Most terrible dates are terrible in subtle ways. The two may have absolutely nothing in common, or too much in common that it feels like they're siblings. They might have differing opinions on a problematic podcast or, even worse: might have a warrant out for their arrested.

People on Reddit commiserated about the worst dates they have ever been on, and the disasters range from accidentally harboring a fugitive to getting a proposed to on the first date.

1. The car accident isn't even the worst part.

I went on an online date with this guy when I first moved back home from college...

We met up and I have a habit of telling my parent "i'm going out, I'll be back later" w/o specifics, etc. Anyway, this time, she says "just be careful and if he can't drive, get out the car."

We were en route to our first destination and it was closed. So, he asked me where I wanted to go and I said, "Hooters and bowling." I know, keep it classy right here.

His driving was so reckless... I mean, REALLY bad. Anyway, we ended up going across town because he wanted to take me to this one place. By this time I've determined I'm not into him and I want out, so I just go along with it, maybe we can be friends, right?

His breaks give out and we end up having an accident. We ran into the back of a truck pretty hard and I jerk forward, glasses flying off. After the smoke settles, when I'm nervous, I start laughing. He asks if I'm okay, I said sure and I'm looking for my glasses and he goes, "oh this is bad, really bad." So, I said "Why? No insurance?" He says, "No, I have a warrant for my arrest." He gets out the car and runs. As he's running into the sunset, he's yelling back at me "i'm really sorry, I can't afford to go to jail again."

The person we hit, leaves. So, I'm the only one there and police show up. I had to call my parent to come pick me up because I have no friends in the area and of course, I gave the cops his info. I knew I wasn't going to talk to him again. The police gave me a ride to a gas station across the street as I was waiting for someone to pick me up. I leaned back, took a picture in the cop car, posted it on Facebook and tagged him in the picture. Somewhere in between the running he found time to get on Facebook and block me.

Bad part about not just the accident, I didn't even get a chance to enjoy Hooters and wings.-filmpster

2. Three strikes, and you're out:

I went out with a guy that my roommate set me up with a few years ago:

-First, he was vocally irritated that I wore heels because it made him less taller than me. Note, he was still taller than me by a few inches, but just less taller...

-After dinner, we met back up with my roommate and her boyfriend and we all went to a house party of their friends (I basically knew no one).

-At the party, my date's (somewhat newly) ex-girlfriend was there. To summarize, she called me a wh*re, spilled my drink on me, threatened to fight me, told me she gave him herpes, left, came back an hour later looking for me, hugged me, grabbed my a**, and apologized and told me I was hot.

So I guess it went pretty well by the end of the night. -amphgrl

3. An interesting name. Is that Croatian?

I went on a Tinder date with a guy who is now in my contacts as "Donotanswer Penispic."

Prior to the date he seemed normal. We texted and talked on the phone then arranged to meet at a restaurant/bar.

He was cute but definitely bitter about something. He was from California and apparently didn't like this new city we were in. He started talking about sex and blow jobs and complaining about how uptight everyone here is about sex.

He invited the waitress to a party his company was throwing, after sending back the French fries he ordered.

I showed him a picture of my dog on my phone; he took out his phone and showed me a picture of his penis.

We walked out of the restaurant together to get our cars from the valet. My car came first and I left. He texted me later that he had my sweater (apparently I dropped it on the way out) and if I wanted to see it again I'd have to hang out with him.

RIP, sweater. -notorepublic

4. Take notes.

Met a guy from OKCupid. He seems nice, but never stops talking. After interrupting me for the 3rd or 4th time, I finally ask him "do you want to hear anything I have to say?" He apologizes profusely, says "you're right, I'm so sorry!" and pulls out a pad of paper and a pen. He then jots notes as I'm telling him about myself and whatnot. I finally ask him what he's doing and he says "oh, I'm writing down things I want to tell you when it's my turn to talk again." -Breakfast27

5. I wonder what he was like before the head trauma.

Went on a date with a guy who seemed really cool. He used to race bikes until he landed on his head after attempting a jump.

During the date he:

-Told everyone we were on a date. Everyone.

-Told me he wanted to kill his ex roommates.

-Asked the waitress to make the date more romantic, so she brought out a giant ice cream sundae (meant for 2 people to share). He ate it all by himself, and spilled ice cream all over himself.

-Bragged about beating the world record for the jump on which he landed on his head.

-Kept asking me if I was a gold digger, because he makes tons of money and needs to protect himself.

-Demanded separate bills (no big deal).

-All 4 of his credit cards were declined. Asked me if I didn't mind paying and he would get it next time. (not that there would BE a next time ever)

-Told everyone that the date went "splendidly".

-Gave me stickers to his welding company as a thank you for paying since his credit cards must have some kind of error. -ismelllikecoconuts

6. A surprise happy ending.

Back in college I was invited to an ice rink with a girl I liked and some of her friends. I did not know how to ice skate and I did not pick it up very quickly but I wanted to try and impress her somehow. Well I hugged the wall the whole time and made a fool of myself. The highlight was when I saw a flash of light as I fell in front of a group of people. Turns out I had fallen right at the moment someone took a picture so my failure was immortalized forever. She took me back to my apartment and ended the relationship before it began.

On a lighter note, the woman who is now my wife was at that ice rink on that night. We didn't realize we were there the same time until a year or two into our relationship and she exclaimed "You were that guy who couldn't ice skate! Yeah, she didn't seem that into you." -Krell47

7. Auntie doesn't deserve that.

He was more than three hours late, and was texting me telling me that he was 20 minutes away for two of those hours. As soon as he arrived he tried to tell me to leave the part of the venue/dive bar I'd already paid in to so we could go where he wanted, tried to start a fight with a friend I'd happened to run into, and called my aunt (who'd talked me into going out with him in the first place) a "c*ckblocking bitch".

I just walked away from him after that last one, and we never spoke again. -​​​​​​IJustStoppedByToSay

8. Yummy.

Went on a blind date with a lady who wouldn't stop picking at her scabs. Just made a pile out of them on the restaurant table. I excused myself to use the washroom and when I came back my soup was there but the pile of scabs wasn't. No I didn't eat the soup. -​​​​​​sarin77

9. A tempting offer?

Guy told me he just recently got out of a long term relationship so he wasn't looking for a commitment but asked me if he could be my "maintenance man" as he stroked his penis through his jeans. -Lil_Bear

10. It was love at first sight (for her).

Over the course of the date, she made multiple references to how nice it was to see so many other couples out and about that day, and attempted to name our future children and discuss weddings. There was not a second date. -moogable

11. Misogyny like it's 1999.

I was a barista in a cafe during college and this loyal customer asked me out. Took me to sushi, took me to a bar and bought me a drink. Conversation good, nothing SPECTACULAR but he was cute and intelligent and funny.

When he takes me home he parks outside of my house and assumes he's coming in. I'm like.... no? Genuinely confused, he asks why not. He says he did everything right, he bought me dinner and a drink, so he should get to come inside, and we should have sex now. Because that's how it goes.

And then we start ARGUING about it and I start to worry that he's going to just like, enter my apartment whether I like it or not. I am having to literally explain that just because he bought me dinner does not mean I have to fuck him. Then he puts on a Prince CD to try and get me in the mood. He actually said "Here, just listen to this, Prince is sexy! All girls like Prince!"

I think I may have RUN when I finally got out of his car. -mrspeacockwasaman

12. Good grief.

I had a very disappointing date in high school. It was the dead of winter. Like - 40 Celsius. We had gone to a movie, and the whole thing was really awkward. She didn't really seem to want to be there, was very detached. After the movie, and the bus trip home, she admitted that the only reason she even agreed to the date with me is because my friend had turned her down a few days earlier (I wasn't aware of that at the time) That a pretty big let down and waste of time.

But I figured whatever, I'll head home, and find something else to spend time on, I'll get over it eventually. I got off the bus and just wanted to get home as soon as possible. At the bus stop there is a thigh high railing around the front of the nearby parking lot, instead of walking around it, I decided to step onto, and then over it.

The second I stepped onto it, I realized it was coated in ice. I "Charlie browned" the f*ck out. Just flipped through the air. Lost everything in my pockets. Ripped my pants from a**hole to zipper. And then came down hard right onto the railing with my shin, fracturing it.

It's still - 40 out. I can't just lay there till help comes. So I fish around in the snow, grab my stuff, try to stuff my balls back into my pants, and stagger home.

TLDR : Its not me it's you, limped home balls in the wind. -ProtoJazz

13. Where you think you're going, baby?

I was really young, probably about 15 or so. I was boy-crazy. I had a crush on every guy who even remotely expressed an interest in me, but this guy...there are no words to describe this guy.

His name was Jesse. We met through a mutual friend, and while he wasn't exactly my type, he told me he thought I was pretty and so, I wanted to give him a chance.

A couple weeks later we decide to meet up at the mall for our first official date. He was very sweet, we were holding hands, you know typical teenage bullsh*t. But then he got weird. VERY weird.

We're sitting on this bench and he turns to me and stares at me right in the eyes and says "Wow, when I look at you, and I look into your eyes I feel like I'm looking into your soul." Okaaaaay. I'm fifteen and desperate for an epic love story so I just smile. He goes on "DFTBAwesome, I know this seems soon but...I think you might be my soulmate. I can't wait until the day we can get married, and have babies and live together. We're going to have such an amazing life together."

So let me recap. I'm fifteen, I'm on a FIRST DATE, and my date just essentially proposed to me.

I noped the fuck out of there and never talked to him again.

TL;DR: HEY, I JUST MET YOU. AND THIS IS CRAZY. BUT YOU'RE MY SOULMATE, PLEASE HAVE MY BABIES. -DFTBAwesome

Alright, September 1st is not technically Halloween, but that won't stop some of us from going pumpkin crazy starting today. To be honest, it's been hard to hold out this long. Every person who loves Fall and doesn't give a rip that it's still hot as hell outside will appreciate these hilarious Halloween-loving memes. Grab a pumpkin spice latte and your sunscreen and let the madness begin.

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Working behind the camera gives you a unique view into the true personalities of people who appear on the screen - whether they're actors, regular people being interviewed in documentaries, reality stars, or television journalists.

The camera people and crew possess knowledge of both the technical details that keep a show running, but also all of the emotional mess that unfolds behind the scenes. While actors and stars on screen are often the ones fielding questions, we'd all be the more wiser if we asked the people creating television what exactly goes on.

In a popular Reddit thread, camera people and documentary filmmakers share their most messed up experiences behind the scenes.

There is a lot to unpack here.

1. From skeeterou:

Oh I've got a lot. I was a camera op for Shipping Wars on A&E, My 600 Lb. Life for TLC, North Woods Law for Animal Planet, and High Profits for CNN, and others.

Probably the worst was on My 600 Lb. Life. One family was moving out of their apartment, and we were shooting the move. They were very very unsanitary. Instead of cleaning up their dog sh*t in the small 2 bedroom apartment, they would put plants on top of it. We had to use a mentholatum oil on our upper lips to withstand the stench.

The grandma was sleeping on a bed in one of the bedrooms. When they went to remove the bed and flipped it over, thousands of bugs scattered out of the bed all over the room. The 80-something-year-old woman was sleeping on a bed that was infested with roaches and god knows what other bugs. It was the most disgusting thing I've ever seen.

I'm also directing and shooting my own documentary about Cluster headaches, aka Suicide headaches. Watching someone in that amount of pain will change your life. My doc: www.clusterdocumentary.com

2. From ZardozSpeaks:

I was freelancing between film jobs by shooting segments for Inside Edition. On the way to an interview the producer, who wrote his interview questions in the car on the way over, kept talking about how he had to make this woman cry. "They love it upstairs when you can make them cry," he said. "It's the gold ring."

So we go to this woman's house, get the gear inside, set up the interview and start rolling. It turns out this woman saw her husband and son killed in front of her when the motorcycle they were riding on was hit by a drunk driver. The segment was about drunk drivers who had killed people and gotten away scot free. This guy ran to Canada and he still lived there ten years later.

The producer asked a lot of tear-jerkingly emotional questions and finally got her to cry. It was heartbreaking. As we drove away he all but high-fived himself, he was so happy.

On Strange Universe the producer wanted my sound person to drive the van through a funeral procession so we could shoot it from up close, out the side door. We said no. Where do they get these people?

3. From Lis_9:

My husband was doing a documentary for college and we were filming next to a museum and a guy told us: "Are you cops? Stop filming us! this is a drug-dealing place". We thought he was joking. Turns out, it was truth.

They surrounded us and were very violent. Thankfully, my husband kept calm, explain that it was something for college and he'd delete the scene. I was pregnant and then one of them, realized that it was impossible for us to be cops, so he calm the others and told us "Leave!". We ran out of there. It was very scary.

We ended up very scared. I mean, they were like six guys and we were only two. I have to say we were in a very public place. We weren't in an alley or something like that. There were street vendors around, it was Sunday afternoon. We thought the guy was joking. It was crazy.

4. From slartibartfist:

I was cameraman for a series about strip clubs in the local area (Birmingham UK). We filmed for about 8 weeks, spending most of our time behind the scenes, talking with the girls, getting a bit of insight into why they were strippers (for the most part, they were earning money for college etc).

It was just about the least sexy thing I could imagine; not my cup of tea. Couldn't get my head around why men would want to spend money (and sooo much money, at that) when all you could do is look, no touching, no happy finishes. After the first hour of filming, I was immune from any idea that I'd find it sexy. Not like I was spending every day walking around with a semi.

Got to know the girls well. They were universally nice people, doing a job. And even the attractive ones - once you know a bit about them, and why they were getting their tits out - it was as far from being a turn on as I could imagine.

On the last day of filming, in the brightly-lit changing rooms at the back of Legs 11, our (female) producer asked if I had ever had a "private dance" - no, I hadn't, and no I didn't want one.

"Oh, we can't have that! Who's going to give slartibartfist a dance? He's never had one!"

They sat me in a chair, and with my sound man filming it, one of the girls did her "private routine" for me. Well, on me. Lots of gyrating, rubbing herself on my legs, then pulling her pants aside and getting an inch away from my nose...

Christ.

It was all in good humour, but it was f*ckin' weird. Uncomfortable. I mean, where do you look? And everyone was watching me. I knew this girl, I'd filmed interviews with her and her kids; she wasn't my type (sooo not my type), but she was a sweet person, and now she's putting on the sultry looks, sticking her nethers in my face. And I had an audience - a dozen other girls, mostly naked, my producer, my sound man, our production assistant, all standing round watching and laughing.

I didn't know where to look.

In hindsight, I think I did a good job of playing along; acting the right sort of jocular / cringy / ha ha ha, isn't this uncomfortable thing, but in reality it just all felt a bit f*cked up. And the room was so f*ckin' bright.

Not exactly nightmare stuff, but occasionally it does freak me out to remember that somewhere, sitting on a shelf in the TV station's archives, there's a DigiBeta tape of my "private dance". Eech.

My second-most weird experience was earlier in the series; we were filming a husband and wife who had set up a business doing live internet porn stuff from their home. After filming a sequence where the wife showed how they cleaned their toys/dildos etc each day in their dishwasher, in the kitchen (?!!), the producer and the wife went into the other room to chat about stuff, and the husband came over to me and said "Hey, slartibartfist, my wife thought it could be quite cool for you to join us one night - want to shag her?"

I actually thought about it for a split second. Hadn't got a girlfriend at the time, but my overriding thought was "I'm going to say no, but how do I turn down the offer politely? Oh, geez, is my face looking horrified? Sh*t, what expression is on my face right now?"

5. From goldenrobotdick:

First day shooting news I got to watch a bloated, dead body be removed from a river.

6. From 404timenotfound:

I'm not a documentary filmmaker per se, but I have made short documentaries in the past. One of the worst was when I was interviewing someone with schizophrenia. The whole point of the project was to show how we're not so different and to try to curb the stigma around mental illness. Anyway, this guy walked up right after we finished filming and asked what we were doing.

I told him, and in front of the woman with schizophrenia, he started saying all th*s shit about how all people with mental illnesses are dangerous, and how I should be careful because she might attack me. It was all kinds of messed up, so I told him to f*ck off and he was somehow offended at me. I knew from stories I had heard from a bunch of people how bad stigma can be, but I had never seen it quite like that. Crazy stuff.

7. From Waneman:

So back in late 80s I worked for a local television station in Paducha, Kentucky. We were hosting the (whatever-whatever) annual Children's Miracle Network, Live. I was running the remote or "bunny-cam" as we sometimes called it. I would go around the studio audience and get bumper shots or reaction shots or whatever the director yelled in my headset to get.

About mid-way through the evening during one of those exhausting montage vignettes showing kids in need of help I took a rest off to the side of the audience. Little did I know that my cam was giving the control room a impromptu up-skirt of a not-at-all unattractive woman. It could have easily been the elderly lady in the seat behind her if I was sitting on the next step up.

Noting went live thankfully (although they might have seen a spike in donations if it had.) They let it go on I guess until I asked what they were all giggling and talking about.

Once they told me my face went to thirteen shades of red as I slowly backed right on out of there before anyone had suspicions.

I passed the remote cam to someone else to take over and I jumped on one of the fixed studio cams never to look back. I never lived it down.

8. From CobraCornelius:

When this crazy hobo accused me of filming him. He thought I was a cop but I was just getting B-roll then he chased me into a bar.

9. From joshtay11:

I used to shoot and edit short docs for NGOs that did water well work overseas. Burkina Faso was the most remote location out of all the trips I had taken. We stayed in a small dirt village a few hours from the capital, then drove another 2 hours every morning to get to our locations.

Anyway, we met this witch doctor who brought us to his small mud house. We asked if we could film b-roll inside, but he was being super hostile and wanted something valuable in return. We argued back and forth for a bit through our translator but had no luck. Then the witch doctor told us he would approach the spirits and ask them if it was ok for us to come in.

He went inside his shrine and started shaking this bead shaker and talking to someone. We could hear both voices, completely different sounding, and at times talking over each other. This went on for a few minutes. Then he came out and asked us to drink this potion if we wanted to go in. Our guide suggested we don't, but we had come this far, so we each took little sips. He met with the spirits one more time, then finally let us in.

It was a dark mudroom, no bigger than the size of a queen bed, with a single beam of light coming through. He showed us his dolls and medicine. Also, razor blades that he would use to make cuts on children's bellies and stuff medicine into (saw some gnarly scars that trip too). But the whole time I was looking for a voice box or recorder to explain the phoniness of the "spirits" but found nothing. Kind of gave me the creeps.

10. From Codf:

I was hired through a friend to shoot a basic music video, that had been scripted by the band. They literally need just camera operators.

So we turn up at this old townhouse, still not knowing anything about what's about to happen and are greeted by a lady, dressed in a silk bathrobe with her face painted bright yellow. Ok...cool, as we walk in this man pops his head out and his face is bright green he's in his underpants. Ok...this could still be a video I guess.

Anyway, we're setting up still totally confused and in walks Jesus, complete with a crown of thorns and a nappy. We're now very much suspicious, this is weird porn.

Turns out it was just an eclectic music video, the official release got 30k views on YT and later that year they played with a regional Philharmonic.

It was still going to be porn until we left though.

11. From RollX:

I worked on a documentary about Riker's Island, which is a very large jail just off the north part of Queens, NYC. The whole thing was surreal, but the worst part was the maternity ward where incarcerated mothers had a few hours a day to see their kids in a large acrylic cell.

We had incredible access to everything- one of the executive producers was the niece of Rose Singer, whom the nursery is named after and she became a member of the Board of Corrections of NYC shortly after.

Other things that stand out:

Unannounced 'TEAMS' meetings at 0600 where the main governing body of the island grilled the heads of each jail about incidents and things like amount of toilet paper their jail used that month.

The smell of hardcore disinfectant and overwhelming body odor.

The food was a lot of starchy pasta and soda.

Extraction was the term used when officers went in as a team and removed an inmate by surprise force to find contraband.

The officers patrolled the island on mountain bikes. They had water teams of boats, jet-skis, and divers. LaGuardia is only about a hundred feet away at one point so there are escape attempts, but the divers are there to rescue prisoners. There's a dangerous tidal pool call Hell Gate there.

You enter by bridge, the producers made sandwiches in a cooler for everyone.

Found some info about the nursery:

http://www.correctionalhealthcareblog.com/2012/10/female-inmates-in-nyc-benefit-from-the-rose-m-singer-nursery-program/

12. From Erunamo99:

I was part of a camera crew filming a documentary in a business. Female employee had pranked a male employee's car. He became violent when he confronted her, so we had to restrain him. I got to hit him with the boom (mic), which was rather satisfying as nobody really like him.

13. From throwyoworkaway:

I work in the television industry, and had to digitize an old cassette from a police confession or something like that.

It was for a show that was all about survivors of killers, and the guy was admitting what he did, who he killed, where they are, all details.

It wouldn't be so bad, but we didn't really have the equipment to do it. So I had to listen to the full two hours of the confession because it kept cutting out while recording, and would have to be restarted.

It was f*cked up how casual he was explaining how he killed people and sh*t, by the end of the interview he was begging for the death sentence. It was really f*cked up to hear.

14. From 4u5t3n:

I'm a former one-man-band reporter. I shot, wrote and edited my stories. No fancy van or crew.

I can't count how many non-live stand-ups or interviews on the street were ruined by the "F#$% her in the Pussy" non-sense.

Some examples, not all mine.

Apartment building fire with multiple families on the street crying? Someone drives by and yells "F her in the P"

Interviewing the neighbor of a woman who police believe is being held at gunpoint by her drunk husband. Another driver swings by "F her in the P"

Another reporter I worked with: Candlelight vigil, and someone runs into his camera shot and yells "F her in the P."

It stopped being funny years ago, now you are just being rude.

15. From CitizenTed:

Not a news cameraman, but my buddy was.

One evening in Southern California, a retiree refused to accept his family's plan to put him in a home. He barricaded himself in his house (just blocks from my house) and threatened the police with gunfire.

The police responded by firing tear gas canisters through the windows. I watched the whole scene. My buddy arrived with his news crew and started filming. After the old man was dragged away in cuffs, my buddy wanted to get a post-mortem close-up shot of a broken window. We got up close to the window just as the police turned on a huge fan to disperse all the tear gas inside the house. The tear gas shot through that 4-inch hole in a huge shaft of gas, directly into our faces.

My buddy got it good, and so did I. We fell on the lawn, rubbing our eyes and blowing mucus all over the place. The cops thought it was hilarious. No idea if the news actually used the shot.

16. From brandnamenerd:

The only set I've worked on is my SO's full-length film (she co-wrote, co-directed and stars in it! They're still editing it, and intend to hit up film festivals ASAP). I did whatever they needed me to do, with no experience. Some nights I held a make-shift boom mic, other nights I was shopping in the background, another night I hid behind the door with a light and just held it open so they could get their shot. Real indie, no budget, but it's been fun.

Shooting schedule was weird as it was only nights and weekends and heavily depended on who was around and when. This night was where the other co-director was making his only cameo as a homeless man that's taking a sh*t on the subway, and the way things worked out, we were pulling an all-nighter. I got to hold the camera for this scene, early morning, most of the subway cars are pretty empty.

For anyone not in NYC, bars close at 4am, so filming at 4:30 am on the train, you get people that are still drunk and making their way home. Co-director (Rob) is wrapping up his shot and turns to come back to our end of the car when three really drunk guys think that Rob's actually homeless and is afraid of them and try to lure him back over.

It was weird, Rob politely stated that we were working on a film project and him turning around has nothing to do with them, when they start yelling at us to come back over. I don't know what they wanted, but so far, the only time I've been afraid on the subway.

17. From picksandchooses:

I was carrying equipment / acting as guide/ grunt work for guys shooting high-risk skiing video near Alta, Utah. I mostly carried stuff then stood around a lot, but it paid well.

One of the skiers was supposed to ski out off a rock cliff and land on a steep section below. It really wasn't much of a gigantic leap or anything, I could have done it myself. Still, he had to get a pretty good amount of speed up before he went off the cliff just to clear some rocks and land on the snow-covered steep part. He was a superb skier, there was nothing to it for this guy.

Except something went wrong, he sort of nearly stopped just as he went off the cliff. He dribbled off the 15-foot cliff and went headfirst into the boulder-sized rocks below. He got bloody and knocked out cold. Now the problem was getting him out of there.

Long story short: I had a radio and called the ski patrol from the nearby ski resorts. No helicopter available. It took almost an hour for the patrol to get there. The guy had become conscious a few times but he was definitely out of it. The patrol took him down the hill on the sled straight to a waiting ambulance. He was in the hospital for about 2 weeks. I ran into another of the skiers the summer after that and he said the guy was never quite the same after that; a bit of a speech slur and seemingly slowed thinking. No one quite figured out what had slowed him down so much, exactly at the wrong moment.

18. From Bulliwyf:

News Videographer here - worst thing I experienced on the job was arriving to a hit and run seconds before emergency crews arrived.

Heard the call on the scanner at about 3:30am about someone hit by a car, figured what the hell, it was a slow night and head over even though I'm technically off shift.

Pull up about a block to a half-block back, on an alley/side street so I'm not blocking the street, but can still see my news truck so I can keep an eye on it as well as get out of there fast if something else happens. Also lets me be a bit more discreet.

First thing I see as I climb out and start getting gear ready is an empty street, police cars and ambulance pulling up, body of a female in the street, male screaming and crying at the police to do something as they haul him over to the curb. I'm immediately shooting everything I can: shoot and move, shoot and move. Trying to be discreet by not running up and getting in people's faces, but still getting full coverage.

I watch as the police tape off the area, the guy is crying on the curb, paramedics load the girl up on the stretcher and I can tell on their faces its not good. I position myself to get the shot of the ambulance racing off down the street with the lights going, and they do...for about 2 blocks. And then they slow down, lights get turned off and they pull over to the side for a minute, and then drive off at normal speed.

Its obvious why, and everyone there sees it and knows why. And in my head, all I can do is grin (internally) b/c the shot is beautiful - straight down the road, sun just starting to make the horizon a nice pink to offset the darker streets, ambulance hauling a*s with its lights lighting everything up around it.

I finish up my cover shots, wave to the officer in charge that I need to get a comment (even him saying we have no info is better than not clipping up at all), get the usual comment (an incident happened, to early to say any details, no further comment). I start packing up, and all of a sudden someone grabs my arm and yanks me around, its the guy and he starts screaming at me - "Did I get my entertainment?" "Am I happy yet?" "F*cking media jackal..." He's borderline incoherent at this point from grief and alcohol.

Cops quickly peel him off me and I got out of there pretty damn fast.

What made the whole thing even more f*cked up was I essentially just saw a woman die in the street, got screamed at by her boyfriend for essentially just doing my job, and then on the ride back to the station was singing along with the radio and had waffles when I went home - none of it bothered me at all.

And just b/c if I don't say it, someone will ask: car that hit the girl was stolen and found ditched later that day, police discovered the driver was some guy off his meds and didn't even know who he was when they picked him up, much less who or where he was when he hit the girl (or that he had even hit the girl), the guy and girl were both intoxicated and were wandering back and forth in the road, hence the reason she was hit in the first place.

I got a kudos from the head of the station for getting the "scoop" on the story since none of the other stations bothered to show up (or staffed anyone at that time of the day) as well as how I handled the situation and how well the shots turned out - specifically that ambulance shot.

19. From cats4daze:

I was ACing on, not a documentary, but a short narrative film, we were in the middle of a take outside the entrance of a downtown bar when an old, homeless man cruises by on rascal scooter and asks loudly "y'all wanna buy some diapers?!" The AD said "sir, we're in the middle of a take, please be quiet". And the guy responded with "I DON'T GIVE A F*CK!" And kept on rolling.

20. From Wu-Tang_Killa_Bees:

We were filming a documentary about Furries. The film doesn't focus on sex or talk about it a great deal, but we would not cover the fandom fully if we didn't at least discuss it a little bit. We were at the headquarters of Bad Dragon, a sex toy company that makes "fantasy" toys, e.g. dragons, animals, etc and is well-known within the fandom. They have this gel thing that is an artificial jizz to be used with certain toys. During the interview, the CEO put some in his hands, rubbed it around, and continually played with it. There we are, five 20-something kids, sitting in silence while watching a man play with artificial jizz. It was kind of hilarious.

Shamelesss self promotion: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zaGFsfoEpGw&t=4s

Whether you live in an apartment building or a house, most of us have experienced "that crazy neighbor," and if you haven't, you're probably that neighbor...

Sharing a building with thin walls can present a lot of challenges such as the upstairs neighbors that seem to be rearranging their furniture every single day, the stomper, the couple that's always fighting, or any musician that decides their apartment is also their performance arena. In a neighborhood, there's usually at least one older neighbor who fully fits the "get off my lawn" stereotype according to the kids, or one particularly nosy, binoculars-adorned neighbor who stirs the pot of gossip.

While neighbors can definitely be helpful if you're locked out, out of sugar for a very important baked good, or need someone to keep an eye on your packages from porch pirates, the bad ones definitely stand out. If you're someone who regularly attends your neighbors' dinner parties and has an overall pleasant experience with the people you share your building or neighborhood with, consider yourself very lucky.

So, when a recent Reddit user asked, "Who was the weirdest neighbor you’ve ever had and what made them so strange?" people were ready to share.

1.

I had a neighbor across the hall who painted everything orange. She spray painted her entire car orange. Her apartment windows and blinds were orange. I got a glimpse inside her place while walking by once and sure enough, everything inside was orange. She never spoke and was an elderly lady. Lived alone from what I could tell. - Smmaxter

2.

We had this neighbor who we didn't talk to much. He played music really loud and it was annoying as heck. They got a microphone for Christmas. I think you can guess how I know that. Anyways, we didn't talk much until the day he was moving out. He was explaining to us that he was "Moving to Nashville cause this city don't have any soul." My husband and I quote that to each other all the time because we think it's hilarious. - monarchsugar

3.

Nudist family. Theres a fence around the pool but we both have elevated decks. So when we're on our deck theyre just there. Buck naked. They dont care. We're immune to it. They're funny. Our boys get along with their son. We watch out for each other...just a weird situation. - OptymusPrimal

4.

We used to have a neighbour that would vacuum his lawn at least twice a week. - FrknTerfd

5.

Underpanty Man. So named because he was always wearing a speedo. Mowing the lawn? Speedo. Getting the mail? Speedo. Petitioning the HOA to allow greater variations in paint colors? Speedo. We aligned politically because he was fighting the good fight for individual rights, but I never had a serious conversation with him. - UintaGirl

6.

Used to live next door to a little old lady who went for a walk every day carrying a baseball bat "to fight off the dangerous dog". Found out later that the "dangerous dog" was a great dane that wagged it's tail at her once. She was weird in other ways too but that one stayed with me. - Adventurous-Speech81

7.

A neighbor that wanted to kill my chickens - jose5c

8.

We had some neighbors behind us that lived in a duplex/twin. Creepy Neighbor had lived there for years when nice lady neighbor moved in. Her first morning in her new home she hears from the other side of the bathroom, “I am Beelzebub”. Freaked her out. Turns out Creepy Neighbor was a Satanist who was giving him a pep talk from the other side of the wall. Dude drove around in a mini van with all kinds of small Satan-y things mounted to the dashboard. Needless to say Creepy Neighbor was not a great neighbor to her. But he brought us homemade Christmas cookies every year using his family’s heirloom recipe. - Emebust

9.

This dude was 30 or in his late 20s when I moved in. The entire 5 and a half years I lived in that apartment complex he did nothing with his life, he didn't went to college or had a work. He still acted like a teenager and would drive his poor mom crazy, like he legit would throw tantrums whenever she wouldn't give him allowance. He also hanged out with a bunch of teenagers. I have a lot of stories of him waking me up in the middle of the night yelling at his mom things like "Stop controlling my life" or "That's so unfair of you to talk about like that of my friends" and the best one "I'm calling my dad" - babyishAuri

10.

Family that lives on bulding B of the complex on the 9th floor have their windows covered all the time, I never saw their windows open and it's been like that for years. I think they're vampires. - _amplifier_worship

11.

Not a neighbor but a roommate (22), she will baby talk to her cat for 3 hours after she gets home and she has this plastic skeleton that she takes with her everywhere she goes like puts it in the front seat (which no ones allowed to sit because its the skeletons spot (I’m serious)) and buckles it up and gives it a kiss, and she talks to it like it’s her boyfriend. Her room is next to mine and I can hear her talking to it saying how much she loves it and how it’s the best thing to come into her life. She even f*cking showers with it. It’s really f*cking weird - TrystenConn

12.

nothing really suspicious about the person themselves, but we used to have a neighbor who would have tons of really nice cars drive by or parked outside their house everyday. turned out they were running a region-wide investment scam. - supersouther

13.

We have a neighbor who mows her lawn every. Single. Day. Even when it hasn't rained for awhile and the grass isn't growing particularly quickly. Some days I swear I see her out there twice. The only exception is winter months when there's snow. - KuruKIE97

14.

I had a neighbor growing up that was a COMPLETE A*S to every kid in the cul-de-sac. If we climbed the trees he would yell at us. If we walked through the rocks along the sidewalk he would yell at us. If we rode our bikes on the sidewalk in front of his house he would yell at us. He was just generally a pr*ck to everyone all the time. With the exception of Halloween. Every. Single. Year. This crotchety old man who was likely a widower and lived alone handed out KING SIZE CANDY BARS TO THE KIDS THAT CAME TO HIS DOOR. He’d often even let us pick two or three. To this day I still wonder about him. - Waifu-Box

15.

Had a neighbor yell across the street "hey Mooseballs" thought that was kind of strange. Middle of the afternoon just leaving to get a coffee and all the sudden I'm being haild as Mooseballs. My response was "thank you?" Wasn't sure what to make of it so assumed compliment. - MovingStairs

16.

Once had a neighbour who ran down the street shirtless and barefoot trying to hit his brother with a fully decorated Christmas tree. - Ungreat

17.

Lady next door to my old house was constantly looking in the windows that faced her side of the house. She wasn't subtle about it, either. She would stand in her driveway and just stare into our windows. One was my bedroom window, the other for a spare room/junk room. She also let her dogs out to charge the fence any time I was out cutting the grass. I learned when the guy who lived on the other side of her got foreclosed on that she hated people living on either side of her. She did not want neighbors, period. Then why the hell did you choose to buy a house in the city? - SundayMorningTrisha

18.

Every Sunday he showered on his balcony with the hose - nia_likes_nuggets

Standing someone up on your wedding day in front of all of your friends and family is probably the most savage (not to mention expensive) way to break off an engagement. And yet, it does happen. And not just in straight-to-Netflix romantic comedies.

Someone asked Reddit: "did you, or someone you know, ever attend a wedding where the bride or groom was left at the altar? How did it turn out?" These 15 people share stories of what happened at weddings where the bride or groom was a no-show:

1.) From [deleted]:

My entire fourth grade class was in attendance at our teacher's wedding where she was left at the altar.

The whole situation was ugly. My teacher was the bride and was about 3/4 down the aisle when the groom decided he couldn't do it. He walked off to the side and at first my teacher and her father didn't notice and kept walking, smiling radiantly. There was about a minute of really solid confusion (last minute cold feet? bathroom emergency?) before everyone realized what was going on. My teacher was whisked out of the church and an announcement was made that there was not going to be a wedding. This happened the second or third week of June; she didn't come back for the last week of school.

2.) From PvP_Noob:

Long time ago I went to my Father's wedding. It would have been his 4th. They got to the altar and mutually decided to call it off. We still had the reception as there was no reason to waste all the booze and food.

They stayed together as a couple another month or two. It's sad I don't even remember her name. Then again, out of the 5 marriages my father had only two of them lasted more than three years.

3.) From Theycalledmeishmael:

My wife's friend ran during Mass. We sat there shocked, not knowing what to do or say. Do we just leave? What is the etiquette? Is there even etiquette to follow? She came back after about 10 minutes, after she and her mom got her wedding gown off and on again. Turns out, after drinking, greasy food, and nerves she was experiencing severe GI distress and didn't want to chance it. Years later, we still laugh. At the time, it was one of the most awkward things to sit through.

Yes, still happily married. She did tell the groom, but the rest of us had no idea until the reception. The bride is pretty blunt and that's how we know what really happened.

4.) From agentkatsumoto:

This was sometime in the 70s. My uncle in India was attending the wedding of some not-so-close friends (totally common to have 1,000 people at a wedding with many people that barely know the couple in attendance). The bride was left at the altar and literally standing on the stage and waiting while everyone was watching. My uncle stepped up and said he'd marry her. He must have felt some sudden rush of Bollywood go through him. Anyway, she said yes and they are happily married to this day.

5.) From iRedditWhilePooping:

My pastor once officiated a wedding. He had done all the premarital counselling for the couple, they seemed good to go and fine. Got to the altar, he did his opening prayer and welcome. He gets to the part when he says, "Do you take this woman to be your wife" and the guy looked at her, back and him and said "No."

Pastor laughed a little and repeated the question thinking he misunderstood, but the guy stopped him and said, "No, I don't." He took the groom aside to a back room, where the guy essentially said that he couldn't do it, that the bride and her mother had manipulated the whole wedding and he had been too chicken to stand up to her before, but that he couldn't throw his life away. They brought in both families, and had a very real conversation, and then the pastor had to go back out and explain to the very uncomfortable congregation that there would be no wedding today, that the guests could help themselves to some refreshments, but that the rest of the evenings events were cancelled.

6.) From YakCat:

I was left at the altar. We stayed together only to have him abandon me at the hospital little over a year and a half later.

We were together for 6 years at that point and engaged for 4. There was no signs that it was going to happen.

The whole wedding was both of us and our friends making it. We'd get together on Sundays for BBQ and planning. He was so excited. He'd talk about how awesome it was going to be to have a small ceremony then a picnic and a big bonfire. How we didn't need any of that other stuff since our love was real.

After an hour of waiting, it was obvious. He called me and said he just couldn't do it. I stood before everyone and explained that he got cold feet but we can still have the picnic! Which we did. I walked around in my wedding dress joking about his cold feet. After all, 6 years I knew him well.

The weirdest thing? We never brought it up. Like ever. He was watching tv when I got back from our wedding like nothing was unusual. He moved out a week later but two months later asked to come back. I let him. Life continued.

A year and about a half later I got in a bad car wreck. I was in a coma for a bit. He came to visit but as soon as I was up and starting the first rounds of surgery (spinal issues), he told me he just didn't love me enough to go through with being there for me.

I acted the same way I did when he left me at the altar. He left me in the hospital just like at the altar. It was almost 8 years I was with him. Our families were close. I honestly thought we'd come together again. Never did.

I healed and grew emotionally. It's so hard when half of you is missing and we had grown so much into one another. I took classes. Learned to kayak. Cried. Got new friends. Went dancing. Dated.

I found my husband 2 years after the other abandoned me. I learned that having history with someone and feeling familiar and safe isn't always enough. I have never had more fun with anyone like I do with my husband. We live an adventurous and happy life.

The life I would've had with my ex was predictable but that's not what I wanted. Who I was and who I wanted was just not him, but I didn't know that. He did.

His abandoning me at the hospital and leaving me at the altar was the greatest gift I never wanted.

7.) From Anitsisqua:

Yes! My friend's groom-to-be left her at the altar. He took the tickets to Hawaii for their honeymoon and instead went with his brother.

She spent a year dating around before he begged her to take him back, saying that he was wrong. He - a very well-off young lawyer - bought her a huge rock and paid for a lavish wedding and she agreed.

They were married soon after and now have a baby daughter.

8.) From oo00Linus00oo:

I attended a wedding where the Bride was "left at the altar." Man, it was sad, and odd.

There was a pretty large audience. Soon enough the time to start comes and goes. Everyone in the audience is sitting there waiting at least 30-60 minutes after the ceremony was supposed to begin - all with no official word from the wedding party or why there was such a long delay.

Rumors started going around. People were saying that one of the groomsmen stained his shirt, and a bunch of other stuff that indicated nothing serious. Finally, the Bride's father, tears in his eyes, gets up on stage to announce that the Groom has had a change of heart.

Needless to say it was pretty shocking. But he told everyone to go on ahead to the reception and eat (full dinner) because the food had alrady been paid for so someone might as well enjoy it. I couldn't believe it, but the Bride actually showed up at the reception and greeted EVERYONE - with a smile, no less. The Groom did not make an appearance.

The Bride got married a few years later (to a guy with the same first name, oddly), but the groom is still single to this day. Apparently, he was never trully ready to get married, but he couldn't bring himself to say anything until the pressure finally got to him on the Big Day. He got a LOT of flack from friends (and strangers who didn't even know them), naturally, but the two of them ended up agreeing that since he wasn't ready, then it was a good thing that he did not commit. Though he definitely regrets the way he led her on.

The strangest part of the whole day? The wedding was on April 1st.

9.) From purplepatch:

My dad went to a society wedding in the 90s in the UK. The ceremony went ahead without incident and they had got to the speeches. The groom stood up, said "I'd like to thank my beautiful wife and my brilliant best man, as they've been f***ing each other for the past 6 months, cheers!"

He downed his drink and walked out the back to stunned silence.

Apparently the father of the bride went round putting the corks back in the bottles shouting "Parties over, everyone out". He seemed to think he could get money back on the booze.

10.) From theonlyjadegreen:

This actually happened to me. The guy I was supposed to marry, just didn't show up at all. He called all of his friends and family on his side, and told them not to bother showing up because he wouldn't be there. We waited around til about an hour after the wedding started, and finally got a text message saying he wasn't coming. So I got to look like a jerk by telling my family 'oh, sorry, there won't be a wedding today.' It was mortifying. And to top things off, my son was asking me why his daddy didn't want to marry mommy. Very hard to explain that to a 2 year old. :(

11.) From Thegoddamnpatman:

I was a wedding coordinator at a Catholic church in Manhattan. Our Church was booked for a large wedding party from Connecticut , they told us to expect at least 500 people as the bride and the groom came from large Italian families. When the day of their wedding came, the only people who showed up were members of the grooms side of the family. It was Odd because we had seen the bride the night before at the wedding rehearsal and everything seemed fine. But the next day, the bride and her party were no-shows. The groom tried his best to keep his compsure. In an effort to track down the bride, the groom had his friends and family and myself call anyone who might have a clue as to where she went. Minutes passed, and eventually hours passed. The groom begged me to let the current party stay in hopes that his bride to be would show up. I let his party stay an extra 15 minutes before i had to kick them all out and prepare for the next wedding that afternoon. We never learned of what happened to the bride. Her absence remains a mystery today.

12.) From [deleted]:

I was at the wedding for one of my sisters friends who was the bride. The Bride never showed up at the wedding and no one could find her. After several hours the groom and his family all went home. Turned out the bride went for a wild night of partying and sleapt with some guy she met at a club. She was passed out drunk at his place all day long before she came around and realized she missed her own wedding. She was out with a friend that did nothing to stop her from getting wasted and screwing around (I think her freind let her get carried away because she thought the bride wouldn't have been a good wife and figured it was the easiest way to get the couple to split up).

The father of the bride was mad as hell about the expense of the wedding that came out of his pocket. The groom has since moved on with his own life, discovering the woman he was going to marry had cheated on him the night before their wedding made him break it off. He hasn't gotten married but I hear he's dating someone and it looks serious enough they may get married soon. The Bride has been having problems trying to get the respect of her family back after that stunt. She once tried to talk to me when I was single to see if we could go out. I told her flat out I had no interest in dating a woman who cheats like she does. We've not spoken since, much to my relief.

13.) From punchyourbuns:

At my mom's wedding to my (ex-)stepdad, she realized once at the altar that she'd forgotten the rings in her jacket pocket. Since she knew where she hung her jacket (under a couple others) it was a lot easier to retrieve them herself rather than try and explain. So she says she'd be right back, (but no one heard her) and takes off running back down the aisle. My (ex-)stepdad's bestman leaned over and says to him, "I don't think she's coming back..."

Everyone was just shocked and didn't know what to say or do.

She returned shortly after. Still a funny moment for the wedding video. Too bad she didn't actually bail, would have saved her a divorce.

14.) From cpxh:

Buddy of mine was engaged to this girl who no one liked. She pretty much had him on a leash. He also had to carry around a man purse full of her stuff.

Anyways, they were getting married and we all were too polite to tell him what we really thought about her.

Morning of the wedding his grandmother, who had literally just met his fiance, told him and I shit you not this is a direct quote "I always figured you'd marry a c**t."

Got about halfway through the wedding ceremony, and then he just booked it. Didn't say anything, just walked off the alter and left, mid-wedding.

He did end up marrying her though, but it was months later.

15.) From bong_sau_bob:

It happened to my sister. He lost his bottle and didn't show. He was a turd anyway. I as one of her three brothers joined the other two on a bit of a manhunt but we didnt find him, he was apparently already out of town. My sister didn't really react at first but my father, several thousand out of pocket, wasn't so quiet.

The grooms family, friends and relatives all apologetically and sheepishly melted away as our lot went on for the meal and a drink.

Our father ended up being arrested for basically threatening to wipe out his family over the whole thing a few weeks later and my sister held her head up throughout, came out with her dignity and carried on.

If you're out there Tim, we still haven't forgotten what a cowardly sh*t you are.

Good news for all of the English speakers reading this (which is probably most of you, because this article is in English)!

If you go abroad to a non-English speaking country, it'll be easy to become one of the popular kids, as you are already familiar with a lot of the slang

Americans have picked up "bon appetit," "bon voyage," and other French phrases, and the French drop English words in coversation as well. Non-English speakers shared the English words they use in conversation, and it provides interesting insights into how Texas is perceived in Europe.

1. It's getting Texas up in here.

Norwegians use 'Texas' as an adjective in describing parties, as in, 'That party was Texas!' In this context it means both 'huge and epic' and 'probably embarrassing for everybody involved. -thosearesomewordsReport

2. Przepraszam, not przepraszam.

In Poland we often use "sory" (pronounced a bit differently than sorry) instead of przepraszam, guess why. -lapishelperReport

3. Ik laugheded.

Dutch speaking person here. We have loads of loanwords from English. Even verbs. The interesting part is that the Dutch conjugation rules still apply for verbs loaned from English.

"I deleted" becomes "Ik deletete"

"I've gamed all day" becomes "Ik heb de hele dag gegamed"

Not a verb but "The backed-up data" becomes "De geback-upte gegevens" -ColorMeColorful

4. A literal interpretation.

In Argentina a one night stand is a "touch and go." -pinkducktape8

5. A cheat for getting around English-speaking censors.

In France, a lot of "Ouat Ze Feuk" (wtf) -Hyperbawl

6. Hey CEO, CEO Italiano.

Italian here, we (mis)use A LOT: from cocktail to smartphone, freezer, shampoo, jobs act (kill me!!), exit poll, welfare, startup, manager, full time, freelance, CEO (no one knows what it stands for), target, brand, makeup, outfit, playback, live, teenager... -vodkasolution

7. J'aime le brunch.

The French say: le selfie, le feedback, le brunch. -bobbie-m

8. Even Oma is okay.

Sorry,' 'ok,' and 'cool' are the most common ones in Czech. Even my grandma uses those. -prObably_nuts__me

9. Cheers!

Visiting a girlfriend in Spain, her friends loved saying "Kill It" when finishing a drink.
To them it was the funniest way to take shots. -Faaabs

10. More effective than "we're hanging out."

In Korea there are a few English words used but they rarely have the same exact meaning. For example, “panty” is used to mean underwear but it is a gender neutral term (essentially what underwear is in english). There are some words are that are used as slang like “some”. A “some” relationship is essentially when two people are interested in each other but haven’t had the girlfriend/boyfriend talk yet. -pwb_118Report

11. So random.

I'm Croatian and the English words that we use a lot are 'random,' 'accidentally,' and 'officially.' -princessA611

12. But what do the Swiss call Swiss rolls?

I'm a french speaker and here in switzerland I hear a lot of english words as well!

• cringe • awkward • sorry • bye • cool • fast food/junk food • design • game art/digital art, speed paint • cute • creepy

And a lot of other! In fact a lot of young people use to use english sentences for being cool! -ixigrekke

13. Why history class matters:

Pakistani here, pretty much every other sentence in Urdu spoken by people that live in urban areas has at least some English in it. Sometimes whole sentences, sometimes just a swear word. Mainly because of two reasons: we (along with India and Bangladesh) used to be a British colony until 1947, and also American media influence is pretty much everywhere.

Fridge, light, table, phone, internet, pistol, shirt, pants, shorts (we use the British "knickers"), school, college, backpack (bag), camera, movie etc. This list could pretty much go on for paragraphs. -ExtacyRap

14. Makes sense.

We say “Make sense” a lot in Sweden, but modified to be more Swedish. We say it more like “make:a sense”, which basically substitutes a “to” before “make” by adding the “a” at the end. Pronounced “Make ah sense”. -Targaryen-ish

15. Finns and Borat say "high five!"

In Finnish, we use "high five" pretty regularly, as well as"fine", in the sense of something being acceptable; "Se olis mulle ihan fine" = "It would be fine with me". WTF is also common, with the letters pronounced in the Finnish way. -Mipellys

16. The baby gang goes to the Texas party.

There are lots of English words used in Italian, sometimes idiosyncratically: "public relations", "flash" (for USB drive), "feeling" (for romantic chemistry). The list is long with lots of applications to IT and marketing fields, fashion too. There's also some weird turns-of-phrases like:

"Baby gang" = group of underage delinquents

"Baby parking" = a nursery or pre-school. <-- This is my favorite because it sounds so wrong, but in the end it's so right! -SuperPantaleon

Marriage is a walk in the park. Sometimes it's beautiful and peaceful and other times the park is on fire with no relief in sight. Whatever ups and downs your marriage is going through right now, the important thing to remember is to keep laughing. These marriage memes are the perfect dose of humor for you and your spouse. They are accurate, relatable, and of course hilarious.

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It's safe to say that as a parent, no matter what, you're going to mess your kid up somehow, even if it's small.

A recent Reddit thread asked mental health professionals to share the seemingly harmless parenting practices that can make a big impact. No parent is perfect, but these are good to know.

1. Parents should admit they're human.

The biggest one I see is parents who refuse to take accountability for their mistakes. Honestly, it's not a huge deal if a parent f*** up-- no one's perfect. It becomes a big deal when they refuse to admit they did something wrong and then blame their kid as a way of covering up their mistakes. - strayedoggo

2. This person has a whole laundry list.

Blame their insecurities on their child.

Project things they never got to do onto their child.

Put their relationship strains onto their child.

Make the child their counselor when they in fact need a professional that can give them some slaps of reality.

Refusing to acknowledge the child as their own person and not the parent's property or item that says something about the parent (if that makes sense)

- Worked in an acute psychiatric hospital for 4 years+ - langdonscare

3. Consistency is important.

-Choosing when to give love to your child or making them "earn" it.

-Coming in and out of their lives on a whim

-Constantly bringing up body image issues especially theirs (but then buy them junk food) - islandorisntland

4. Figuring out when to punish your kid is a tough balance.

Punishing them for making honest mistakes, causing anxiety if they aren’t perfect. Additionally, never giving them consequences for anything at all, creating a sense of entitlement. - lack-of-creativity

5. Kids need praise.

Only acknowledging when they do something wrong, and rarely praising them. Again, more anxiety about not being perfect. Additionally, only praising their efforts in things you like, rather than praising all their efforts. - lack-of-creativity

6. Abuse is obviously going to mess your kid up.

Being aware of abuse and not only allowing it to continue, but to do nothing to advocate for your child, or trying to sweep it under the rug. Or being the one perpetrating the abuse. PTSD and all its components come into play here. - lack-of-creativity

7. Adult conversations are for adults only.

Sharing your adult problems with them. More anxiety when they feel like they have to fix your problems. There is such a thing as “adult conversations.” To clarify, I don’t believe there is a golden age to talk with your kids about mature topics. All kids handle this differently.

Some like to help and be part of the family decisions, and some cannot handle when they can’t help. It’s one thing to talk about financials with teens so they understand money doesn’t grow on trees. It’s another thing to talk to a 6 year old about how you can’t pay rent and might end up homeless. - lack-of-creativity

8. Your kids aren't your do-overs for life.

Projecting your hopes and dreams on them. Maybe little Johnny doesn’t want to be a lawyer. Let’s not riddle him with depression because he hates his life because you forced him to live out your dream instead of his own. - lack-of-creativity

9. Acknowledge your kids' problems, even if they seem small.

do not try to downplay their problems by saying that they aren’t a big deal. For example if a child comes to a parent and says that they are worried about something only to be told that their problem isn’t even that serious. It all comes down to age, what a 5 year old thinks is stressful has the same feeling as to what a 40 year old thinks is stressful. The only difference is the perspective. - OgreDarner4692

10. Parents need to set a good example.

kids learn how to treat themselves, hold boundaries, self-care, etc from how their parents treat themselves. Parents: you are a child’s model. Model self-respect and self-care. Hold yourself to high standards without denigrating yourself. You get the idea. - Prize-Trifle-9537

11. Criticism is no good.

the worst thing a parent can do is criticize/provide inconsistent attachment. Most of us go to therapy to resolve issues around feeling worthy of what we need/want. Parents who shame their kids for mistakes, or even for something like crying when upset, can create these kinds of problems around emotional regulation. You don’t need to coddle a tantrum, but shaming it is not a great way to teach kids to self-soothe.

It is, however, VERY difficult not to treat your kids the way your parents treated you. I can’t tell you how hard it is not to scream back at a screaming kid if that’s how you were treated. There are bio-social factors that were wired into your brain long before you were old enough to procreate. Therefore self care, admitting mistakes and getting your own therapy to resolve your own issues is key (see above). - Prize-Trifle-9537

12. Humility is important.

Admit your own mistakes. My parents have never once in my life told me “I’m sorry I did that” and my GOD is every single conversation we have a f******* battle because they just refuse. To. Apologise. Seriously, teach your kids some humility. - dckheadjonez

13. Praise, praise, praise!

So many things, but the biggest one that I see is not praising their kid enough. If I want my parents to take anything away from my teachings it is that praise goes a long way. Who doesn't like being told they are good and that they did a good job? Praise for being, "you are such an awesome kid! I love you so much." And praise for doing, "Thank you so much for doing your chores. It is such a big help and I appreciate it so much."

Praise is a life changer builds self esteem, self confidence, pride in oneself and one's work. Lack of praise can make the opposite. Too many times parents feel like chores should be expected, and to an extent yes, but still telling them you appreciate it makes them want to keep doing it and motivates them. - SeaCccat

14. This is a big one.

Don't punish your child for the behavior you asked them for. For example, if you want your kid to talk to you more don't yell at them when they share things that are scary and uncomfortable. If you want your child to spend more time with the family don't make sh***y comments about them when they come down. - littledinosaurtickle

15. This is so common.

Don't parentify your child. Don't tell them about your bills, relationships. what their a**hole parent did. Don't use them as an outlet - it is not their job to support you. - littledinosaurtickle

16. It's counterintuitive, but be nice when punishing your kid.

Don't withdraw your affection as punishment. Love from a parent is a right, not a privilege. Doesn't matter how much trouble they get into - you can discipline and love a child at the same time. - littledinosaurtickle

17. If a kid is seeking attention, that means they need attention...

Credentials: I am a therapist specializing in treating traumatized children. I also see children who aren’t traumatized and adults.

Answer: Characterizing behavior as bratty, manipulative, or attention-seeking, especially out loud where your kids can hear you. Kids want one, single, goddamn thing on this earth, and that’s to please their caregivers. If they knew how to do it reliably with good behavior, THEY WOULD. If there are a lot of problem behaviors, there’s a lot of problem parenting. - thegreattemptation

18. There is such a thing as too much praise.

Constantly praise them for things they haven’t done. Search it up, it’s called the Golden Child syndrome - YeeeEeeskrrrt

19. Talk to your kid!

I'm not a mental health professional, but I worked in a level 3 lock down facility for kids to rehabilitate for a few months. The amount of kids shipped off in the middle of the night simply because their parents didn't want to deal with it was unreal. And then you find out this is what the parents did with everything. Any time the kids had any kind of problem, no matter how small, the parents would avoid dealing with and wonder how their 15 year old got hooked on meth.

If your kid has a problem, talk to them. Let them vent, let them be sad, or upset or confused. Ask your kids how they're doing and actually mean it, open up those lines of communication because I saw too many kids say, "its not like anyone cares what I do anyway" and it's so sad to hear. - iwantbutter

20. This is an easy way to make a difference.

I am a licensed play therapist. It's so simple, but just acknowledging your child's feelings. "I can see you're feeling sad." "You're angry at me right now." "You're scared." It helps children so, so, so much with mental health in the future, because they grow into adults who understand and can express their emotions.

It gives children a foundation of empathy and understanding from which to build healthy relationships with other people in the future. It's critical and only takes a minute. - pishpasta

21. This person has a great list.

Ex-counsellor here.

Not allowing ‘negative’ emotions like anger, jealousy, etc. Teach them those are normal, and what to do with your emotions.

Pressure to perform. Don’t try and make your kids something they’re not, especially if it’s what you wished you were.

Never letting them find the consequences of their mistakes. You might want to protect them, but you’re stopping them from learning how to avoid mistakes, and how to recover from them, and how to deal if other people make mistakes.

Not talking about awkward topics. Sex, bullying, addictions, masturbation, racism, cheating, classism, body image, etc aren’t often comfortable to talk about, but it’s important they learn from somewhere other than the internet.

Not dealing with and owning your own s***. We’ve all got problems, best to deal with it rather than perpetuate cycles. Find a therapist for yourself, and be open with your kid that you know, and you’re trying your best. It gives them space to learn grace and how to deal with their issues. - motherofplants81

22. Kids don't ask to be born...

Don't expect your kid to kiss the ground you walk on and see you as a god for providing food, clothes, and a roof. That's literally the bare minimum required by law.

Don't drill into their heads they owe you gratitude for giving them life. They didn't have a choice in that matter.

Don't treat them like a burden. Again it was your choice to have a child. Shouldn't have become a parent if you couldn't handle the responsibility

Don't make your love conditional, only to be given when you deign it so. Not only is that cruel but it sets them up for failure in future relationships

Clearly I could go on but these would probably be my tops - silvermoonchan

In the age of helicopter parents, it can be tough to tell whether a mom or dad is going too far. One teacher has taken to the internet for advice regarding a dust-up in her classroom after a mom requested that she separate her daughter from a "poor" girl in class. Yikes.

The teacher sets the stage: rich girl Hannah's mom has a bit of a hovering problem.

First year teaching (second grade) I’ll try to make this quick.

So let’s call the two girls Hannah and kelly. Now Hannah’s mom is on the PTA, very involved, it’s clear they have money, and overall her kid is great. Now I noticed Hannah’s mom being really hovery over her in the classroom when she would volunteer but whatever nothing crazy..

A girl named Kelly cried because Hannah said she couldn't be friends with her:

Hannah and kelly have became friends and last week Kelly was crying I asked her what was wrong and she told me Hannah said she couldn’t be friends with her anymore because she didn’t have a high Quality enough family that her family was junkie.

The teacher intervened, talking to Hannah:

Our school has a zero tolerance bullying and exclusion rule. When I went over to talk to Hannah she explained that her mom told her she couldn’t be friends with Kelly for those reasons but that she really wanted to. I told Hannah her mom didn’t make the rules for my classroom.

She got an email from Hannah's mom:

Well I ended up getting a nasty email from Hannah’s mom saying that it’s her kid, she will decide who’s friends with, it she has to switch her classes she will, and that she doesn’t want her kid around kids with unstable backgrounds. When I asked what she meant by unstable and what exactly the issue was she said said that girls family lives in a junky apartment, they are poor, they’re young and they have no college degree, and they are not a quality family.

The teacher was horrified:

This to me disgusting. If she doesn’t allow them to play together outside of school that’s her choice but I’m not playing those games in my second f****** grade classroom.

The teacher agrees with her, but her own parent is on the snobby PTA mom's side:

I took the emails and my concerns to our principal who agreed with me. My own mother told me “parents have that right your being a little bit of an a**”

So lay it on me I guess am I the a**hole here?

The people of the internet agree that the mom has no jurisdiction over the classroom — but some also argued that there might be a better way to solve the problem.

Pighillian says the mom is unequivocally in the wrong:

She’s a terrible mother who will only ruin her daughter’s social life. Like you said, what happens outside the classroom is out of your control but don’t let that kind of prejudiced bully behaviour into your classroom.

Virtual_gnus agreed:

Yep. Tremendous damage. My mom was like this. It took a lot of time and hard work to change how I viewed and interacted with people. I still have my moments, but I'm mostly normal and I am usually able to stop the thoughts before they become words or actions.

Yoshivoicebottomtext asked a question:

she can't really expect you to enforce this in the classroom right? what a witch

And the teacher responded:

Oh no part of her email was about how if I see them together I need to separate them. Both the counselor and principal told me they will make sure to keep the girls in separate classes though for the next coming years just to avoid more tears

Wind-river7 says this mom should lose her place on the PTA:

I would talk to the principal about having this woman doing volunteer work in your classroom. If she can't control herself around second graders, she may need to be reassigned to volunteer elsewhere.

And catttmommm had a suggestion:

As a more experienced teacher, I think you could have handled it differently. I might have said something like, "even if we aren't friends outside of school, we can still be kind to everybody in our classroom community." What you said undermines her mom's authority, and while I think her mom is wrong, she's still her mom, and you don't want to send the message to kids that they can disobey their parents' rules when they aren't around (which is how a kid can easily misinterpret what you said). You are lucky your principal was understanding. Mine would have had a complete conniption.

BarbieIsEpic agreed:

As an experienced teacher, too, I agree. Above would have been the perfect response. Things are always better when there is a unified front. If it became an issue I would have approached the mother, not the child, for clarification. We can all judge the mom, but the truth is that she may have valid reasons (or she could be a total B) and it is her job to guide her child to make good choices, even if we disagree. I would consider reaching out to the mom in a positive way.

And dmcat112 included a petty suggestion that's fun to imagine:

I know you won't do it, but I would want to leak that email & attitude out to every other parent & let them know about Judgy McJudgerson up there on the PTA and see how far her little power trip lasts

So there you have it. Being from a "junky" family is not a valid reason to force a fellow second-grader out of your kid's life.

And you can't control who your kid talks to in class!

I've got 3 reasons for you to laugh this morning: memes, memes, and more memes. This hilarious list will crack you up and make you hate mornings up to 25% less, guaranteed.

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"Here, Kitty Kitty," it looks like ABC is attempting to ride the wave of the "Tiger King"-era of quarantine, as Carole Baskin has been confirmed as a contestant on Season 29 of "Dancing with the Stars."

Some call her an "animal activist," while Joe Exotic loyalists think of her as the tiger captor who traps her employees without pay and allegedly fed her ex-husband to her tigers. Regardless of whether or not you're a Carole Baskin fan, she certainly was a major part of the "first semester" of quarantine. Between attempting sourdough starter, baking towers of banana bread, panicking about the news on Zoom 'Happy Hour,' and sanitizing every surface we've ever touched, Carole Baskin and her "unique" take on the cult-like business of wrangling big cats was a March highlight.

In the Netflix documentary, Baskin was relatively open about her hustle with her fans as she monetizes her Facebook and YouTube channel, which features gems such as this diary segment:

We've seen her wrangle tigers, we've seen her try to explain the disappearance of her ex-husband, so now it only makes sense we all get to watch her learn how to dance? 2020 is a trip.

Here are the funniest tweets we could find from people reacting to the news that Carole Baskin, Queen of Big Cats, will be on "Dancing With the Stars."

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The beauty of pretentious people is they truly don't realize how ridiculous they sound to everyone else. Calling out a pretentious person is usually an exercise in futility, since whatever critique you give will be used as confirmation that your intelligence is inferior.

While most of us have had pretentious moments, or entire years of our lives as teenagers, there are some people who truly elevate the pompous to another comedic level.

In a popular Reddit thread, people shared the most pretentious thing they've ever heard someone say, and annals are endless.

1. From aschatz:

Teaching a student how to do a shoulder roll and she says, "It's too hard for me to bend my back that way because of all the modeling and acting schools I go to."

2. From booohockey:

Quote from my now ex-boyfriend:

"Nobody in the history in the world has ever felt as passionate about anything as I feel about music."

Dude moshes at pop punk shows and can barely play bass.

3. From kingpounce:

"It annoys me when people don't agree with my opinion on books, because I'm an author and I know more about writing than all of you." -Girl who writes fanfiction on Wattpad.

4. From Swegneto:

"I'm just operating at too high a level of consciousness for me to be able to talk to regular people."

• Overheard on a street in Oxford.

5. From Barkingpanther:

"People who have experienced the very best of higher education-like I did- simply operate at a higher level than people who didn't."

I'm glad you're proud of your MIT masters or doctorate or whatever the f*ck you did, but this is a barbecue and you're flipping burgers, not accelerating particles.

6. From Theholycasson:

I work in IT, and we have a board of directors. One of them called up cause a client had a problem with their software. We tried explaining that this was a bug in the software, we had put a fix in for it, but it was going to take some time. He actually used the words 'do you know who I am? Get this done, now'. Luckily there was nothing we could so, so he could go f*ck himself.

7. From TRIGMILLION:

Daughter of the owner of the company complaining to the regular workers making 9-12/hr about how broke she is. Someone said they'd be good with an 1/8th of her salary. She made a little speech about how it's different for her because she has a certain lifestyle she needs to maintain that they wouldn't understand.

8. From Rundeemc:

I was once told by a woman that she only let her dogs drink Smart Water and she would order cases just for her little bundles of joy.

9. From Zigau:

"Eating food should only be about survival, that's why I don't bother putting spices in my cooking, that's only for pretentious elitists."

Like dude...seriously?

Edit: This same guy has been in uni for 4 years now and can only make 2 dishes. Dodgy Chow Mein noodles (No salt or pepper), and "Spicy Risotto" (not spicy at all), where instead of using risotto rice he uses normal rice because "it's cheaper and you can't tell the difference".

Double Edit: I understand it's not called risotto rice, but where we live (In the Netherlands) at your average supermarket, i.e. AH or Plus, You generally don't get more than 4 or 5 types of rice in the rice section, usually being called White, Basmati, Pandan, or Risotto (generally arborio). He was always getting one of the others, generally whichever was on bonus, as the rice that worked better for risotto was usually more expensive. I forgot other countries don't always adhere to these and for that I apologise.

10. From garishbourne:

A friend was over with her new BF. Another girl at my house cut herself doing something and the new BF looked at it and said, "that cut is so modern."

11. From Monkeyfistftw:

"Have you ever been to the cloud district? What am I saying, of course you haven't."

12. From sheareel:

I am an electrician, I was working on lights in a bank. Overheard a woman gesturing towards me to her kid "That's why you want to get good grades, so you don't have a job like that." I usually just ignore stupid people, but I ended up telling her off by quietly stating "You know what? I bet I like my job way more than you like yours, and I probably make more money than you." I was vibrating with anger/adrenaline for a good hour after that.

13. From mpmmuirhead:

"Everyone can afford to eat organic"

She said this after having come back from a 4 month trip to Ethiopia where she met and married a millionaire.

No not everyone can afford to eat organic.

14. From AngelzRod:

Professor: Many of you don't participate in class, is the reading too difficult? Is it a lot?

Pretentious f*ck: Well, I'm a little more academically seasoned so I actually think is quite easy to understand. But that's just me.

15. From SugarRAM:

I work at a Children's Museum. I once heard one mother tell her friend "I don't teach my kids to share because that promotes socialism."

16. From KingSilver:

One time I overheard a freshmen girl say "I'm worried about how I'm going to communicate with other people in the future, because not everyone goes to school for 6 years so most people will not be as smart as me."

17. From charliesinthebushes:

"Pocket change? I just throw that in the dumpster or in the street."

18. From alhelies:

"I do have medical insurance but I won't take my medicine because I don't believe in occidental medicine". This same person also don't use umbrellas because she DOESN'T BELIEVE in umbrellas.

19. From cypressboz:

"It's ok we broke up, he was taking me to Paris for my birthday and I don't even like Paris. You would think if it was a birthday gift it would be somewhere I would WANT to go like somewhere tropical"

Overheard a coworker say this after her boyfriend broke up with and cancelled their Paris trip two days before her birthday.

20. From Fuzzypanda67:

A female acquaintance was complaining her yacht was too big to fit in her spot at the marina. We were 17 at the time. It was her own yacht too, not one she shared with her parents.

The same girl also complained about her parents wanting to move the family to St. Lucia from our small suburban town in New Hampshire.

I always thought the best revenge was replacing someone's coffee creamer with laxatives before a major work presentation. But apparently I was wrong and the best revenge is "a life well-lived." I just hope CVS will let me return these laxatives.

Someone asked women of Reddit: "what's your 'living well is the best revenge' story?" These 19 women share how they got revenge on someone who wronged them by living their best lives:

1.) From Slutty_Noam_Chomsky:

My husband got another woman pregnant in the middle of a planned move across country prompted by a job offer for him. My job transfer came first and I packed our 18 years of combined stuff into boxes, ordered a pod and set off 2200 miles away leaving him to just pack our stuff into the box. 2 weeks into my new job and new house he signed the lease on, he calls me up and tells me he fell in love with another woman. (Not the pregnant part.)

He then sells literally everything I packed on ebay, Facebook, and Craigslist before I could get back. He even tried to sell my dog and 3 cats but my friends stopped him. I managed to salvage 10 boxes of family heirlooms and my pets. Everything else was gone, to pay for his new life.

He sued me for alimony and the house and my retirement. I had no money for a lawyer, so I answered my divorce pro se. I got tipped off on the baby and that ended the alimony/retirement piece of my divorce. He did get the house. I got my freedom, but I was nearly homeless by the end. No money and 4 months in my job laid me off and eventually closed. I was a mess.

Decided to go back to school with loans. Managed to get by for 2.5 years until I graduated, summa cum laude. Got picked up by a lot of companies but ended up following my heart and moved across country with my new BF to a house by the beach where I joke that I have become a trophy girlfriend at 46. I'm currently looking at going back to school to finish my PhD and cross off another bucket list item. Life is more than good, it's plush. I've managed to be a breadwinner for 18 years and now I don't need to work, so I volunteer and do gig work on occasion. I started to paint to keep myself busy. Far better than working for corporate America, which I did for most of my life.

My ex? He married his baby momma and had a son less than 2 months after my divorce was final. He exclaimed that he finally met "the love of his life" on Facebook. I wondered why he stayed with me for 18 years if I wasn't. Lol

She left him less than a year later with his son. He's now a single dad at 50. No real career. Alone. Living paycheck to paycheck. She's already remarried.

And that's what happens when you just move on and live your best self instead of worrying about the baggage you left behind.

2.) From Ad-Alert:

One of my best friends since middle school was a super high achiever growing up, and her mom hated me. My family is much lower-class than hers, and while my friend was being offered whatever she needed in terms of push to succeed, I was being left home alone while my parents both worked and partied from a young age.

At one point when I was 12, my friend's mom told me to my face that she didn't like me, thought I was disrespectful, I was going nowhere in life, and that I was going to be a bad influence on her daughter.

Friend and I still stayed close through high school and wound up going to the same university. We both had our struggles in the first couple years - I had an abusive relationship, she got into drugs. Both of us took a hit in terms of grades from that stuff.

I pulled out of my slump, finished my degree, and started working. Friend took an academic break. I saved up some money and went back to grad school. Friend returned to working on her BA while living in a trailer her uncle owns from the 80s. I got a job in my new field post-grad school. Friend quit school again and started working full-time at a bar, then got a DUI.

Pre-covid, I got invited to Friend's wedding, so I flew back home for the occasion. In addition to getting to support one of my oldest friends in a huge life milestone (she's mostly sober these days, and that's worth celebrating even if I do secretly hate her choice of husband), I got to see the look on her mom's face when she finally recognized who I was, then got to tell her about everything I've done since finishing high school: the master's degree, the six-figure job, the move across the country, my own marriage, and on top of that I got into fitness and I'm a full 5 dress sizes smaller than I was at age 17.

3.) From GardenVarietyUnicorn:

I have a disability that is aggravated by repetitive motions like typing. I asked my work to accommodate my disability, but they did not, and my condition deteriorated until I could no longer work.

Fast forward 8 years: I now receive worker’s compensation, SSDI and have a disability retirement. In addition, I sued them for discrimination- and won. Big time - 8 years back pay with interest too. My boss and HR got punished.

So now, instead of working my 40+ hours for a bunch of discriminating dickwads - I work on me. I lost 30 lbs, took the $ and went on a nice long vacay, and read reddit. Granted, I have to deal with my disability- but I had that even before then, and now worker’s compensation has to pay for my medical bills and prescriptions because they made it worse. Laugh is on them!

4.) From celestialism:

I've been criticized, shamed, dismissed, and shouted down by trolls my entire career because I'm a feminist woman who writes about sexuality on the internet. Getting a book deal felt like a huge "f**k you" to them all.

5.) From ConnieC60:

Probably when I split up with my ex fiancé after he cheated on me with someone at his place of work. I lost a load of weight through stress and treated myself to some new clothes. I got a long overdue haircut. I got a new career, a car, bought a new piano and a house because I no longer had to financially support him. I bumped into him about nine months after we broke up when everything was going well for me. He had no job, looked like crap and had the worst dye job I’ve ever seen - so bad I actually doubled over with laughter. He scuttled off looking miserable and I walked away feeling like I was lucky I was no longer with him.

6.) From Bambamskater:

After my ex dumped me I decided I’m going to do everything I want to do (and can afford).

I lost 20 pounds because I climb mountains, I travel all the time, and anytime a friend wants to meet up for a social event I say yes.

Honest to God, I look at photos of him and he looks miserable and every single time, it just makes me smile.

The best revenge in the world is fulfilling your own dreams and living the life you always wanted to live.

7.) From pittielove2464:

My ex and I broke up a few years ago and I was pretty devastated. Since then, I've bought a condo, got a dog, got promoted, traveled, and am generally living an awesome life. He got a one night stand (that he didn't even like) pregnant and now lives with her and their son and is unemployed. I think I won.

8.) From lexi7171:

Found out my (ex)boyfriend of five years was cheating on me for months and got the girl pregnant. Needless to say, I left.

I stayed working my dream job in ICU at one of the top hospitals in the area, lived with my parents and so I was able to pay off all my undergrad loans and save a ton of money. I ended up traveling all around the world without him guilting me for “leaving him”. I made new friends because before it used to be just me and him and no one else. I started horse back riding and doing yoga, things he used to say were a waste of time and laugh at me for showing interest in. I lost a bunch of weight, got some new piercings that I LOVE. I also went back for my masters degree.

He on the other hand. He’d always said he couldn’t find a job that he was passionate about so he’d stayed on his mom’s couch for well over a year searching for him dream job. But when the baby was en route, he had to suck it up and got a job working at a local hardware store (I don’t think there’s any problem with working retail, but I know he looked down on it so it makes me giggle thinking of him working in a smock) His mom let him stay until the baby was born and then kicked him out and made him live with the girl and baby. He used to pride himself on his athletic ability. But he definitely let himself go and gained a LOT of weight. He had such a close relationship with his family (as did I) but once they found out what he did, his relationship with his mother and younger brother definitely changed. But the best part was that I went to see his mom a couple months after the baby was born and we talked for a while. She told me she wants all the best for me, and that she wished I could have been her daughter(in law), but she understood why I couldn’t stay. Then, she told me how before he moved out, he would just lay on the floor crying some days. Not gonna lie. That made me smile.

9.) From WineAndDogs2020:

From what I can tell via social media, at least one of my former bullies has been unsuccessful with MLMs.

10.) From mmmaggiemay:

When I finally broke up with a very controlling and toxic boyfriend. His last words to me were something along the lines of you will always be stuck as a single mother without the same freedom as me or any chance to be successful. Fast forward 6 years later: he’s contacted me numerous times to hook up even though he’s with another person he shares a baby with, told me how unhappy he is in the relationship and feels stuck. Still works for the company/same position, I had gotten him into and lives with about 4 other family members in a less than desirable area. Myself: I moved 800 miles up north to pursue my educational and career goals he did not support which is also a much more desirable place to live (less pollution, lower cost of living, beautiful scenery, and less people). I am in a committed relationship with an amazing and supportive man i currently have two kids with.

11.) From prettylittledr:

He dumped me for being poor (living within my means) and said I could never afford to live in a luxury apt with him.

He was right about the luxury apt. BUT I ended up getting a gorgeous apt in the same city we were looking at, with zero roommates (he has 3), parking for my new car (he was giving me shit that my previous car was a POS), and a deck! A full. size. deck. It's unheard of for my part of the city (none of the luxury apts he looked at, in his price range, even included a balcony).

If he could see me now driving through town on my way to sunbathe on my deck lol

12.) From CorvidiaPex:

Was cheated on after 5.5 years together. He was a lousy partner but I was young and had zero self-esteem so I figured that was the best I could do. He gaslight me to no end and lied about pretty much everything.

He had been cheating on me for at least a year, so the relationship was already dying anyway. We split up in March and I had met & started dating someone in June. Within months, I moved in with the new guy 1800km away after being the first in my family to graduate from university.

I don’t think my ex ever finished high school (I recall him doing a victory lap but unsure if he actually graduated) and last I heard he was working as a server and trying to break into the acting world. My husband, on the other hand, is intelligent, determined, hilarious, and treats me like a queen. We had/have good jobs (I’m medically retired now), bought a beautiful house, travelled, got engaged, got married, and are living happily ever after. It’s been 12 years and I still can’t believe I found someone so wonderful.

13.) From LadyCordeliaStuart:

Two of my high school classmates said women shouldn't join the military. I just got out of the Marine Corps. They both joined the Chair Force.

(No actual hate toward the Air Force. They have a different mission and are far more focused on academics than physical strength. But both those boys were firmly convinced that no woman ever could be stronger than any single man (exact words from them). I had to do three pull-ups to qualify and I can do seven. The Air Force doesn't require pull-ups at all)

14.) From 2confrontornot:

My ex boyfriend said my art wasn’t good. He said there was no point in me going to university and I would never sell/show my art anywhere.

Well, I’ve won many awards for my artwork. Excelled in university and on my way to becoming an art teacher. And my work is hanging in multiple local galleries. I also do commissions and have sold original work.

F**k him. The jealous loser.

15.) From InkaCrema:

Last year I moved to LA to work for an arts nonprofit that's well known in my industry (in the space of two weeks I quit my job and moved 1,000 miles to a city I'd never been to for this job). It was awful, my boss was such an asshole that all my family was telling me, "We'll help you stay in Cali and look for a job for a while, just don't stay at this job!" He truly was the worst boss I've ever had, and I've worked at call centers. I walked out after five weeks.

I spent five months scouring for work, and the day I was driving home wondering what the f**k I was going to do I get a call from a previous client offering me a three month contract where I rose to be lead animator working on a Jurassic Park project. Except for some rough times when the pandemic hit earlier this year I've been working steadily, and was even hired for a project that, except for provided scenarios and some direction, I got to create completely from start to finish.

I'm keeping my story in my back pocket while my career stabilizes, but I'm also eager to prevent anyone else from being abused by this guy. It's a tough position to be in, but in the meantime I'm doing my best to flourish, partially out of spite.

16.) From Ipsey:

I had a boyfriend who dumped me because he thought I was only using him for his car because I didn't have a license. He never talked about it just ghosted me (on Valentines Day, of all days). He was the roommate of a supervisor at my job so she had to be the one to tell me he wasn't going to call back. Sucked but whatever.

A few years later he messages me because we had seen each other in a different town than we had dated in. I had seen his car and asked what he was doing and he lived out there with his current girlfriend, still working at the same sort of job he had worked at when we were dating. I told him I was glad he'd found someone who made him happy. No hard feelings or anything. He asked me if I was seeing someone.

Well, I was. I was married!. I was on that street at that time because we were updating a property I had been renting out so I could sell it before I moved. Since he'd dumped me I had gotten a better job, learned how to drive, started ballet (and as a result looked amazing), and at that point I was wrapping up my life stateside to move overseas to be with my husband. Just tying up loose ends and all!

His response was "Wow, you seem to be doing well in life." I was. I still am! Life is great.

17.) From CountSnackula111:

I was with a shitty guy for about 5 years. He was taking advantage of me by refusing to work more than part time because the room we rented in a house was really cheap if we split it, so he didn't have to work a lot to afford his share of the rent. The house was a shit hole slum and I was miserable there but he refused to work more than a part time job to make more money so we could get our own place. He just straight up did not want to work more than part time in a retail store because he wanted to spend more time playing video games and working full time was too hard. He was 30.

I got a promotion and a raise at work so I could finally make enough to get out. I told him I was moving out whether or not he was coming and it was up to him to decide. He sort of hemmed and hawed and said I was being unreasonable asking him to work more so that we wouldn't have to live in a bug infested house with no AC, roommates that threw parties and had screaming matches every week to find a place of our own. So I left.

That was 3 years ago. Since then, I graduated college and I now have my own place but my current boyfriend is moving in shortly. We are currently creating a financial plan to move to our dream city and get married within the next year. I have a new car, I've lost 50 pounds, and I have a job where I make twice as much money as I did when I left my ex. I'm on medication now and have been in therapy for anxiety and trauma. I am so, so happy as a person now.

Also, once I dumped my ex and moved out, he had to pay the full price of the bedroom we shared and split the rent for, which means he ended up having to work more ANYWAY.

18.) From miekomorris:

A girl I was best friends with all through high school “dumped” me the summer after our freshman year of college. She made it extremely obvious that she was excluding me from things and turned what I thought would be a fun summer reunited with friends into one of the lowest points of my life. I still don’t know what happened because I don’t think I did anything to prompt her behavior and she never offered an explanation.

Instead of spending those months with her as I originally planned, I spent the summer formulating a plan for my education/career and got much closer to my boyfriend.

10 years later - I’m an attorney, married to that boyfriend, own a home, and generally doing pretty well for myself. She’s an unemployed (former) waitress living with several roommates. I ran into her a few years ago and after five minutes the differences between our lives were pretty apparent.

19.) From rabbitwarriorreturns:

My ex (who was really, spectacularly mean and awful to me) found out I was dating somebody new through internet stalking me. He showed up to my apartment one day, walked inside, and began to ask if the new guy had pretty much everything he was self conscious about not having.

“Is he tall?” “Yep” “Does he have a beard?” “Yep” “Does he have a good job?” “Yep” “Does he treat you better?” “Exponentially”

After all that, he asked me to marry him... I turned that offer down, hard.

Then I told him he had to leave, because I was having people over to rehearse a play I wrote that had recently won a shit ton of awards, so... That was a good day.

2020 has been a winding rollercoaster of chaos, but whether we're ready for it or not, Autumn is coming...

Pumpkin-spiced everything, Instagram stories of people crunching crisp leaves, "sweater weather" and the cinnamon-stick Hot Toddy-fueled energy of "spooky season" and "-BER months" are upon us. While Fall has given Spring and Summer some serious competition in recent years as far as "the most popular season" goes with October brides fully taking over for the default "June Bride," Fall 2020 might come with some extra unexpected hurdles.

The passage of time has felt pretty bizarre since March since some days it feels like we've been living in a slow-moving river of bad news sludge, while other days it's truly hard to believe we've more than halfway through the year.

If you're having a hard time dealing with the fact that it's officially September and back-to-school season, here are the funniest tweets we could find about Fall 2020.

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Emotions running high. The open bar inventory running low.

Weddings can inspire some absolutely bonkers behavior, and it's easy for frisky guest to turn the best day of the couple's lives into one of the worst. In a popular thread on Reddit, people shared their most memorable Wedding Guests Gone Wild story, and we're going to need the movies starring Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson STAT.

1. Open mic night.

The DJ stupidly opened up the microphone to anyone who wanted to make a speech. This was after an open bar. One guest made a speech about all the times the bride and groom were on the rocks from his cheating. An old family friend gave a tearful account of how she had wanted to bride to marry her son instead. And another family friend told stories of the groom as a child killing small animals. It was an amazing wedding. -ohcalamity13

2. Not the best standup set.

My cousin got married about seven or eight years ago. Groom's cousin was in the wedding party as a groomsman. So at the reception, the maid of honor and the best man both make their speeches, and then the groom's cousin gets up from his seat and takes the microphone. He starts giving a speech which nobody had asked him to give, and it's immediately apparent he's pretty drunk. He opens with a masturbation joke right out of the gate, rambles drunkenly for a few minutes, and then closes by kissing my cousin right on the corner of the mouth for about four seconds. And maybe four seconds doesn't seem like a long time to you, but take the time right now to count to four, and imagine that the entire time you are kissing somebody else's new bride on the face in front of 200 of her friends and family who have all already decided that they don't like you. -duh_metrius

3. Instant karma.

My friend went to a wedding where the bride and groom specifically asked people not to take photos during the ceremony. One of the guests brought a camera with a tripod and did it regardless. Apparently she had giant curly hair and there were a ton of candles around. Since her hair was so curly she had used a ton of hairspray and her hair got caught in a candle and went up in flames. One of the other guests put it out but got burned in the process. -chewlupa

4. Michael Scott, is that you?

Wedding reception in the penthouse boardroom of a bank. Lobby of said bank had a koi pond. Someone in the wedding party got wasted, took off his shoes and socks, and went fishing for koi with his bare hands.

I wish I could say it was someone else. -NeverEnufWTF

5. We need this movie ASAP.

The ex-boyfriend forcibly cut in on the bride and groom’s first dance together. After a few awkward and tense moments, some friends dragged him out as he yelled through tears, “I’ll always love you and I’ll be waiting for you when this marriage falls apart!”

Plot twist. Several months into the new marriage, she discovered that her new husband was a scam artist going by a different name, had fake IDs with different aliases, criminal record, been married many times, etc. He disappeared that same day, and, yes, she now has been happily married for 15+ years and has three children with her wedding crasher ex-boyfriend. -TheLegendOfZelph

6. When you've got it, flaunt it.

I attended a wedding where the groom's stepmother wore a miniskirted suit, paired with sky-high heels and a large brimmed hat with a small veil, all in pristine white. That was the same wedding where the officiant forgot he had a wedding that day and the groom had to track him down to a barbecue he was attending, so it started an hour and a half late. -AugustaScarlett

7. When you've got it, flaunt it... three times.

At my cousin's wedding this year, the sister-in-law of the groom wore 3 different outfits. Each dress change got sexier and more and more like a wedding dress. It was all we could speak about all night! -babers1987

8. Congratulations?

Best man used his best man speech to propose to his girlfriend. And no, he did not run by the groom first. -BurgNast

9. A comedy of accidents.

My buddy's wedding lastyear was a sh*tshow, through no fault of anyone in particular.

-The night of the rehearsal dinner, a groomsman was getting out of the shower and put his hand on the sink to steady himself (there was no bar or anything). The entire sink collapsed, shattering and slicing his hand open. I got to call 911, and he wound up with something like 15 stitches.

-Later that same night, a guest was drunk and tripped on the stairs, breaking her ankle. She spent the rest of the weekend in a wheelchair.

-During the reception, the Groom's grandfather began to choke and had to be given the Heimlich Maneuver.

Otherwise a really fun wedding. -Notmiefault

10. Baaaaaaaad behavior.

A wedding I was at was next to a goat farm and the goats bleated through the whole ceremony. “Do you BAAAA take BAAAA?” They weren’t really guests, but it was ridiculous. -gth746x

11. I'm telling Grandma!

Cousin of the bride stole the basket full of checks and cash. -fatmeatboy

12. No seconds, auntie.

My friend couldn't afford to spend much on his wedding. And although the venue was large enough to invite a lot of people, it became clear pretty quickly that the set menu dinner would not be enough for everyone (probably due to poor planning or w/e). I was sitting at a table with a bunch of our coworkers and our boss and we collectively decided to decline our plates, which we did. The guy's aunt apparently saw that and started demanding our plates for herself and her kids, saying if we didn't want them then she should be allowed to have them, and she started a big argument about it with the groom's brother. -ayeiamthefantasyguy

13. Party favors.

[I saw a guest] steal bottles of champagne and flower arrangements.

The couple had bought their own alcohol and was paying a corkage fee to the reception venue. One guest assumed it was free booze and was filling the boot of their car with bottles off all the tables. The brides mother noticed her walking off with the centrepiece off a table and followed to see what the fuck she was doing. Cheeky twat was quickly ejected. -Percypigged

14. Not the cutest meet-cute.

The father of the bride wants to share the story of the bride and groom meeting. He tells about how at the hospital his wife and daughter worked at there was a disgruntled ex-employee. This employee brought in a gun and starting shooting colleagues. He told how his wife was hiding in an office and locked the door so the gun man moved on. Later, a doctor who had been shot in the head and played possum managed to get to her door and she let him in. He gave details about the dead and wounded, injuries and outcomes. While he himself wasn't a witness, he told it with enthusiasm like it was the best thing to happen to him in his life.

Then he off-hand mentions that the groom was hired as temporary security in the weeks after and eventually he asked her out, now they are getting married, the end. -DarrenEdwards

15. A very open marriage.

Not a guest, but the actual groom.... Bride and groom have a fairly open relationship where each has a "boy toy" or "girl toy". Most of their friends know about it but I'm pretty that the grandparents and great aunts and uncles have no idea. So, a few hours into the wedding, everyone's got a few drinks in them and I look over the dance floor and there's the groom, dancing with his side chick, completely sucking face in full view of the entire extended family and guests. I'm pretty sure there would have been a murder if the brides older brother saw what was going on. -dragonzim

16. Saturday night's alright for fighting.

At the wedding Bridesmaid 1 found out that Bridesmaid 2 had slept with her boyfriend (who was also at the wedding). We had to remove bridesmaid 1 from the venue as there was a high chance murder was going to be committed. The same wedding the father of the bride was so drunk he threw up in the middle of the dance floor. -EmotionalPiglet

17. DJ, play "Dancing On My Own" by Robyn.

Groom was clearly not at all liked by 99% of the guests (and apparently the bride). He spent most of the night trying to dance with everyone but his new wife and was ignored by pretty much everyone. No one wanted anything to do with him and was super awkward. -isthatnormalpooing

When you take a random assortment of your friends and family and add copious amounts of alcohol, male strippers, phallic straws, and societal pressure to have "the best night ever," what could possibly go wrong? Oh, only everything.

Someone asked women of Reddit: "what was the worst bachelorette party you've ever been to and why?" These 18 women share their stories of bachelorette parties that went very, very badly:

1.) From tinypandamaker:

It was my former friend, started off the day with brunch, which was great. Then she wanted to gamble and expected everyone to give her money when we got to the casino. I think we ended up giving her like $150 to gamble with. She blew that in like half an hour. She then wanted us to cough up more money. Hard pass from me, balling on a budget.

We went for an early dinner and she got rip roaring drunk off margaritas. Like she was two steps away from being the drunk girl crying in a corner drunk. She then wanted to go it a strip club, her maid of honor bought her a lap dance and apparently paid for a little something extra cause they went in a back room. Then she wants taco bell, proceeds to smash five soft tacos and then vomits it all back up in the back seat of my car.

No, she didn't pay for it to get cleaned. That marriage lasted all of six months before she cheated and he found out.

2.) From carolinemathildes:

I've only been to one, and I found it IMMENSELY frustrating that the maid of honour thought that a group of 9 could walk into a Mexican restaurant, on Cinco de Mayo, on a Saturday, in a city with a population of 6 million, and not need a f**king reservation.

3.) From UrbanChicken21:

A college friend got married the summer after we graduated. Her husband had his bachelor party the weekend before in the same city, and he was honest about what they did that weekend - including going to a strip club. So for the bachelorette things are going normal, we're having fun at a nice restaurant but after a few drinks the bride decides we need to go to the same stripclub "to just see what it is like." So we go. The bride started crying once she saw the naked women dancing. The maid of honor (whose boyfriend was also at the bachelor party) starts crying. The sister of the bride starts crying. So there we are, about a dozen women at a strip club, a quarter of the group crying. What a way to celebrate getting married.

4.) From eatscakesandleaves:

Mine.

I was pregnant so we planned a chill dinner at my favourite restaurant.

Then: swine flu. My guests dropped like flies and ended up chill dinner for four. All good friends, all good.

So there's me and Guest One sitting there. Guest One gives me a tiara to wear. Fine.

Now there's me with a tiara and Guest One sitting there. Guest Two arrives. Guest Two got married four months before this party but arrives not wearing her wedding ring. Guest Two has moved in with her parents and initiated divorce proceedings on the grounds that her husband managed to hide a hardcore drug addiction and a lot of debt until they were married. Guest Two cries. A lot.

Guest One and I are reeling and comforting when Guest Three arrives. Guest Three is a doctor, and has no tact. As we're ordering food she asks me about my vaginal secretions and the thickness of my cervix. The waiter drops his pen and someone else serves us for the rest of the night.

The food arrives. It is good. Guest Three takes the opportunity to inform me very casually that someone I was very close to before I emigrated has died, young, tragically and heroically. She goes into some fairly graphic detail.

I'm bolting my food because f**k everything about this but I'm still pregnant and hungry. Suddenly Surprise Guest Four appears. She lives 400 miles away and wasn't coming. I think this is a lovely surprise but she sits down and begins sobbing. She's home because her dad's currently having emergency heart surgery and she can't just sit in his empty house and wait for the phone.

Home by 10pm. F**k this party.

5.) From CrushedLaCroixCan:

It was at a shopping mall at 11 a.m. You know how people do little dares as part of their bachelorette party? Like, "take a picture with the hottest guy around," etc etc.? She did that. At the mall. It was cringey.

6.) From UnnamedNamesake:

Woman cheated on her husband-to-be with a male stripper. Warmed my heart that I wasn't the one that had to give her the ultimatum of telling her fiance or them telling him for her.

7.) From Devilis6:

I hosted the group at my house between activities to get food and do a little pre gaming before the bars. The bride, for the many years that I have known her, has never been able to keep shots down, even fruity ones which have low alcohol content. Naturally, she decides we should all do several rounds of fireball together. After each shot, she vomits. Instead of running to the bathroom, she yells “FRONT OR BACK YARD” at me as she runs out of the house... passing my bathroom on the way. I begged her to just throw up in my bathroom instead, but she heard none of it. I think she threw up in my yard three or four different times. I was pretty salty about it.

When we got to the bar she was incoherent and still vomiting so I asked the bartenders to serve her virgin drinks for the rest of the night without telling her. It worked.

8.) From not_doing_that:

This woman and I are no longer friends, and her bachelorette party is part of the reason.

I had a friend from elementary school I still kept in contact with. I met her for dinner and we were talking about her engagement, I was asking questions about her wedding, being polite. I asked who her bridesmaids were, and she felt awkward for not asking me, so on the drive home she called and asked me to be a bridesmaid, spur of the moment. I said yes as I was caught off guard, then backed out when I realized how much $$ and time it was going to cost, and my work schedule was really bad at the time. Plus SO and I were trying to get pregnant (I would later find out I'm infertile, and I didn't want to be pregnant and doing all the shit she expected her bridesmaids to do).

Well she took exception to this, but still wanted me to be involved. Whatever, it's her day.

Something everyone in my life knows about me: I'm a vegan. Have been for years. I don't expect everyone to cater to me, but by god, she could not have planned a more anti-vegan party if she tried. All the drinks had milk or gelatin in them. The place she chose for dinner was a steakhouse where you pick out your own steak and the only vegan thing there was a side salad, minus cheese, with oil and vinegar.

After sitting around for an hour waiting on her to finish getting ready, then 2.5 hours at the restaurant (no reservation, had to wait for a table), then the saddest salad I have ever choked down in my life, and listening to "so and so is a vegetarian, but she's having sides" (she also ate bacon so....not a vegetarian) Also everyone kept comparing the 'good vegetarian' to the 'bad vegan' because she gave in and ate bacon, and I wouldn't, the bride reveals that now everyone has to chip in $280 to pay for the party bus she insisted on renting, to drive around wearing dicks and go to bars. Not my scene, I was starving (it was like hours into the 'party' at this point) so I bailed. And she was pissed I bailed.

9.) From graciecakes89:

Bride started out by thrusting her dry cleaning into my face. We got ready to go out in the hotel room. It was myself, the MOH, and the bride. She gave us a list of approved topics for the evening (sports were not on the list. The MOH works for a MLB team). We then walked around the city, had dinner, went back to the hotel room for HGTV and drinks. The next day the three of us went to brunch, got our nails done, took a nap. Then three of the groom's childhood friends (all ladies) joined us for dinner, clubbing and a burlesque show. The burlesque show was actually amazing. The rest of the group got trashed at the club then proceed to puke up pink drink and beans from dinner all over the hotel room. I was the only one not trashed. The next morning the bride threw a fit over having to go to brunch with her mother and MIL, knocked over 8 wine glasses and passed out in the booth next to us. Never got paid back for any of it from anyone.

The other bachelorette party everyone cried because a) their boyfriend was cheating on them b) this was their first time away from their boyfriend and they were afraid of his cheating c) everyone else was crying so why not her too.

10.) From bettercallsaul3:

Technically didn’t go to a bachelorette party but the bride had hers on the same night as the groom’s bachelor party so we all met up after. It turns out the one of the bridesmaids couldn’t afford some of the dinner items (sushi rolls) at a nice restaurant so she cried and left the bachelorette party to go to her brother’s bachelor party. The bachelor party had to stop everything to pick her up at the hotel so she could come with us to the strip club. After the club we met the bachelorette party at the Airbnb and all hell broke loose. One of the bridesmaids found out her husband got a lap dance and threw a full bottle at him then proceeded to go ape on him and punch him in the head. She screamed that she could find a man who made more money than him. She said his life was over and she was taking away his kids. Then the groom’s sister and bride’s cousin start fighting over nothing which then escalated into a full fist fight between them. One of the groomsmen stepped between them to stop the fight but got knocked back and hit his head on the porch column outside. His head bursts open and blood gushes out like the elevator scene from The Shining. Then the bride’s cousin punched the groom’s sister and gave her a black eye. The paramedics were called in but the injured groomsman refused to have his head gash cleaned or stitched so now he’s walking around like the Massive Head-wound Harry from SNL (even had an open head-wound for the wedding). The worst part was the bride was asleep for all of this because she pre-gamed so she woke up to people yelling and a crime scene full of blood. She called that night the worst disaster of her life. Luckily, no one fought at the wedding though.

11.) From yungleg:

My own. Both of my own, actually. The first one I had the flu and we couldn’t reschedule our hotel reservations. Two of my bridesmaids were pissed beyond belief that I couldn’t drive them to the hotel (again, had the fucking flu) and then abandoned me there. My husband had to drive 2 hours to come get me.

Second one, my maid of honor threw me a “do-over” party for just the two of us. It ended up being me following her around all night while she ignored me and threw herself at every guy in the bar, and then ended with ME having to take care of HER because she got too wasted. I barely had 3 drinks.

I have better friends now.

12.) From violetwhoregarde:

Went down to Las Vegas with my sister-in-law and her friends for her bachelorette party. They had all been close since elementary school, and the friends were real life mean girls. I had never and to this day have still not met a worse group of women. Had absolutely no interest in getting to know me and did everything possible to make sure I did not feel included in everything we did. It went from not acknowledging me when I tried to make conversation to not informing me of the plans / reservations they had made. It was the worst 3 days ever and to this day I have no idea why she invited me to come on the trip.

At the wedding a month later and again a couple years later at SIL's baby shower they pretended I did not exist. Just unreal.

13.) From the-thieving-magpie:

I was invited to the bachelorette party of a college classmate. We weren't that close, but she also didn't have many friends so I went to be nice.

It turned out to be a Mary Kay "party" and we spent the night sitting around the dining room table in front of tiny plastic mirrors, being instructed on how to apply sample products to our faces and being pitched a sale. I at least had wine.

14.) From LasagnaTosser:

The one where the bride bailed out in the middle of the party, called her fiance to drive 2 hours to pick her up and take her home, and left us bridesmaids to sleep in the hotel without her and wonder wtf had just happened.

15.) From ComfortableBicycle:

My friend lined up a Czech male stripper for my bachelorette party. He barely spoke English, came down the stairs of my house dressed as a cowboy, got fully nude (awkward), and only danced to Bon Jovi songs. I was laughing so hard, I was crying. But he remained super serious the whole time and kept trying to get us to touch his little weewee. To top it off, the bachelorette party included members of my fiancé’s family who I had not met before this occasion, including my conservative sister in law and strict Mormon aunt. It was so bad.

16.) From ravenaithne:

Probably my own. The plan was to meet up for dinner at this fancy little place with good drinks then bar hop downtown from there.

After dinner, all but my MOH and a bridesmaid bailed for other plans. The three of us ended up going to two more bars but it was a pathetic little affair, through no fault of my two friends. They tried so hard and I felt bad for them.

I ended up redecorating the bathroom with the contents of my intestines, and went home. Just an embarrassing, cringe-inducing night.

17.) From iocanepowderimmunity:

I have a friend who went to a bachelorette party where the bride had decided that everyone would run a marathon with her. And not in a ‘do your best’ kind of way. They were all expected to run together and finish holding hands.

18.) From dnelli:

It started on the west side of town and we were taking a limo downtown (so about 15 miles) to have dinner and do some club hopping. It was cool. We were all having fun, and there was a party bus.

Then we get driven to a hotel on the north side of town, in a really sketchy neighborhood. The hotel had a club, we could see (from the hotel window) a lot of people in red going in and out of the club. So it made me nervous that we would possibly be going out through a gang area. Well, the hotel was sketchy. And then a stripper shows up. The guy is about 45-50, short. And it was super awkward. So then once that was over, we were all left on our own to get back to our cars. A $60 cab ride home.

It ended sketchy AF and I was pissed we didn't have a ride home, about 25 miles away. This was before Uber/Lyft. I'll always ask ahead of time the plan to get home. It was an expensive night.

Even the most vicious of bullies can never compare to the cruelty of our own brains. It's the only organ in the human body that is capable of torturing us as we lie in bed at night by bringing up something we did or said years, or even decades, ago. Like the time I tried to wave to the popular girl from my car in high school but accidentally hit the horn and honked at her instead. I still think about that 20 years later when I can't fall asleep at night. Thanks a lot, brain!!!

Someone asked people on Reddit to share their "relatively minor social missteps or poorly chosen words" that still make them cringe and keep them awake at night, even years later.

These 21 people share the painfully awkward and embarrassing moments they may never forget:

1.) From Kaylycat:

Not really something I said but when I was in second grade I wasn't feeling well. The teacher was talking & i was taught to wait until someone is done speaking to talk, so i waited and finally I had a chance. I walked up to her desk to ask if I could go to the bathroom & threw up all over her desk.

The next day at school she told everyone if we felt sick to just go to the bathroom, don't ask just go.

It's stuck with me ever since lmao

2.) From Pandacat1551:

Accidentally pat my legs and told my friend to come to me. I hadn't seen them in a while and was only playing with my dog before they came over. Still think about it a lot even though it was at least 2 or 3 years ago.

3.) From RevolutionaryHair91:

When I was 7 or 8 I went to school a Saturday morning despite feeling sick. My father had given me a medicine for headaches. At some point I felt bad in class and had to puke. But it came so suddenly, before I knew I needed to it was too late. So I grabbed the first thing next to me to puke into. It was the inside of the sleeve of the jacket of my table neighbor. Nobody noticed and I did not say a word. Left as soon as the bell rang before he put his jacket on.

4.) From JackyBurnsides:

Accidentally ran wheelchair bound friend into wall. Still cringe about it 7 years later

5.) From Bannybaws:

I was having a lunch date with an old friend from school and her toddler. I was showing the kid something on my phone and he grabbed it. For some reason I said, in a jokey voice, “You better not drop that or I’ll stab you!” As soon as the words left my mouth I was like, what the actual f**k have I just said? I looked at my friend in absolute panic. She just looked at me like I was an idiot. To this day I have absolutely no idea why I threatened to stab a baby, even if it was just a daft joke. I think about it periodically and cringe so hard. It’s a wonder my friend still talks to me...

6.) From Septopuss7:

I was running late and miraculously found a parking space directly in front of the building. I didn't have change for the meter, so I pled with the guy running a hotdog stand to break a $5 for me. He refused, I got mad and when I rushed back to my car I stepped half off the curb and rolled into the street.

He and several customers started laughing loudly.

I responded, sitting in the street, "YOU THINK THAT'S F**K?"

At that point they were just dying, as was I.

7.) From gotobedjessica:

Yes. I still beat myself up over saying “can I give you a hand” to a pizza delivery guy who was trying to juggle a pizza and open a door.

He only had one arm.

8.) From Thoughtitwouldlast:

It was extremely stupid. I was a kid back then at the airport and I was schedualed to go visit my family. My dad brought me to a restaurant before my flight. While I was there, I saw these chinese chopsticks that looked really cool. But I was sure my dad wouldn't buy me them. So for the first time ive got mischivieous and tried to steal them. As i was doing so, i turn around and see that everyone happened to be staring at me. My dad, the cashier and the cook. Realizing what had happened and me realizing they realized made me cry instantly. I vividly remember my dad telling the cook and cashier that I am usually not like this which made it even worse. Afterwards i found out the chopsticks were free anyway.

9.) From goingrogueatwork:

In fourth grade first week of school I was peeing and a dude went to the urinal next to me and said “hey what’s up [my name]”.

I was like “uh hey.... do I know you?” I thought he was just picking on me because I was an easy target for bullies.

The dude was like “yeah man! I’m so and so! How was your summer?”

It turns out my friend hit a major growth spur over the summer and I didn’t even recognize him. A little bromance moment and I was too dumb to realize it.

10.) From Raiserswt:

I think we've all done this, called the teacher mom.

11.) From fendov2018:

Nightly. Daily. Here are some highlights:

• in 10th grade I had just parted ways with my boyfriend, and not on great terms. I was always kind of weird and awkward, and just kind of stuck my foot in my mouth. His sister was popular. Well one day I dropped my keys in the auditorium and had to go to the office to get them during class. Saw popular sister in the hallway and tried to laugh it off with her (why, me?) and she just stared at me. Then as I’m walking away I hear her friend ask who I was, and she says “the weirdo my brother finally broke up with.” Youch.

• the year after I went to college I went back to a football game to see my friends in band. Thought an old section mate was asking me to hang out after the game. He was talking to the girl behind me in the stands.

• my dad gave me $10 to ride my bike to the store for milk. I was nine or so, and I’d done it many times. I grabbed the milk, and at the last second I decided to get myself a candy bar. I panicked because it wasn’t my money and ate the candy bar before going home. Dad asks where the rest of the change is, I lie and say I don’t know. Dad says he’s going back to the store with me to find out. I spill the truth, and he says he would have been fine with the candy, but he wasn’t fine with the lie. I never forgot that shame.

12.) From BirdAsleep:

When I was around 11 years old I was at a friends house and their neighbors dog ran away. I followed the dog to a rocky shore and I was calmly trying to grab it's collar to bring it back home. Then in a split second the owner finds us and startles me and I accidentally step on the dog's paw and it screamed. The owner thought I had taken the dog out to the shore and that I hurt it on purpose. That shit still makes my heart hurt.

13.) From smershlee:

When I was in middle school I had a crush on my best friends brother. He said something like putting crushed up potato chips on his hot dog was good. Everyone else disagreed but I said 'oh I've had that and it's delightful!' But everyone also knew that I hate hot dogs and don't really love chips so my BFF kind of just stared at me. It's more a minor thing but even 18 years later I still think about how much of a silly girl thing it was to agree with him just so he would think I might be cool.

14.) From christygl7:

....sigh.....

My first boyfriend. 6th grade. I was not pretty yet. A little chunky blonde girl who had not found herself and just wanted to be accepted. I had very little friends, 2 best friends (my only friends) and a group I hung out with awkwardly. A boy with blue eyes asked to go out with me, I was ecstatic. Said yes and would sometimes walk me home after school, wasn't too far, but would never hold my hand which I thought was weird but told myself who cares this boy actually wants to be with me. Well 2 weeks later breaks up with me during class in a note, so I got up, threw it in the trash thinking I was doing some type of harm to him? While walking back to my desk they were saying things like "you earned your money" and "bet you won't do it again" so knowing it was a dare I went to their desks and said "thanks athholes". Yes you read that right. I don't have a lisp. I replaced those very important s's with a th. Walking away they all laughed and I had never felt more humiliated. Luckily I know how immature we all were and doesn't affect me today but dang it's still makes me cringe thinking about it.

15.) From lachavela:

I cringe every time I remember this. And I can’t even say I was young and stupid. Well I guess I can say yes, I was stupid.

My husband and I stopped at his brothers house late one night after coming home from the state fair. When we walked into the house, we saw that it was a mess. Like clothes were all over the couch, there was food and plates on the table, it was kind of dirty. My sister-in-law said “ you should of stopped by earlier in the day”. I said “ why? Was your house cleaner then?” She said no “we built a porch out back”. Hence the reason the house was a mess.

I’m not a good person :(

16.) From StefeSoo:

Was at my cousins wedding, and my very christian uncle happened to be sitting in my assigned seat, and I’d moved a few seats away. Desserts got passed out and, in my drunken state, thought I was funny by snatching the dessert that was put in front of him, claiming it was mine. Knocked over an almost full beer while I reached for it. He just said “ahhhh I’m going over here now”, and left the table.

That pops into my head every now and then, and I cringe every time.

17.) From yelena_the_me:

Once I was on a school trip with a few girls I didn't know very well. Two were talking aside, then one came over and ask us if we think she's fat. Being an idiot without a filter, I said sth along the lines of "not that much" (she was a little chubby). She started crying and noone wanted to talk to me anymore. Served me right, I still regret running my mouth like that

18.) From C*ckDaddyKaren:

I remember having a huuuuuuuuge crush on some guy in high school. I was really annoying though and he did NOT want to talk to me. He'd kinda tolerate me, bare minimum. I'd loudly tell jokes and draw dumb shit on the whiteboard (cause I was the dumbass class clown type in high school.) I was CERTAIN that the best way to a guy's heart was acting like a massively obnoxious fool. I would sometimes make excuses to be in the same room (ie showing up to one of his classes with a note for the teacher or whatever.) It was terrible. Even as I was doing it I could feel the tremendous amount of creeping cringe. A few years later I was lying in bed at night and realized, holy shit, I think Gary was gay. Sometimes even now I wake up in paralysing fear of the person I was at 16. It's gotten even worse now that I've realized I'm also gay so I really don't know what the f**k was going on there

19.) From LifeRips2020:

One time I was out shopping and as I was going down an aisle, I saw an older lady struggle to lift something off of a shelf. As I was getting closer I was slowing down trying to decide if it was appropriate to offer some help. I instead didn’t say anything, as she ended up lifting it up before I could, and she noticed me staring at her. I felt terrible about it all day and wondered why I didn’t just offer some help immediately.

20.) From high_friendship:

One of my worst f**kups. My mom had some elderly friends over (they were around 80, I think), who were staying in the guest bedroom. They're super nice, so I decided I would help them bring their stuff upstairs.

As the woman was halfway up the stairs, struggling with an armful of clothes, I offered to take them from her. As she was passing me the clothes, she lost her balance and fell down the f**king stairs backwards.

She was fine, she's a very tough chick, but at first it was like I was watching her fall in slow motion. I apologized a million times, and she was cool about it, but I still regret trying to help...

21.) From ProudLiberal54:

I was a young, punk,self-centered kid, we played football in the neighborhood. We had another child with braces on his legs but he played with us. I started running my stupid mouth about not wanting him on my team: he was standing behind me. He never said a word. I don't remember but I don't think I played that day. That was 50+ years ago and I still hate myself for it.

When you're connected with a good family babysitting can be an amazing gig. In the ideal scenario, babysitters and nannies are able to form lasting bonds with kids, come to mutually respectable agreements with parents, make reasonable money, and even munch on delicious snacks from time to time.

Unfortunately, for every handful of amazing families, there is a nightmare babysitting situation. Some kids act out because they're routinely neglected, they've never been disciplines, or the family fosters a lack of care for others. There are a multitude of reasons why some kids cross the line from expected child shenanigans to downright scary behavior, but the end results are the same: the babysitter is at a loss for what to do.

In a popular Reddit thread, babysitters shared their "demon child" stories, and it serves as a reminder that children need loving guidance - not free reign to do whatever they feel like.

1. From CMelody:

I babysat all through junior high and high school to make my spending money. The worst was a referral for the friends of a family I babysat for all the time. There were two twin boys who were 8, and a little girl who was just starting her toilet training.

The kids were very nice during the introductions. But it soon turned out they were hyper as hell as soon as their parents left. The boys whooped and hollered and chased each other through the house. I convinced them to play Legos or whatever in their room to quiet them down because I had to deal with the little girl who needed to potty. She kept trying to poop in her little training potty but it wasn't happening. Then I heard the boys screaming at the top of their lungs, so I left the girl on her potty to find out why the boys were freaking out.

The boys' bedroom had two single beds. Each boy was standing on his bed PISSING at the other one like they were having a pee pee duel. They got urine everywhere, on the walls, the carpet, the sheets and all over each other.

I'm ticked at these kids and tell them to change their clothes and strip the sheets. They just keep laughing at me and make me chase them around the house like it is a funny game to be soaked in pee.

Meanwhile, the little girl (who is not wearing any pants or undies) drags her potty into the kitchen singing at the top of her lungs about how she pooped and wants me to look. When one of the boys runs through the kitchen, he accidentally overturns the potty and stuff gets all over the lineoleum.

As much as I wanted to cry from utter frustration I managed to hold my temper and calm them all down enough while I cleaned up as best I could...tough when it isn't your house and I had no idea where they kept all their cleaning supplies.

When the parents finally came home they didn't offer any apologies for how their kids behaved or any extra tip or anything like that. Needless to say, that was the first and last time I ever babysat for that family!

ETA: This was way back before everyone had cell phones, so calling the parents to come home immediately wasn't really a good option...it would have involved calling a movie theater (or whatever) to track them down when I didn't even know what film they were seeing or even know if they had finished eating dinner out yet. Unless the kids were dying I would not call the parents. I am rather proud of my 14-year-old self for being a trooper and sticking it out rather than giving up. Plus it is just pee and poop. I'd changed diapers and cleaned up after pets before.

2. From Adkgirl85:

I had one main family I regularly babysat for after college and they recommended me to a friend of theirs who had two girls. Both families were well off, but very different.

Anyway, the second family's two girls were beyond spoiled. I mean, TV reality show spoiled. The youngest, who was five, would blood curdle scream for a good 15 minutes running through this mansion house when it was time for bed. I always felt like an a*shole calling the mother but they didn't pay me enough to put up with that bullshit. I'd have to set the girl up in the "special room" and rub her back while she fell asleep after she spoke to her mother.

I sat for them three times and avoided their calls after that.

3. From CertifiedCinephile:

A kid threw an easy bake oven at me and then tried to lock me in a closet.

4. From Dearestbrittany:

I am a full-time nanny, and have been for the past 5 years, but in childcare for the past 12. I am primarily a nanny of multiples ranging from twins to quadruplets.. Now, with that being said, you'd think I had run across a handful of demon children, which I have, but dear lord, it's the parents that are the demons on more than one occasion.

The one in particular that comes to mind:

I started with a morning family that I found through Care.com after my regular family shortened my hours to afternoons only. When I first interviewed, the mom was notably odd, very in touch with emotions, and very particular about food. She stated that she wanted me from 7:00-12, Monday through Friday for her 5-year-old son and her 3-year-old son while she either ran errands, or worked from the home. Not too weird so far, but then she asked me what my parenting style was. I told her that my style was whatever hers was. I am perfectly fine altering my nannying style to fit each individual families needs. She told me she was wanting the answer of what I was going to do when I was a parent, not in nannying. I told her my philosophy (be kind, be consistent, time outs for bad behaviour, etc).

She then told me hers: -we don't tell our children 'no' -we don't take their toys away -we don't do time outs -we don't spank (okay, I agree).

So, to say the least, I was confused about how the hell they run their household. Pretty much, she believed that each child had this "emotional backpack" where they store their feelings, and they need to express them constantly. She also mentioned to me that both of her children sleep in her bed. All well and good, but here's how her children acted with it once I was hired:

-I asked the 3-year-old (still in diapers) to lay down so I could change him. He refused, so I gave him a warning that I was going to pick him up and lay him down to change him. He then ran off to his mother screaming and crying. I told her why he was crying and this is what she said, "did Brittany do something to upset you? You just go ahead and cry, I'll hold you." Then once he was done with his tantrum, she said "I'm so proud of you for getting all those big feelings out." No. Your child threw a tantrum because he didn't want his butt changed. He doesn't need praise for that.

-The five-year-old was very independent, very smart, and very OCD. At one point, his brother and I were colouring. Now, as normal three-year-olds do, he was scribbling. His brother came in and started taunting his brother and telling him he was doing everything wrong. I told the older brother, "your brother is trying to express his creativity. Let's encourage him, rather than criticise him" The 5-year-old bursts into tears and runs to his mother, and he has the biggest wail about this, to which the mother responds the same as above.

-The five-year-old was mad at his mother because she told him to get dressed. He came up, hit her across the face while screaming. She just let him. She kept praising him for getting his "big feelings" out. He's still hitting her, so he takes him to the shower, turns the water on both of them (fully clothed) and tries to get him to calm down.

So, besides those incidents, I can't get either child to do anything, especially with the mother around. After a few weeks, she introduced me to more rules, and more expectations. She wanted me to have a schedule with them, and wanted me to do some homeschooling. No big deal, got it.. But then, anytime I told them it was time for blah blah blah, she'd swoop in and say that they could just play instead. Like, the children just woke up that morning and I told them to brush their teeth.

They said they wanted to play, and the mom negotiated with them by asking them if that's what they thought they 'felt' they needed to do. Like, no matter what I or the mother said it was time to do, as long as the kid 'felt' like he didn't need to do said thing, then he didn't need to do so. At one point, even, the mom and I took the kids to the library. I told her we needed to finish up soon because I needed to get going to my other job soon. We got to the car, and because the five-year-old didn't 'feel' like getting in the car, she let him stand outside for 25 minutes before he 'felt' like getting in the car, resulting in me being late for my next job.

She also was really strange with food, too. She was one of those people who legitimately treated organic food as a religion (her words). She had a number system for food 1-5. The only things that were listed as #1 (as in completely healthy) was a vitamin called Chywanprash. Even fruits and vegetables were labeled as a #2. Salads and healthy food? #3. Bread? #4. And anything sweet #5. The thing is, she classified anything above a #2 to be unhealthy, so these children thought a simple salad, or anything normal, was bad for them, so they wouldn't eat it.. And anytime they did have any sweets, they'd go fucking nuts over wanting more because she deprived them of everything. They'd have full day tantrums because of it.

The last note is that she didn't allow any electronics in the bedroom. Not even an alarm clock. So this meant that I had to wait every single day in the cold, ringing the doorbell constantly (sometimes up to 45 minutes) for them to come answer the door.

Needless to say, I quit within two months. It was utterly ridiculous. At the end of it, she asked me to review her family and children. She asked me the pros and cons. She was very shocked to hear that the only pro I listed was that their children had a very good vocabulary.

Tl;dr: Despite nannying for many years, it's the parents that are always more demonic than the children.

5. From KA260:

I babysat for a few families on my street as a preteen/teen. Word of mouth spread and a family maybe 6 streets away asked me to watch 3 kids. 3 kids seemed like a lot for not knowing them, but they said they'd only be gone a few hours.

Parents leave. Kids turn into demon spawn. 2 little boys and 1 youngest child girl. They tormented her until she was literally hiding/clinging to my legs and clothes. I turned on a movie and they were okay for a minute.

Then 1 boy gets up and pulls his pants down and literally just starts pissing in the middle of the living room (he's totally potty trained... like 6). I freak out and start to clean it up and send the boy to his room. The other brother followed him, as they shared a room, and just sat there with him. The girl sneaks downstairs throughout all this and unbeknownst to me starts making an F5 grade mess.

After I clean the pee, I go to get them out of the boys' room. Surprise, door is closed. Oh, and apparently locked.... the one boy is only like 3 and is crying because he can't open it and his brother won't let him out. The older boy is defiant and just screaming at me NO IM NOT OPENING IT. YOU'RE NOT MY MOM! I WANT MY MOMMY! We had a standoff for a few minutes before I realized the girl was gone.

Well, I wasn't getting the boys out, so I went to get the phone and call the parents while I tried to find the girl. She pulled out ALL the fucking toys and they were everywhere and I couldn't find her because she was like in a pillow pile somewhere.

I don't really have an ending to the story, but needless to say I was pretty much in tears by the time they came home. One of them drove me home and kept apologizing and hoped I'd still give them another chance. That did not happen.

Edit: haha this almost does sound like the other story. Maybe that's why I'm scared to have little boys. Also, this was probably 15+ years ago. I was maybe 14? I didn't have the mental capacity to know what to do or how to handle any of this. And yeah, I was paid probably 5-7$ an hour. It was awful and scarred me from babysitting for a while.

6. From sojadedblond:

When I was in high school I had just started getting into babysitting and even then, because I was pretty busy most weeks, it wasn't much. Anyway, there was one family that would ask me to babysit their two boys every couple of weeks or so. Not for long, usually a couple of hours. They were both great kids, ages 4 and 6. I always got along great with the parents, so I had no reason to expect what happened the last time I ever babysat for them.

I arrived at their place at 4:30 p.m. on a Saturday and everything was normal. Right before they were about to walk out the door, the mom says, "Oh! Oh my gosh, how awful of me! I forgot to tell you that the people we're going out with need a sitter for their kids and we told them to just bring them over! We'll pay you more, of course!"

I asked how many kids they were bringing and she told me four. Four kids aged between 14 months and 8 years old. It was only supposed to be 2-3 hours and the mom swore up and down that these were very quiet, sweet kids and it wouldn't seem as though I was watching six kids in total. I agreed, as she seemed genuinely distraught that she'd forgotten to tell me all of this. And, as I said before, I had no reason not to trust her.

So the other family brings their kids over and drops them off. ALL SIX OF THEM. So, I now have 8 kids to watch and right off the bat, one kid sets out to make my life hell.

Very, very long story short: The adults were gone until 1 a.m. They paid me $34 for the entire night. They didn't answer my calls when I called about one of the kids who ate a banana who then told me that he was severely allergic to bananas. (He wasn't. He was fine.) But I panicked trying to get ahold of his parents for quite some time. All of the kids went along with it until the sweetest child there, a little girl who was about 6, told me that her brother was lying.

The adults told me they were going to one local restaurant, Marketplace Grill, but they didn't. Because I called it looking for them and there was only one location in our city at that time. They confirmed when they got home that they'd actually gone somewhere else. I'd called both couples cells probably 3x each, neither answered or called back or replied to my messages. I genuinely thought the kid might have a horrible allergic reaction and was preparing to have to call 911.

The oldest kid wrangled all the other kids to be horrible all night. To each other. To me. To the poor kitty named Mr. McFluffs. He had one child poop on the living room rug while I was distracted by another child screaming and hitting his twin brother. Another kid vomited and the oldest (demon child) kid scooped it up and threw it on the walls. When I finally sat the oldest kid down and told him he was in time out for the vomit incident, he picked up a ceramic figurine from the coffee table and tried to throw it at my head (I grabbed his arm halfway through his throwing motion and saved the stupid figurine).

Then he broke down, sobbing, and said his dad hit him at night when his mom went to bed and be showed me bruises on his ribs. I immediately got very, very concerned and he then broke out in hysterical laughter saying, "I just wanted to see the look on your stupid face!".

Nightmare. Night.

I wasn't really upset with the original family I was babysitting for because it certainly wasn't their fault that the other family's kids were hellions. But when she told me she purposefully didn't answer my calls because she knew I was calling about how bad things were and then gave me $34? Yeah. Nope. Nooope. Never again.

The other family didn't pay me a single dime.

It was a nightmare night.

7. From Strip_Mall_Ninja:

I had a kid go to the bathroom, poop, run out with no pants (no wiping), grab my house key, and throw it in the poop.

While I fished it out, he sat on the couch rubbing his butt. I used every kind of soap on that key.

When his parents got back, I waited to get paid. Then I explained things pointing to the spot on the couch and left.

8. From AverageJoe5555:

I had a kid who climbed out his bedroom onto the roof of the house and set the house on fire. The kid was a demon. He was 9 at the time.

I called the fire dept. and got all 3 kids out of the house. Luckily, the fire station was a few blocks away so they were there & put it out before it really got going (smoldering). I was about 16 at the time & was very much in demand as a babysitter. I was also "no nonsense", which I made clear to parents. I was allowed to spank all of the kids if I needed too (this was the 60's), but this particular kid was beyond that. I lived on the block (4 houses down) with my parents and 8 siblings. I continued to sit for them, because they paid me a lot of money (especially after that) and couldn't get anyone else to do it.

They eventually moved to a mansion in a very wealthy neighborhood, because the dad was made V.P. of the company he worked for, and they still drove about 10 miles each way to get me to watch their kids. I'm still in touch with his sister who lives in Atlanta. I always thought he'd end up in prison, but, surprisingly, he's a fireman.

9. From jlfon:

I had a five-year-old pull out a pocketknife on me and demand I give him my Pokemon cards.

Also had a kid try to pry the kitchen window off because he wanted to see the kids I was watching that were inside.

10. From bigbluenobody:

My friend babysat a kid with pica. Had to follow him around everywhere yelling NO DON'T EAT THAT. Kind of like having a new puppy. Ended the night watching him chew on her flip flop while it was on her foot.

11. From PBandJayne:

Not technically a babysitter but for a few months I had to babysit my husband's nieces and nephews. These kids are awful. Their parents neglect them and it shows. Here are a few highlights.

I rescued a two-week old kitten. Nursed him back to health and adopted him. One day while I was doing dishes, the 2 youngest kids took him outside and tried to drown him in the above ground pool. Twice. He survived.

My in-laws house was filthy and roach infested. While one of the kids was eating dinner, a roach apparently crawled across his plate, he started hysterically crying. I go to calm him down and one of the others runs into the kitchen, opens every spice she can get get hand on and dumps them all over the kitchen.

I decide I have to keep the two smaller ones with me at all times due to their antics. I put them on the kitchen counter to 'help' me cook. They actually start behaving and I thought I had found a successful method in handling them. I was wrong. One asks me a question while the other takes out glasses from the cupboard and starts smashing them on the ground. I go to stop her when the other little one starts smashing plates.

The two oldest were sisters and they hated each other. They get into a fight over the TV (could have been over the xbox, I can't quite remember) the older sister starts chasing after the younger sister, she eventually smashes the younger sister's fingers in the bathroom door. While the younger sister is crying, the older sister is laughing maniacally.

That's just a few. There are several other stories that make me so grateful to have moved far away from them all.

12. From Sweedish_Fid:

Babysat two brothers. The younger proceeded to get into an argument with the older. It quickly escalated into the younger grabbing a kitchen knife and threatening the older brother with it.

13. From Cereyn:

I once watched two brothers while their parents went to the movies. The boys were around 5 and 6 and normally acted pretty nice, but shortly after their parents left things got really weird. They asked me to come up to their playroom then closed the door. They both started to play with some toys, but periodically they would turn around and start touching me inappropriately. I kept telling them to stop and that it was inappropriate, but they just laughed and would continue.

I finally ran downstairs and ignored them while they jumped on furniture and threw sh*t at me. Their parents finally came home and gave me 100 bucks for a three-hour ordeal. They must know that their kids are evil little sh*ts. I found out later that they killed their pet hamsters by throwing them into their ceiling fan at high speed. F*ck those kids.

14. From jfsindel:

I didn't really babysit much but the time I babysat my cousins.

One was a wee little one so she slept in her crib. The nine-year-old however wanted to eat ice cream his mother had put in the freezer but I didn't know the little bastard was lactose intolerant until he sh*t all in his pants and all over their couch.

That day, I learned why babysitters ask for the kids' diets and allergies.

15. From ktwarda:

Not so much a nightmare, but it was an odd night. I was in my senior year of college and picked up an occasional babysitting gig from Care.com. The family is well-to-do, awesome people in a hella good part of town and the kids are 8 & 12 so I'm really only there to make sure nobody burns the nice house to the ground.

With that being said, the younger one (who we'll call Adam) was definitely on the spectrum. I head over one night and the parents call Adam down. I notice he's just in his whitey tighties (which is how he slept) and he seems totally fucking out of it. The parents ask him to tell me what had happened. When he's too incoherent to tell me, they finally blurt out that he had his tonsils taken out like 48 hours ago. Oh, okay, awesome, thanks for the heads up, but I guess this is what I'm dealing with.

So anyways, Adam goes back to bed and I don't hear anything out of him for the next like five hours because little guy is high as f*ck on pain meds. I checked up on him a few times, we're good, whatever. It's now around 10-11 at night and I hear him come down the stairs and he's holding a stuffed animal Bowser.

"Hey buddy, how are you feeling?"

Adam says nothing.

"Whatcha doing, Adam?"

He silently walks to the kitchen.

"Adam, do you want something to eat?"

He opens the freezer in total silence still.

"Why don't you let me help you, Adam?"

To remind you, this kid is in nothing but his undies and holding a stuffed animal. He finally acknowledges my presence and looks me straight in the eye then gargles, Bowser hungry

Still cracks me up thinking about it.

TL;DR Kid is high AF, gets the munchies but can't communicate very well due to pain drugs/recently removed tonsils.

16. From cowtown456:

Babysat for a family with 3 boys when I was about 16, had no problems with the older two but once when it was time for bed, the 6-year-old decided to start playing the drum set in their basement. I tried to convince him to put the drumsticks away and come upstairs...cue him proceeding to hit me as hard as he could all over my arms as I tried to defend myself.

You wouldn't think something a bit bigger than a pencil would hurt but god was it painful. I was crying and convinced he'd broken at least a couple of my fingers when I managed to get one drumstick away, which led him to grab his Ipod charging to call his dad (who was away for business) and tell him his babysitter was being "mean".

Eventually had to call his mother to yell at him through the phone because I was half a second away from calling the police on this kid or just walking home a few doors down. Don't think he ever fell asleep before his mom got back, and didn't even get paid extra to make up for my inability to write for the next couple weeks.

17. From JyoungPNG:

I had a kid who was literally the embodiment of Cartmen from South Park. He fried his pet rat and tried to eat it. I wasn't there when it happened but when his parents told me I made sure to never see that devil again.

18. From The-Lying-Tree:

I was babysitting three little nightmares (one of them would tear apart her dolls then Frankenstein them Sid style but add a touch of red paint along the glue lines but that's a different story).

Before the mom left me with her three demon spawn children she told me the kids were allowed all the ice cream and candy and sugar they wanted but that they should go to bed around 9:30ish. Hearing this as soon as the mom left they went to town on the pantry. For the next four hours they would not calm down. They were breaking sh*t, they locked their kitten in one of the cabinets and I spent half an hour getting the poor thing out. They had a dead cat in the freezer and pulled it out to show it to me.

Around 10:00 the youngest has passed out and I carried him to his bed and tucked him in. One down two to go. Half an hour later the middle child has settled down in her room with her I pad just playing minecraft. Two down one to go.

The older sister is in the living room making one of her barbie hellspawn; this one had eight extra long limbs and no face. I really didn't want to confront this child because she was kinda scary. When I do convince her to go to bed she goes into the room she shares with her sister and YELLS to her sister (who was about 7) about how there was a monster in the house and that it was going to kill us all. Que her sister flipping out and jumping through the open window and running to the road at around 10:45 at night I freak out and jump out the window and run after her. I catch up to her just as a car is passing and all they see is me grabbing a little girl and dragging her into the forest.

So yeah, that was the last time I ever babysat for them.

19. From finelydressedbanana:

So I read the title and assumed you meant creepy children...but we can start with something pretty normal. I have been babysitting for almost 10 years.

Newish client, asked for some specific dates so she could complete her class. Only 2 hours, 3 kids. One was under a year, had colic,. Easy. Well well well. The mom and dad must have a shitty relationship because the oldest child lost a game and proceeded to GUILT his younger brother by not only calling him names, but insulting his intelligence and saying he was worthless.

He wasn't even 6 years old. His younger brother was four, and responded by crying, agreeing, and coming to the conclusion that he shouldn't have won because he wasn't smart enough. Yeah. A*shole child. I told him to go to his room after he refused to apologize for being mean, I walked him upstairs and told him it was only 5 minutes. He screamed, kicked the door, threw things at the door and then scratched me and told me I was stupid when I tried to sit him down and explain that he did something wrong. ~ let's just say I didn't go back.

Then there are parents who just should NOT have had children. I was doing a test run- a few hours in the afternoon- with a mother who only had one child. During that time, I witnessed her spank, grab, drag, yell in the face, and toss around a 2-year-old. She screamed at him because he was cranky while she was on the phone. He also didn't share because since he was the boss' child the other kids would be scolded if they didn't share with him.

And then I watch a 6-year-old. She has some sort of multiple personality disorder, but I didn't know that the first time I watched her. She speaks to herself, and me, in third person. And she speaks OF herself in third person, and always negatively. She also has anxiety and asks me about super creepy subjects. For instance today, she asked me what would happen if someone just stopped eating. I told her they would probably die. And she looked wistful. She has also spoken to corners. But she likes me, and her mom pays me well, so I keep coming back.

20. From polka_dotter:

I babysat for the neighbor kid. Quintessential spoiled only child. I was in my early teens and he was about 7 when this happened. I normally babysat during the week in summer while when school was out and his parents were at work, but occasionally they'd ask me to babysit for an evening out.

This was one of those evenings. His parents were out with the mom's sister and brother in law, so I was taking care of the kid and his 5-year-old cousin. They were pretty bratty, but nothing I couldn't handle. Until they decided that they had enough of me being in charge, and got out their pocket knives. Yes, their dads had gone out and bought pocket knives for them at ages 5 and 7, and decided it was cool for them to have them with no parental supervision.

So the boys got out their pocket knives and started chasing me around the house with them. I wasn't brave enough to try to disarm them, but I was smart enough to know these kids weren't able to understand the damage they could do, so I ran. They chased me out of the house and proceeded to lock all the doors.

This was long before 13-year-olds had cell phones, but luckily I was just at the neighbors' so I ran home. My dad is not a nice dude to begin with, but when I told him what was happening, he was livid. He went back with me and yelled for the boys to open the door. They unlocked it and then hid in the kid's bedroom. My dad ordered them into the living room so they hid under a blanket on the couch. He demanded their knives, so they handed them out from under the blanket. My dad went home, and I sat there while those two shit heads hid under their blanket until their parents came home.

Now here's the kicker. When the parents pulled in, my dad came back over, told the parents what happened and handed them the knives. And the parents gave the knives back to the boys. In front of us. Somehow I still ended up babysitting for those jerks after that. Anyway, years later it came out there was some seriously f*cked up sh*t happening to that kid so no wonder he had some behavioral issues. Sad really.

You've heard about Karens who make sure every meal comes with a side of "I demand to speak to the manager," but there are next-level entitled people who demand to speak to the SUN.

There are people on social media who forgot the lesson they learned in elementary school science: the earth revolves around the sun, not around them, even if they're the bride.

Here are some entitled people who are so wildly obnoxious, you can't help but laugh.

1. The bride who wants her fiancé to take a second job.

2. The lady who told the owner that she knows the owner.

3. The shopper who gave a store a bad Yelp review because the door was locked when they were closed.

4. The tourist who wished they could control bears.

5. The thief who ruined a neighbor's garden because they're a poor planner.

6. The woman who wanted to reschedule the sun.

7. The Karen who has extra instructions for the UPS man.

8. The 27-year-old who doesn't want their mom to have a life.

9. The mom who doesn't understand photographers.

10. The dude who thinks that periods are women's fault because their female ancestors weren't hunters.

11. The mom who doesn't want to hear about another child being kidnapped.

12. The moviegoer who was shocked they had to be quiet during the movie.

13. The jerk who only left a nickel as a tip because there are pandemic precautions.

14. The parent who thought that only parents should get Netflix.

15. The dude who did not consider what was happening on the other end.

Good teachers are criminally underpaid heroes who work incredibly hard to educate the future generations.

We all have a teacher who stands out from our childhood or high school, because they were able to teach both the curriculum as well as valuable and fun life lessons. Sometimes even the teachers everyone constantly complained about for enforcing too many rules or being ridiculously strict would turn out to be the favorite for their sense of humor or memorable stories. Even though they have shorter days and summers off, being a teacher is a serious challenge.

Not only do teachers of students of all ages have to deal with problems arising for the students themselves, but they also often have to mediate complaints from parents. "Why didn't my kid get an A?" "Why can't I do my kid's homework?" "Can I pull my kid out of school for 3 weeks to go on vacation with no consequences?" So, when a Reddit user asked, "Teachers of Reddit, what's the most outrageous thing a parent has ever said to you?" teachers were definitely ready to vent about their wildest interactions with overbearing parents.

1.

"She doesn't have to be smart, she has to be pretty. She will find a rich man, marry him and never use chemistry again." - [deleted]

2.

"I have clothes older than you." - chargoggagog

3.

I was told I had their permission to punish their child if they were not getting 100's on everything. This was in an elementary school. - Seashellcity

4.

One time, a parent whose kid committed plagiarism on an assignment about the Watergate scandal actually called me Nixon and demanded my resignation. For, you know. Pointing out that their kid committed plagiarism. - aaf12c

5.

Student and parent emailed trying to get me fired. Recipients? Principal, board of education, and Barack Obama. - dkl415

6.

A friend had a parent that insisted she re-do all the report cards using software he created, rather than the software used by the school board. The parent also complained that it was unfair his child was given 0 on assignments the kid didn't do, because nobody had explained that not doing the assignments would affect the overall grade. - PuxinF

7.

"Why aren't you making sure my child does his HOMEwork?" The lack of parental responsibility amazes me. - Lilyfrog1025

8.

Billy was harassing another student and calling him names like loser and nerd, the father replied "Well, is it true? Is the other boy a loser?" - BenHellaCreme

9.

I had a parent chew me out for letting her daughter get bug bites. At the daycare... On the playground... That happened to also have a barnyard and farm... When i tell people I'm a preschool teacher they said I must have so much patience because of the kids, its really the parents you need patience for. - [deleted]

10.

That I am a racist because I did not give a her child an A on a paper that she chose to write on President Obama. The fact that it was poorly written, unsupported by factual evidence, and completely disorganized apparently should not be taken into consideration. - mrsp71

11.

Had a student blatantly cheat in my class, gave him a 0 and his mom comes in to chat. The mother said right away, without knowing what happened, "My son would NEVER cheat! And he certainly would NEVER lie to me and has never lied to me."

Showed her hard proof that he did and she still defended her son...it was sad. - BlizzStaff

12.

Parent of a high school freshman: "My son is struggling so much. Can you send home a copy of the test ahead of time so he can prepare?" [Insert grumpy cat "nope" meme]

But my favorite (from a different mom, also of a high school freshman) was "Can you [the teacher who has 130 students every day] make sure he puts his homework in his homework folder every day? I want him to be better organized, but I just don't have the time. I have 5 kids!" - HomemadeJambalaya

13.

I work at a preschool. In our two year old rooms, we have a regulation that the kids can't move into the three year old room until they are mostly potty trained. Most of the students in there are 2, with a few that just recently turned 3.

There is one boy that is 4. He is not potty trained because, in his mother's words, she doesn't want to force him. - askingxalice

14.

A parent last year apologized for her son's attendance (45%) because she's had him in counseling for the past 6 months to help him cope with the loss of their hamster. 6 months of therapy. For a hamster. Never in my 19 years as an educator did I ever feel guilty for feeling zero sympathy for a chronic attendance excuse. - furious_20

15.

I'm currently a piano performance major and teach piano part-time.

During a trial lesson, one mom said, "I want my son to learn piano but I don't want to buy a piano. It'll be a waste of money." I explained that she could buy a cheaper electric keyboard.

She then proceeds to tell me, "But I don't want to waste too much money on this small hobby. I don't want him to become a musician and waste his life away."

It hurt as I sat there, shocked by this insensitive woman... telling a musician that her life is a waste. Thanks, lady. - SojuPrincess

16.

Me- you need to sign these incident reports. Your son keeps hitting other kids.

Mother- "He doesn't understand what he is doing. He won't stop hitting me unless I start to cry".

Me- speechless

I'm a preschool teacher... this kid weighs like 20 lbs when wet. - yrl88

17.

Science is hurting my child. They were religious - Danizdaman0506

18.

That I was responsible for the childhood obesity epidemic. With the 20 minutes of homework I gave three times a week. To high school honors freshmen. Yeah. - Grindlesaurus