my grandmother.

"I don't know what to do, now BOTH of them are pissing the bed," she explained, clearly frustrated.

After a few more times of "framing" my brother as a bedwetter he completely stopped using my embarrassing problem as entertainment.

7. From sjmiller85:

I had a Chief Warrant Officer in Iraq throw a bottle of petroleum jelly at me after I got done ranting about something I've long since forgotten. Told me to go "take care of it, and come back when I feel better." During his afternoon siesta I spent an hour covering everything on his desk with it in the most inconspicuous spots (e.g. inside the handle of a coffee mug, underneath the handle of the Keurig pod loader, behind the canister holding Keurig coffee pods, anywhere he could grab something and not see it without first inspecting it).

He came back and proceeded to curse at a rate never witnessed before as he had to continuously wipe all the jelly off his hands every 3 minutes. He caught the jelly on the inside rims of his over-the-ear headphones before he rimmed his ears with it, but the best came after I let him calm down and get back to work.

Everyone else in the office watched me do it, no one said a thing, but they all had their eyes on me as I waited five minutes before picking up my phone on my desk and slowly dialed the number at his desk. It rings, everyone turns to look at him, he's on the computer, picks up the phone, slaps it to his ear, "Radio Battalion SIMOSONOFAB*TCH!!!" Turns his head, ear was caked full of petroleum jelly I had dumped all over the ear piece of the phone.

Master guns and Major told me these antics and pranks made that deployment. CWO Ryan, if you're reading this: Sorry, not sorry.

8. From reloadingnow:

Speeding up a coworker's double click speed and watch him squirm when his normal double clicking speed isn't working.

9. From pipenho:

In seventh grade I used to take home-made lunch to school. We prepared our own salad dressing (lemon juice, salt, oil, etc), and one kid decided it would be good to steal it, and drink it before lunch time. I asked him not to, but he continued to drink it, but started doing so in one gulp so I couldn't stop him. So instead of making a huge deal, I prepared two salad dressings. One that I would actually use on my salad, and another that had all the liquid condiments I could find in my mom's kitchen. It was really fun to see his face as he drank it.

He never stole my salad dressing again.

10. From whoshereforthemoney:

My favorite childhood story.

So I was an AP kid, and had a bunch of AP friends, and also was in sports and theater. I had a large bunch of friends in nearly every cliche.

Anyway. One day, one of my friends gets sucker punched in the halls by some dickwad. Because of the school's zero tolerance policy, getting sucker punched carries the same punishment as sucker punching. So my friend and the dickwad both got in school suspension, but only one of them was punched on the face.

I thought that was a little bit unfair.

So I got my friends together, and they got their friends together, and every week, one of us would sucker punch dickwad. Every week, one of us would have ISS, and so would dickwad, but since we are many, none of us went to ISS twice.

Dickwad on the other hand missed so much class, that he had to retake the grade.

11. From Azh_adi:

I was casually walking my pup in the same area I usually do. It's a nice trail surrounding a wetlands reserve and there's generally a lot of dog walkers and people riding bikes. The schools around here just let out for the day and there was a group of three boys riding bikes coming from behind me. I could hear their muffled talking and giggling and all of a sudden they were a few feet behind me and one of them yelled, "Hey! Catch!" and threw some crumpled paper at me.

I couldn't care less about the paper but the yelling scared my lil pup so I was naturally angry but being awkward I didn't say anything. What am I going to do? Beat up some kids? I did have my pups steamy tatertots in a bag and as they rode off I lightly tossed it. By god it lands in one of the kids hoodies...AND HE DIDN'T NOTICE. They were too busy cackling away at how they, "Got eeemmmm." I saw them riding ahead and it took maybe a hundred yards before he noticed there were some little round brown dumplings in his hood. He screamed and threw the bag onto the ground while the other two died laughing. They looked back at me but I was so far behind them that they just rode onward.

I also couldn't help myself and laughed as I picked up the poo and threw it out a few minutes later. You know...got to be a good citizen and all that.

12. From DoctorRaulDuke:

A guy swerved across two lanes on the highway one day and cut me up. I slammed on the anchors and gave a good indignant blow of my horn. He starts acting like Mr. Angry at being called out so starts slamming on his brakes, then speeding up if I try to overtake, flipping me the bird, the whole caboodle.

Seeing the next junction coming up I flash my lights and start beckoning to him in classic 'you want a piece of me?' mime, and mouthing 'come on then'. Then start pointing at the upcoming junction. He obviously believes I actually want to go somewhere quiet and sort it out like a*sholes men. I swerve angrily into the exit lane and he follows suit. Finally, I blow my horn and point at something on the junction then, whilst he's distracted, swerve back out onto the main highway and speed up so I'm level with him so he can't get back over. He looks over in panic, I smile and blow him a kiss.

The junction ends and he's stuck sailing off wherever the junction takes him. It's a 24-mile round trip to get back to here.

13. From yeahhtrue:

Back in college, I was sitting in the library trying to work on an assignment. All was quiet for awhile until this one obnoxious guy came in and sat at a table near me and proceeded to pull out his phone and have the loudest, most obnoxious conversation with one of his friends. Lots of "BRO, SERIOUSLY BRO?" and yadda yadda. I was about to pack up my things and find somewhere else to work when the conversation turned to Netflix.

The guy told his friend he should just use his account, and proceeded to loudly state his email address and password for all to hear. This was too good of an opportunity for me to pass up, so I promptly logged in and navigated to the "LGBT" section and started adding the gayest movies I could find to the top of the queue.

I like to think that both guys ended up thinking the other one added the movies to the queue but were too shocked to ever say anything to each other.

14. From Lil-Night:

This happened to my SO when he was at university - another comment here reminded me of it. His class were doing presentations in pairs, and he got paired with some girl who didn't bother to bring notes or research information for their presentation. She instead let him do all the work, and any slides she did were made from his notes and research. He complained to his tutor and she told him "Don't worry, leave it to me". And then the day of the presentation comes.

They present, and then at the end the tutor asks the girl a question. If I remember correctly the question was something like "Is there any evidence to suggest that some cultures are more prone to mental health problems?" And the girl answered no. The tutor then asked my SO the exact same question, and because he'd actually read the research on the topic, he was able to list several studies that showed that some cultures are in fact more prone to mental health issues.

The girl glared at him the entire time he answered the tutor's question. Pretty sure she ended up with a D, while he got an A or B.

15. From overbread:

I had a 6-month school internship at a mobile phone store. The boss was a total a*shole that treated his school-interns like full paid workers (even gave me some concerning money-responsibilities).

A while after the internship he called to tell me I would have to give a statement at court. He had a problem with some customer and a shipment and he planned to tell the court that he explained me everything concerning shippings precisely. Of course, he didn't. And of course, I didn't lie in front of the judge. My boss' attorney gave me a look I will never forget when he realized his stupid plans didn't work out. Few weeks later my now ex-boss tried to call me again. I didn't pick up. F*ck this guy.

16. From porcelain_queen:

On every email I send, I attach my name, company, position, etc. ALL the time people will respond "Thank you Sara"....but my name is spelled with the "H". I have started to reply to them leaving off a letter of their name. "No problem Rene" "Have a good day Jon". They probably think I am an idiot, but it is worth it to me.

17. From caca_milis_:

When I was a kid I got the Sabrina the Teenage Witch "Handbook" - it was full of kiddie experiments and stuff and was pretty fun.

My older sister had upset or annoyed me about something, so I tried out one of the 'tricks' from the book, you fill a cup with water and some corn kernels, put some tinfoil on top of the cup, the kernels eventually pop and it makes noise against the tinfoil.

I put it under her bed, it takes a few days to "work", so I completely forgot about it, until one night I woke up to my two sisters whispering - it had popped in the middle of the night and she thought there was a rat under her bed.

18. From AR3Leatherworks:

Someone in my office would always crush lunches with his gigantic a*s lunch box. Either he ate bricks or lead, I don't know, but I always came to the office fridge and found that my lunch was in pieces.

So, after three bouts of this, and numerous notes from myself and other colleagues, I carefully removed his lunch box, emptied the contents (a gigantic sandwich, a Twinkie, chips, some vegetable pieces, and a few other bits), and ran over them with my car. I carefully packed it back in, and put it back.

He kept his lunch in a cooler by his cube from then on.

19. From whereyouatdesmondo:

We were sitting by a pool once, and a woman stood over my wife and started spraying sunscreen all over herself - and my wife. We asked her nicely to please move and she ignored us and kept spraying. When we left, I took one of her flip flops with me.

20. From andybent25:

As a nurse, we had this god awful patient, who made all our lives hell. Needed pain meds on the dot, needed to smoke every half hour, sat on the call light all damn day. This person was possibly the rudest human being I've ever met. Treated us like slaves, and was drug seeking. It finally came time for discharge, and this patient decided to come up with a whole bunch of new medical problems. " I have chest pain! I have nausea! One side of my body feels numb!" So, being the very skilled and rational nurse I am, I asked the doctor for a whole new set of orders.

First, I asked for lab draws every 3 hrs (meaning needles every three hours) to check cardiac markers. Then I asked that the pt be placed on NPO status (nothing by mouth) for the nausea. This person couldn't go an hour without eating something. For the numbness, I requested the pt be placed on strict bed rest for 24 hrs, and then have a physical therapy eval ordered (which meant no more going downstairs to smoke). I explained this all to the patient, and he says " Sh*t! I just wanted to stay another night. I ain't doing any of that! I feel fine, just give me my damn papers!" Talked it over with the doctor on call, he gave me the all clear to discharge, and I had him out the door in an hour.

What's in a name? A rose by any other name would smell as sweet, but a rose that has licenses and accreditations under the name "rose" would prefer to keep it so they could practice their profession.

A divorcée who kept her married name for professional reasons asks if she's an a**hole for keeping the name even though her ex-husband remarried.

She writes:

So this just happened and I’m not sure how I feel.

My ex and I divorced 12 years ago. We have two children and share custody. We have a great coparenting relationship and have had zero issues with anything since our divorce. My ex met his now wife five years ago and we get along good as well. She is a good stepmom to my children and she treats them like they are her own. I have remained single by choice because I spend most of my time at work or with my children. I date occasionally but I am not looking for anything serious.

My ex and his wife were married two weeks ago and I am very happy for both of them. I think it’s great that they finally made it official and that they found happiness with each other.

Sounds like an incredibly healthy setup, but here's where the conflict comes in.

Tonight my ex's wife texted me the following.

Her: So I think now that me and (ex) are married you should change your name. After all there can be only one Mrs. (ex's last name). (Smiley emoji)

Me: Hi (wife’s name). I hope you are both doing well. I’m a little confused as to why I would need to change my name.

Her: Because we are married now and I’m his wife. I should be the only one with his last name.

Me: Ex and I have not been married for over 12 years. The reason I did not change my name is due to all my professional certifications and licenses. Ex and I agreed when we got divorced that it was too much of a hassle to change everything and I would keep my last name the same to avoid the stress and headache of having to do that.

Her: Well that changes now. You WILL change your name immediately.

Hopefully the ex-husband doesn't have any extended family or a common last name like Smith, because his new wife seems super territorial.

Things escalated when he got involved:

I didn’t respond to the last text she sent and after about 10 minutes my ex called me and demanded to know why I upset her. I sent him screenshots of the texts and my replies and told him that this entire conversation is ridiculous and immature. He told me that maybe I should just change my name so he doesn’t have to deal with the drama. I told him I refuse. I said that again we agreed during the divorce I wouldn’t change my name, and even if I wanted to, most of the state offices and courts are closed where we live and it would be near impossible to do.

I told my ex that we haven’t been married for 12 years, I have zero romantic feelings for him and that the only reason I have maintained a relationship with him is because of our children. I told him that they are our priority and we need to all get along to raise them as good coparents. I told him that changing my name won’t make me any less my kids mother or his ex wife and that unfortunately new wife needs to deal with it.

He told me I was making his life difficult and wishes I would reconsider.

AITA for not wanting to change my name?

What a shame for the newlyweds that this is how they're spending their honeymoon period.

Unfortunately for the blushing bride, the Reddit Jury sides with the divorce.

The top comment, from A2Z-THC, succincently states, "No tell her to f*ck off, smiley face."

"NTA (Not The A**hole), it's not on you to manage his relationship with her," ofmusesandkings wrote. "He's completely misplacing the responsibility for the conflict. SHE'S making his life difficult, you're just the target."

"I’m a small petty person; I’d do a quick search online for ex‘s last name and send the results to her and ask if she’s gonna contact each of them and ask them to change their names as well since there can only be one Mrs. Ex’s last name," go_go_again pitched.

There are reasons not to change her name other than spite. Our heroine did her due diligence and research what it would take to heed to the new wife's request. It would take both a lot of time and a lot of money:

I also looked into the time and cost to do the name change last night. I would have to have a formal court hearing with a judge and have a signed and sealed decree to change it at DMV and social security. The courts here are closed due to obvious reasons and are only hearing emergent matters. So my name change would be delayed. Not to mention the cost of this will be in the thousands and that includes the reprinting of all my degrees and certifications, new office letterheads, business cards, updating to the state list for my profession and my malpractice insurance. This will not be an easy process.

Damn, that's almost as annoying as the divorce.

Ladies, do you need a reason to laugh today? We've got 23 of them right here. These memes are silly, relatable, and laugh-out-loud funny. Give it a look if you're ready to get your giggle on.

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